Posted onDecember 27, 2022|Comments Off on Not Quite My Traditional Christmas (or Relaxing And Enjoying My Time Off)
I rarely get a long break from work, but I was so lucky that I had almost 4 days off for Christmas. I only had to work in the afternoon for 2 hours on Friday, but I had all of Saturday, Sunday, and Monday off. And going into the holiday weekend, I didn’t have many plans figured out. I knew I had work on Friday and I’d be going to a workout on Monday, but that’s all I really planned in advance. I didn’t want to make too many plans since I wanted to see how I felt about things, and I knew that if I wanted to do something at the last minute, I probably could figure something out.
It was nice to be able to sleep in later for those 4 days. I still don’t sleep in that late, but even getting the extra hour of sleep made a difference in how I felt. And I know more than ever that I need to work on my sleep schedule because I want to feel like this more often. And since I didn’t have to work until the afternoon on Friday, I enjoyed a nice lazy morning before logging in for work. Being able to do my routine things at a more leisurely pace was a nice change. And even though work was a bit stressful as the last shift before Christmas, it wasn’t too bad. And I think being more relaxed and rested helped me get through some of the craziness.
My normal plan for Christmas is to watch movies (either at home or going out to a movie theater) and ordering in Chinese food. But I had been invited to my friend Erin’s casual Christmas gathering, so I decided to order food on Saturday instead. Ordering on Christmas is usually really busy and crazy, so ordering a day early made it a lot easier to get food. And I still had leftovers so I had some to eat on Christmas Day as well.
On Christmas Day, I went over for a late lunch at Erin’s place. It was a very low-key and relaxed gathering and there weren’t too many people there. It also didn’t feel like a Christmas thing, so it wasn’t as awkward that I don’t celebrate Christmas. It was more like just a regular party where everyone was just enjoying being together and being social. And she made some really great food like lasagna and cheesecake, which was an awesome lunch!
After lunch was done, I went back home and watched some movies on Netflix, so I did still have a little bit of my normal Christmas. But it was a nice change to be around others instead of spending the day alone like I normally do.
And on Monday, I had to work on getting back to a bit of my normal routine so Tuesday wouldn’t be too much of a shock for me after several days of no schedule and nothing needing to be done. I did a lot of things that I usually do on Sundays like getting my house clean and figuring out what I need to plan for during the week. I still had a lot of free time to relax and I spent that time reading since I had downloaded a bunch of books from Kindle Unlimited over the weekend. I think Monday felt the most like a normal weekend day for me, which was probably a good thing.
I do have another odd week coming. The rest of my work week this week is normal since Friday isn’t a holiday and Saturday is a half day at the other job, but Saturdays are already half days so that’s what I’m used to. But I’ll get another Monday off in a week so I’ll have another opportunity to relax before I really have to get back to my normal routine and being busy at work.
But before I get to that craziness, I’m glad I had these past few days to get ready and I’m so happy that I got to mix a bit of my old Christmas tradition with a new plan to have a really amazing holiday weekend.
Posted onDecember 26, 2022|Comments Off on Last Regular Workout Week Of The Year (or I’m Almost To My Workout Goal)
This past week of workouts was the last week before I have 2 weeks of weird workout schedules. It was also the second to last week of the year and I’m so grateful that I’m almost to my workout goal for 2022. I was worried I might miss it since I had to take a week off at the beginning of the year, but I guess I made up for that time throughout the year!
I was feeling a bit off on Monday due to some pain issues, but it was much better than the week before. And I didn’t have to worry about how my injection would make me feel since I do that after my workout. So I tried to maximize this workout the best I could since I wasn’t sure how I’d feel the rest of the week.
For cardio, we had 3 blocks and they each had a different focus. The first block was all about endurance and had a 2-minute push pace, 1-minute base pace, 2-minute push pace, and 30-second all-out. The second block was about strength and we had 30-second intervals of a base pace at different inclines/resistance levels. And the last block was for power and we had rounds of 30-second all-outs and 30-second recoveries.
On the rower, we had one long block. We had a 400-meter, 200-meter, and 100-meter row with a medicine ball exercise between each row. And each time we went through those rows, we had a different exercise. The first time we had tricep extensions, the second time we had overhead presses, and the third time we had halos. I didn’t make it to the round with halos because I had to take some breaks during my row.
And on the floor, we had 3 blocks. The first block was all about doing work with the TRX straps. We had bicep curls, curtsy lunges, and rollouts. The second block was with weights and we had single-arm low rows and goblet squats. And the last block was also with weights and we only had single-arm snatches which was hard to do for the 2 minutes we had to do them.
Tuesday was a small class so our coach decided to make it a 2 group class instead of a 3 group one. So we had a lot less rowing than we normally would have, which was ok with me since I was really nauseous from my shot. But I did what I always do and just tried my best.
We had two blocks for cardio and they were very similar. The first block started with a 75-second push pace followed by a 1-minute base pace. Then we had a 1-minute push pace and 1-minute base pace before doing a 45-second all-out. We had a 90-second recovery and then did rounds of 45-second all-outs and 45-second recoveries. The second block was almost the same except instead of 45-second all-outs and recoveries we had 30-second ones. The first part of each block was harder for me than the second part of each block, but it was manageable.
And on the floor, we also had 2 blocks. Each block started with a 400-meter row, which was the only rowing we had. Then each block had 2 exercises focused on strength and 2 exercises focused on stability. The first block had front squats and chest presses for strength and lunges and bridge hold chest presses for stability. And the second block had scaptions and bicep curls for strength and kneeling scaptions and kneeling single-arm bicep curls for stability. I think I did better with the stability work since I wasn’t feeling ok using my regular heavy weights, but overall I was much happier with the floor work than I expected it to be.
Wednesday was a bit better of a day for me, so I was hoping I would be able to push myself a bit more in the workout than I have for other Wednesdays when I’ve been dealing with medication side effects.
For cardio, we had 2 blocks and they were both distance challenges that we did on our own. For the first block, we had decreasing distances we were supposed to do and between each distance, we had a minute to recover. And the second block had the same distances but in reverse order so we started with the shortest distance. The goal was to try to beat the distance in the second block, which I was able to do.
On the rower, we also had 2 blocks and it was similar to what we had for cardio. In the first block, we started with a 250-meter row and decreased the row by 50 meters each time. Between each row, we had back-and-forth hops. And in the second block, we did the same thing but started with a 100-meter row and went up by 50 meters each time. And again, I was able to beat my distance in the second block. I think I’m usually able to beat my distance when doing these sorts of challenges because I’m stubborn and need to prove to myself that I can do it. But whatever it takes to make myself work hard!
And on the floor, we also had 2 blocks and they were all timed for us. Everything was at a 30-second interval and there was not really any rest during the blocks. The first block had tricep extensions, chest flys, and shoulder presses. Then we had 30 seconds to do 4 reverse grip low rows and we could rest for any extra time in those 30 seconds. We repeated that pattern another time before doing the first 3 exercises again and ending the block with 30 seconds of high knees to mountain climbers. The second block was the same idea with lunges, deadlifts, and squats as the main exercises. Then we had 30 seconds to do 4 plank taps. And the last 30 seconds was doing high knees to mountain climbers again.
I was feeling almost completely normal by Thursday, which made me very happy. And I was extra happy because this was my 199th workout of 2022 and it made me really think about how I was able to reach my workout goals this year even with the issues I encountered. And this was a really tough workout to end this week with, but I also enjoyed the challenge.
For cardio, we had 2 blocks with similar patterns. The first block started with a 90-second push pace followed by a 1-minute base pace. Then we had a 1-minute push pace at a slightly higher incline followed by another 1-minute base pace. Then it was a 30-second push pace at an incline with another 1-minute base pace. And the block ended with a 45-second all-out at an incline. The second block was the same idea but we started with a 1-minute push pace instead of a 90-second one and the all-out was 30 seconds instead of 45 seconds.
The rower was also 2 blocks. The first block started with a 300-meter row followed by high knees. Then the row went down by 50 meters and we continued that pattern for the rest of the block. The second block started with a 100-meter all-out row then we could rest. I was able to get one of the highest wattages I’ve gotten on the rower during that row and that was a nice surprise. Then we had a 100-meter row at a base followed by a 150-meter push row. We continued the pattern of a base to a push row and increased the push row by 50 meters each time. I didn’t get that far in the second block because I was a bit gassed out from my crazy 100-meter row at the beginning of the block, but I still did pretty well with everything.
And the floor was also 2 blocks. The first block had single-arm squats to upright rows, speed skater lunges, and wide step knee drives which I had to do as wide step mountain climbers. And the second block had single-arm cleans, jumps to shuffle steps, and knee tucks which I did as regular mountain climbers. I know it doesn’t sound like a lot of work, but I really pushed myself through the entire workout and I think that’s what lead to it feeling like one of the harder workouts I’ve had lately.
For the next two weeks, I’m changing up my workout schedule a bit since I want to get in my traditional New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day workouts, but I also don’t want to have 6 workout days in a row. Right now, my plan is to still do 4 workouts each week and I don’t think that will change. But maybe I’ll feel extra motivated and will get in an extra workout either next week or the week after so I can either end a year or start a year with a little bonus.
Posted onDecember 23, 2022|Comments Off on A Quick Holiday Post (or I Hope You Are All Up To Fun Things This Weekend)
Even though the holidays don’t start until tomorrow, I know that today is the first day of holiday time off for many people. For me, it’s the first day off from one job, but I still have to work the other. But that is still a break from my usual schedule and craziness. And I’m planning on enjoying that time so this post is going to be something short and quick.
I know that not everyone spends the holidays with their family. I don’t do that since my family doesn’t celebrate Christmas. But I do hope that however you are celebrating the holidays, you are doing what you want to do and are able to have some fun. Even if you have to work for part of this weekend, I hope that there is still some time to relax.
I feel like we all have had a crazy year this year. It’s really been a crazy 3 years if you think about when the pandemic started. And things still aren’t back to what we all consider normal yet. But even with things being not quite normal, there is still a lot for us all to celebrate. Even if you don’t celebrate Christmas or any holidays this time of year, since we are coming up on the new year it’s a great time to reflect on what we are all grateful for. I know I complain a lot about different things, but I am so lucky in so many ways. And I appreciate getting to celebrate holidays in ways that make me happy.
So for this weekend, I’m planning on doing a lot of nothing and just enjoying some free time to relax. I will probably order Chinese food for Christmas since that’s my tradition. And while I don’t think I will go out to see a movie in theaters, I probably will watch at least one or two movies during my time off. To me, that’s the perfect way to celebrate this time of year!
So Merry Christmas to those of you who celebrate and Happy Hanukkah to those who celebrate that. And if you don’t celebrate anything this time of year, I hope you still are enjoying your time doing whatever you get to do this long weekend!
Posted onDecember 22, 2022|Comments Off on Gearing Up To Wind Down (or I Think I’ll Need These Days Off)
Because in the past I didn’t always get holidays off, I am always extra grateful when I get an extra day off. So many holidays are on Mondays and my box office job already has Mondays off. And there have also been a few years where Christmas and New Year’s fell on days I already had off so I didn’t feel like I had any real time off, I only had my normal weekend.
With my social media job, I do get holidays off, so that’s already an added bonus. So the Mondays that are holidays finally feel like a day off since I have time off from my Monday-Friday job. Between the two jobs, I do have slightly different holiday schedules and days off, but most of the days overlap so that helps a bit.
But for the first time in a long time, I feel like I have a real break. It’s not a long break, but it’s more than normal. For my social media job, I have Friday-Monday off, so that’s 2 extra days. And for my box office job, I have Saturday off. I will still need to work on Friday for the box office job, but that’s only 2 hours in the afternoon so that’s not too bad. I might actually work a few extra hours depending on how I feel to bank some extra time off I can use in the future. But I don’t have to decide that in advance.
I’m really looking forward to having all this time off. I don’t have any plans, and that’s ok with me. I just want to have time to rest and relax. And I’m honestly so happy I will have so many days in a row that I can sleep in a bit later because I’m still struggling with getting to bed on time. I am going to work on getting to bed earlier on my days off, but at least this way I’ll have the ability to sleep in a bit if I need to, and hopefully I will feel so much more rested by next week.
Because of all the extra time off, things have been extra crazy at both of my jobs this week. I’ve been getting a lot of stuff done so it’s not waiting for me on Tuesday because I know there will be a lot that comes in over the long weekend. I already know next week will likely be just as crazy because I’ll be catching up plus there is still one more holiday to go. For my box office job, this is one of our busiest times since so many people want to get a gift certificate to give as a holiday gift. At least I know that will calm down a bit next week. And for my social media job, I normally have a lot to do at the end of the month so I’ve been trying to get as much of a head start on that work as possible. But I know that since so many things can’t be done until the start of the new month, a lot will just have to wait and I will have my usual busy beginning of the month.
I know having a crazy week this week will probably make me appreciate my extra days off even more. And I’m fully planning on taking advantage of not having to do much for those days and getting myself ready for whatever craziness happens after the holidays.
Posted onDecember 21, 2022|Comments Off on Getting Something Checked Off My End Of The Year List (or Mailing Out Some Holiday Cheer)
Growing up, I remembered my family getting so many holiday cards from friends and family. They were always displayed in the living room and I loved looking at the photos that we got from everyone. Some people also sent letters, but I usually just loved looking at all the cards and photos. And of course, my parents sent out cards too. Even though I don’t live at home, I’m still included in the family holiday card (and they send one to me so I can see what they did).
For most of my 20s, I didn’t really get holiday cards from anyone. I think most people think of them as something you do when you have kids. But once I was in my 30s and started to get a few more cards from friends, I realized that they can come from anyone whether it’s from a family or just someone on their own. So I started to send out cards to others.
As the years have gone on, my holiday card list has gotten longer and I’ve been getting more and more cards from others as well. And I still love looking at the cards and the photos of my friends and their families. And now, I have a nice place in my entryway where I can display all the cards that I’ve gotten from people.
Even though most of the cards that I get from people are photo cards, I’ve never done that myself. I started getting cards that I could buy at the store or online because that’s the easiest way to do this. Then, once my holiday card list got longer, I realized doing postcards was a bit more cost-effective. Plus, since I’m not putting a photo on there, it didn’t feel as weird not having an envelope. And there were some cute postcards that I found online that I could buy, but a few years ago I realized I couldn’t find what I wanted and it would just be easier if I could make something myself.
So for the last few years, I’ve made my own postcards to send out for the holidays. They are nothing fancy and I use a template from Canva so I’m not custom-designing them, but I am able to change things up a bit to make them work for me. For example, last year’s card was not only a holiday card but also had my new address on it so I didn’t have to worry that people might mail things to the wrong place. But this year I didn’t do anything too crazy or fancy, I just did a simple design that I found and changed a bit to fit what I would want to send out.
I had gotten a bit stressed when I realized how soon the end of the year when I hadn’t gotten everything done, but the good thing about sending cards that say Happy New Year is that they can arrive a bit after the 1st and it’s still ok. But even if they were just regular holiday cards, I never mind getting them late so I would assume most of my friends feel the same way.
I got them printed through Vista Print, so it wasn’t too expensive to do that. I think between the printing and the stamps, I spent less than $50 to send them all out. That’s not bad considering how many I send and how happy it makes me to do something silly like this. And it didn’t take that long to do this either. I think the longest parts were waiting for the printed postcards to arrive and the line at the post office when I went to get postcard stamps. But once I had everything I needed, it was pretty quick to put all the postcards together so I could mail them out.
I know how much I appreciate not only getting holiday cards but anything in the mail that isn’t a bill or junk. Having something nice in the mail is a rare treat, so if I can make someone smile a bit by getting a postcard from me, that’s awesome!
Posted onDecember 20, 2022|Comments Off on Another Medication Shortage (or I’ll Just Have To Wait It Out Again)
There was a medication shortage when I had to get the first refill of my new injection. I knew this was a possibility as I had heard rumors of medication shortages from people online who were taking the same medication or similar ones. There are a lot of reasons why there has been a shortage of this category of medication. The biggest reason is that so many people are being prescribed it now.
For so long, obesity and weight issues were treated as motivation problems or laziness. Or doctors assumed you didn’t know what you were doing. I feel like I know more information about calories than most people do. I know what is considered good and what is considered bad. I know what you can eat so you can have a large volume of food for very few calories. And even though I do have an eating disorder, I have known for a long time that there is something else wrong with me. That’s why for so many years, I was going through a ton of medical testing to see if it was a thyroid issue or if there was another imbalance in my body. But doctors never could find what was wrong and I just was treated as someone who had a weight issue and that it was completely my fault that I am this weight and am not losing weight.
But finally, I think more doctors are understanding that obesity is a disease and not just a personal issue. You could ask so many people who have struggled with their weight and they would probably have similar stories to mine. They have tried so many things and maybe only the most extreme things have worked for them. There is just something else wrong with their body that nobody could figure out. But now, doctors are getting that and are working to find ways to work on this concern with patients instead of just lecturing patients and trying to scare them into losing weight by saying they will have all these other medical issues that may or may not actually be related to weight.
So since this is being understood differently, people can finally get treatments like what I’m doing. I know there are some people who are just trying to lose like 10 pounds and are finding doctors to prescribe this to them, but that’s not most people taking it. And I guess the drug manufacturer is just surprised that people would want to try something that is supposed to help with weight loss. I know there were other issues with the manufacturing that caused a slowdown, but I think the biggest issue was just them being unprepared.
With the first refill, my doctor allowed me to start the higher dosage early since that injection pen was available at that time. And since I was going to start that higher dosage eventually, it wasn’t a big deal for me to jump to the next level. And while I’ve had more side effects, they have gotten better from week to week and I’m glad that I’ve been able to do this.
But now that I’ve needed to put in my next refill request (at the dosage I’m at, I need a new pen every 4 weeks), there’s another shortage happening. There’s no estimate for when the injection pens will be available again and I’ll just be notified when my refill is ready for me. I’m hoping that since I have about a week before my next injection that it could arrive in time. Or maybe I’ll just have a single week off if it comes in next week. It’s frustrating because this is working for me and I am seeing results. They might not be as fast as I would have liked, but I also know that this is much more normal than other weight loss things I’ve experienced before. It’s still not a miracle or something magical, but it helps so much. And I am nervous about having to stop taking it again, especially when I don’t know how long I’ll have to wait.
I don’t have another option since I’m not going to pay full price for the injection pen at another pharmacy (which would cost over $1000). And just like the last time I needed to get a refill, I’m just going to have to be really careful and mindful if I have some time off between injections because I don’t want the hard work I’ve been putting in the past few months to go away.
I might be overreacting and I’ll be told in a day or two that my refill is ready. But I’m also mentally preparing myself for what might happen. And this could happen over and over again with the refill requests for a while. I don’t know when they will work on producing more injection pens to meet demand. So I might be going through this every month for the foreseeable future. But I don’t have another option right now and I’m just going to find a way to make it work.
Posted onDecember 19, 2022|Comments Off on I’m So Glad I Pushed Hard This Past Week (or Having A Good Day In A Bad Week)
I knew this past week of workouts was going to be a struggle for me with pain and nausea. But as I had written last week, I just had a lot of different issues that made my week extra difficult. I was getting really frustrated with how I was feeling and what that meant for my workouts. But as always, I pushed through and I was able to end this past week on a really good note.
Monday’s workout was the last workout for the 12 Days Of Fitness, and it was the day that I earned my swag. I was feeling pretty bad that day, but I was hoping that I could do some good work because I knew there was a good chance this would be my best day of the week. But it was a tough day as each section of the room felt like one long block.
For cardio, everything was 90-second intervals. Every 90 seconds, we were supposed to increase either the speed or incline/resistance level. I really tried my best to pedal faster when we were supposed to increase our speed, but that’s something that is hard for me normally and extra hard for me when I was having a bad hip day. But I did my best with it.
On the rower, we did have challenge distance goals but I didn’t focus on those since I knew I’d be struggling on the rower. We also had 90-second intervals just like we did for cardio. But this time we started every 90 seconds off of the rower and did either overhead or front presses with a medicine ball for 15 reps. And then whatever time was left we had for rowing. I usually had about 30 seconds on the rower each time after I was done with the exercise and getting strapped back in, so I didn’t get a lot of rowing done toward the distance.
And on the floor, again everything was in 90-second intervals. We alternated between two groups of exercises. The first group was lateral lunges, single-arm high rows with weights, and then jumping jacks. And the second group was regular lunges, single-arm shoulder presses with weights, and butt kicks. It felt like there was no time to catch your breath and it was a really tough workout. But I wouldn’t expect anything different for the last day of a challenge.
Tuesday was a particularly rough day for me. When things are this bad, sometimes I just have to do my own thing a bit for the workout because that’s all I can manage. And that’s how some of Tuesday went.
For cardio, we focused on a lot of incline work, but I was just doing my regular base, push, and all-out resistance levels and trying to follow along with the intervals with everyone else. I know I wasn’t doing exactly what the workout was supposed to be, but it was better than doing nothing. And I knew that the combination of all the issues I was going through made things a lot harder than I’m used to overcoming.
On the rower, both blocks were focused on 150-meter rows. We rowed that distance and then had an exercise and went back and forth for the entire block. In the first block, we had squats as our exercise and I did do those between each row. In the second block, we were supposed to do front and back steps between each row, but I was more focused on just breathing through my nausea so I just did my rows without the exercise. I didn’t always do the full row without a break, so it was more like I did short bursts of rowing with rest when necessary for that entire block.
I feel like I did a bit better on the floor for this workout, but that’s probably only because the rest was so bad. In the first block, we had deadlifts, upright rows, good mornings, and single-arm shoulder presses. And in the second block, we had front raises, lateral lunges, and regular lunges. I felt so defeated after this workout because of what I couldn’t do, and I know that didn’t help how I was feeling overall and probably made my physical pain worse with mental stress. As much as I tried to remind myself that at least I tried, it’s hard to believe that at times.
Wednesday was still bad, but I felt like I had a bit less nausea that day and my hip pain was significantly better so that helped to make my mood better too. So I knew I could do a bit more and pushed myself to do just that.
For cardio, the first two blocks had the same pattern. We had a push pace, a 90-second base, an all-out, a 1-minute recovery, a push pace, and an all-out. In the first block, the pushes and all-outs were 45 seconds long. And in the second block, the pushes and all-outs were 30 seconds long. And for the last block, we had rounds of 30-second all-outs and 30-second recoveries. This went so much better than earlier in the week went. I think the short intervals and all the recovery time helped me so much.
On the rower, we started with a 3-minute row followed by squats. Then we had 2 rounds of a 90-second row with lunges between each row. The goal for each 90-second row was to do at least half of what we did in the 3-minute row. And the rowing work ended with 3 rounds of a 1-minute row with squats to calf raises between each row. I only made it to one of the 1-minute rows, but I’m glad that I did pretty well with each row and was able to beat the goal distance each time.
On the floor, we had 2 blocks. The first block was a bit tough for me because it was supposed to be regular lunges and then jump lunges, but I can’t do jump lunges. So I just combined the number of reps and did regular lunges for both. And we were supposed to do bridge rows on the straps, but I had to do just regular low rows on the straps. In the second block, we had bicycle presses, push-ups, and hip bridges. I didn’t go quite as heavy as I would have liked for the hip bridges, but that’s something that I know I need to work back up to because I’ve lost a bit of my strength.
Thursday was a day I was nervous about. It was the 2000-meter row benchmark, which is one of the hardest benchmarks for me. Not only is it one of the hardest ones for me, but I was also dealing with the pain and nausea so I knew that would be an additional challenge. I knew I would just try and see what would happen.
Because we had a small class, we all started on the rower to do the benchmark first. I knew that I wouldn’t get a PR since my PR was from when I was a lot better at rowing. So I set other goals for myself. I wanted to see if I could get a faster time than my last benchmark, which was very slow. And I wanted to try to take as few breaks in the row as possible. In the past, I’ve tried to only take a break after every 500 meters, which was a good goal, and I decided to try to do it again this time.
We are always told to start the benchmark with about 10 hard pulls on the rower before settling into a pace and intensity that we could ideally continue at for the entire time. I did that and then watched the 500-meter split time to see if I could keep that consistent. I was able to keep it within about 10 seconds for the entire row and I knew that split time would get me to my goal. And by some miracle, I didn’t really have to take any breaks. I did have to stop a few times to tighten my foot straps, but that is different from a break. And at the end for the last 200 meters, I just went as hard as I could knowing I was almost done. I knew it wasn’t a PR, but it was a huge improvement over last time and closer to my PR than I’ve been in a while!
I was shocked that I was under 11 minutes and that I didn’t really take breaks. Neither of those were things I thought would be possible. Maybe I found the perfect pace to row so I didn’t need breaks like I normally do. Or maybe I was just being stubborn and that pushed me through the row. Whatever it was, I was so proud of myself. But I know I overdid it quite a bit on the rower and that affected the rest of my workout.
On the floor, I was exhausted from the row and was a little lightheaded, so I had to go slowly and rest a lot more than I thought I would. The floor had hip hinge swings, woodchoppers, chest presses with straps, plank taps, and superheroes on the floor. I was going a bit lighter with the weights because of how I was feeling, but I still think even with the breaks I had to take and the lighter weights, it was worth it because I knew how well I did on the row.
And we ended with cardio where we did things at our own pace. We had distance challenges and then 1 minute to recover after each distance. For the distance, it was .25-miles for the treadmills which was 1 mile for me. And just like on the floor, I had to take more breaks than I would have liked because I was still recovering from the row. But again like on the floor, I was ok with that because I was still proud of my row time.
I wasn’t expecting to end last week with a workout highlight between how I was feeling and knowing how little I was looking forward to the benchmark. But I’m so happy that I surprised myself so much with how my last workout of the week went. It was nice to end a bad week with a good workout so I could go into my weekend feeling strong. And hopefully, the pain and nausea continue to get better through the beginning of this week so I can have a better workout week and end my year of workouts on some more positive notes!
Posted onDecember 16, 2022|Comments Off on Finding Some Good In Life (or This Feels Like A Turn Compared To The Beginning Of The Week)
I finally had a change for my week. I hated feeling like the week wasn’t a good week, but I also knew I just needed to get through it and things would be better. I’m not in a great mood and still have some negative things, but I’m so happy that I’m ending my week a lot better than how I started it.
I still have some bad pain and nausea, but that’s my normal and I’m used to this. I know it will get easier over the weekend and at the beginning of next week. And hopefully, by this time next week, I won’t have any of those issues to deal with for another few weeks. And the side effects from my injection are much better now. This is what I’ve been expecting since they usually go away toward the end of the week each week. Just feeling a bit better made a huge difference in my mood. And it also makes it feel like things are on an upswing compared to being in the middle of a frustrating time. I know that I will have the side effects from my injection again at the beginning of next week, but each week that passes brings me closer to hopefully not having any more of these bad side effects. It might be a month or two before I get to that point, but I’m closer now than I was before.
And I just had some silly random moments come up in the past day or so. Some of my friends have shared some ridiculous things that they knew would make me laugh. And there have been some really crazy things in the news in the last day that you couldn’t help but laugh at. I hadn’t had many random laughs like that earlier in the week and I really needed these. I didn’t have a ton of leisure time, but at least these little breaks in my day to look at something that wasn’t related to work made my work time a bit better.
I also ended up having a bit less work to do this week than expected. It was a really busy week because this time each month I have a few tasks that have deadlines. But I was originally supposed to add on another task to cover work for someone else. That changed and the extra work was covered in a different way. I had to modify a few tasks because of the change, but it wasn’t much more than I’m used to doing so that was good. And the modifications I have to do to my work might bring a few new workflows that I can use in the future that might make my regular work a little easier. I’m not sure if these processes will help, but it doesn’t hurt to see what other ways I can do my work.
And as I wrote yesterday, I’ve been working on focusing on what I can control and manage. Making sure I’m eating ok helps my mood and can sometimes help my pain and nausea too. And I’ve been continuing to work on getting more sleep since I know that can make the most difference in how my mood is and how I’m feeling.
Things aren’t perfect for me right now, but they are better. And I think it’s important to recognize when things aren’t going so great since sometimes that can mean that you could need more help than you thought. I have been dealing with stuff like this long enough that I knew I would be ok and wasn’t having a bigger mental health issue. But if I was, I wouldn’t hesitate to get help. And if you haven’t been going through this sort of thing, you might not be able to tell the difference. Mental health can be a slippery slope, especially when it’s combined with physical health stuff. But I’m glad that it seems like I’ve turned a corner and hopefully the second half of my month goes much better than this past week.
Posted onDecember 15, 2022|Comments Off on Trying To Not Keep Writing Negative Posts (or Doing What I Can)
I feel like every post recently has been something negative. I don’t like that at all. I know it’s being truthful and honest and I don’t hide how I feel, but I also don’t feel like all the negativity is really accurate with how my life is going. The things I’m going through sound a lot worse than they are. I know a lot of people in my life feel bad for me when I’m going through pain and nausea. And I do appreciate that my friends know that it can be really bad and don’t try to downplay what I go through. But at the same time, this is something I go through every month so I can usually tolerate it. Or if I can’t tolerate it, I have things I can do that help. It might mean I don’t do much with my time outside of obligations, but I know I will always get through the pain and nausea eventually.
I can’t necessarily control when I’ll be feeling this way, but I have a general idea of when it will happen and how long it will last. Sometimes I’ll be surprised and things start sooner or later than normal or the duration is different from normal. And it’s always a variable about how severe things can be on a particular day. But I’m grateful that at least I can plan a bit for when this will be happening. But between feeling sick and the other not-so-great things going on in my life, I’m really focusing on what I can control at this point.
I’ve been really trying to focus on making sure I take care of myself in whatever ways I can. I’m still not great about getting enough sleep, but I’m making more effort to work on this. I’m making sure I go to bed at the time I should, I just don’t always fall asleep quickly enough. And sometimes, if I’m reading in bed and almost to the end of a book, I’ll stay up later than I should so I can finish the book before going to sleep. I’m trying to be good about what I eat as well, but that’s a harder struggle than most things. But I’m still trying and making an effort to be thoughtful about my meal planning (even if that means my plan is to order food). I’m also making sure that I pick things that I know my body tolerates better than others because I know some food might make me feel worse. This is a bit of trial and error because the new medication has made me have different reactions to different foods, so I don’t always know if something will be ok or not. But I have to keep trying so I don’t get into a bad food rut. And when I do eat something that makes me feel a bit sick, I don’t get mad at myself because I know I didn’t know that would happen.
And I’m allowing myself to practice self-care in whatever way feels right. Sometimes that means spending my free time reading or watching tv and not doing much else. Sometimes that means trying to find a friend to talk to in order to get some feelings out there in the open. And sometimes that’s doing stuff that others might see as frivolous but I don’t really care because they are things I like or that make me happy.
I can’t exactly predict when I will be feeling better or at least more like myself. I have an idea of when the pain and nausea will end, but that’s not the only thing controlling my mood these days. But all I can do is make the most of what I can each day and continue to hope for the best. I know this feeling is temporary and soon I will be much happier and more excited about things. But for now, I’m just going through a moment of a low and I have to allow myself to work through this time.
Posted onDecember 14, 2022|Comments Off on Not Really In A Mood (or I Guess This Goes Along With Not Feeling Well)
Compared to when I wrote my post yesterday about not feeling great, I’m feeling both better and worse right now. I’m glad the rain ended (even though we do need the rain in LA) because my hip is doing much better. But my pain and nausea are much worse right now. The side effects from my injection are about the same right now, but that’s what I was expecting. It seems like they are only easing off in the last day or so that I have them and then sometimes I’ve gotten a break before I have to do my next injection.
I was talking to a friend on the phone yesterday about how I was feeling and I had a weird realization. Other than being annoyed with the pain and nausea I was experiencing, I wasn’t necessarily in a bad mood. I wasn’t in a good mood either. I couldn’t figure out how to explain it other than saying that I wasn’t in any mood. I wasn’t necessarily numb, which I know could be a sign of depression, I just didn’t really have a sense of how I was feeling and I didn’t think I was feeling any particular way.
After having that call, I started to think about that idea more. I think I’m having this lack of mood for a few reasons. I think the biggest reason is that I’m in a rut with a few different things right now. My regular daily schedule is a bit of a rut because I’m not doing much after work. But I’m also not doing much after work because of how I feel. It’s really tough to want to do something after a full day when I spent most of the day feeling off and all I want to do after work is to lay down or rest. It’s hard being in this repeating cycle of feeling off. I was used to it when it was 2 weeks a month and I had a good idea of what the pattern would be. But now, it’s every week and it’s a bit unknown how each week will be. I know this is temporary and hopefully within a month or two I’ll be over this and not spending every week dealing with side effects.
I think also I’m in this weird non-mood because of the holiday season. I don’t hate the holidays, normally I would say I’m someone who likes to celebrate all holidays big or small with weird little traditions. And I’m still planning on doing some of my regular Christmas traditions that I do on my own. But I think it’s more the realization that another year has passed and I feel like very little has changed in my life. I know this isn’t true. Buying my condo and all the changes with my day job situation are huge. But I think I look at the stagnation in my personal life as more powerful than other changes I might have made. I know I had this feeling a lot during the first year or two of the pandemic when it felt like my life was on hold. It feels like the last 3 years haven’t really happened. I can’t believe that I’ll be turning 40 next year. I know I need to let go of some of the ideas I had in my head about what 40 would look like, but it still seems like I’ve gotten stuck in the same place for years. And having the holidays coming up is just another reminder that this year is almost over and I have to think about what I have accomplished and what I want to accomplish.
I also think that I’m a bit lonelier this year during the holidays than I was before. Before the pandemic, I had a lot of friends that lived here and we would do silly things this time of year. Being single didn’t bother me as much because I had other things going on. And now, so many of my friends have moved away, and being single hits me a bit harder. I haven’t hit a wall with dating just yet, but it’s very frustrating to have the same conversations over and over again or to have the same situations happen. I’m ready for something to be different, but there’s no way to force that to happen. All I can do is try to not think about the past when going into a new match or date and believe that this could be the one that breaks the mold.
I know that I’ll be out of this non-mood soon enough (or maybe I should say I’ll be in a mood soon). I have a bunch of factors right now that are just making things not great but not awful for me and I need to let this time pass. And hopefully, once I’m passed this time, I can get into the holiday spirit a bit more and enjoy everything that is out there to enjoy.
A Very Low-Key Holiday Weekend (or Enjoying A Real 3 Day Weekend)
