Monthly Archives: April 2021

A Painting Night (or My Artistic Ability Shocked Me)

Posted on April 16, 2021 | Comments Off on A Painting Night (or My Artistic Ability Shocked Me)

I’ve written a few times about how I have been trying to find more fun and social things to do while still being safe. There are a lot of virtual events out there, but I haven’t been doing too many of them. Money issues were one reason why, but also I think I needed a push to sign up for them. And I really wanted to make sure someone else I knew was going to join in because even though everyone was participating at home, I didn’t want to be alone.

When I was in Santa Barbara recently, my friend Dani texted me about a virtual painting class she just signed up for. She wanted to see if I was interested in doing it too. It was through a company that does Paint and Sip nights where it’s a big group hanging out and painting something together. And because of the pandemic, they were doing these nights virtually where they bring you all the supplies you need and you participate over Zoom. I’m not artistic that way (I joke that I can’t even draw a circle), but it wasn’t that expensive and it sounded like something fun to do for an evening. So I decided to sign up for the same class.

All the supplies I needed were dropped off the day before the class.

We got paint, paint brushes, a canvas, a tabletop easel, a water cup, paper towels and plates, an apron, and a photocopy of what we were going to be painting for reference. I asked Dani if she wanted to come over to my house to paint together and she decided to do that. So I covered my dining room table to protect it and set up my art space before the class and left the other side of the table open for Dani to set up.

Even though we were standing close together, we both had iPads with the class on Zoom so it was easy for us both to see what was happening without looking over. And to keep it from being echoey, Dani turned off the sound on her iPad and I put my sound through my Bluetooth speaker so we could hear the class clearly. We kept ourselves on mute for most of the class, but we did turn the microphone on from time to time to chat with the instructor.

I was a bit worried about how my painting would come together. I really cannot draw and I have rarely used paint for anything. I took an art class in college and most of my projects were done with pencil or by making a mosaic out of paper scraps. But I also knew these types of classes were designed for people who aren’t artists, so I was hoping for the best.

I didn’t take a ton of pictures while we were working on the painting since I was focused on making it look ok, but I got a few. We started with mixing some of the colors and thinning them out so we could paint the background. We were given instructions on how to make the colors blend so we didn’t have really harsh lines and I was pretty happy with the background when I was done with that part.

Next, we worked on the moon and some of the branches on the top of the painting. Those were pretty easy, although doing the moon stressed me out because it was a circle. But I got it to a place where I was happy with how it looked. And for the branches, we had a bit more freedom to do what we wanted. I didn’t want to overdo them, but I wanted to have enough to make my painting look full.

And for the flowers, we got some great instructions on how to make them with only a few brush strokes. I was shocked that I was able to do it because I thought they’d be so hard! But it was really only about 4 or 5 brush strokes to create each of the big ones and about 3 to create the little ones. I didn’t know it at the time, but now I wish I had put my flowers a bit higher up. But it’s ok.

At the end of the class, we worked on the stems of the flowers, leaves, grass at the bottom, and any other detail work. Dani and I both played around a bit for this part by adding some details like yellow leaves (since that’s what happens in nature when plants are dying) and some blue flowers on the branches because we both thought that looked pretty.

And after 2 hours, the class was done and I had a completed painting that I was shocked that I was able to create!

I love how even though Dani and I were using the same supplies and colors and following the same instructions, our paintings were identical and I felt they both had some personality to them.

I really loved taking this class. It was a fun way to spend my evening, but it also felt really great to see that I do have more artistic ability than I thought I did. I don’t know where I will hang the painting up because my house doesn’t have a lot of wall space. I might store it away and save it for later. But I’m really proud of what I made and I’m not ashamed that I’m proud of myself. I haven’t had a lot of things that made me proud lately, and this was a great moment for me to remind myself that I am more than what I’ve been doing lately.

I might sign up for another paint night next month and try to see if I can get more friends to do it too. I don’t know if we could all be in the same place while painting (it depends on people being vaccinated), but even if it’s over Zoom I know it would be fun. I’m slowly adding more fun to my life these days, and each time I do something it reminds me of how much I need it. And this was the perfect reminder of what I can still do while being safe but also having a great night!

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A Random Panic Attack (or It’s Been A While Since This Happened)

Posted on April 15, 2021 | Comments Off on A Random Panic Attack (or It’s Been A While Since This Happened)

I’ve had a panic/anxiety disorder for a long time. I honestly don’t know how long I’ve had it since I think I wasn’t diagnosed properly at first. I remember being diagnosed with depression when I was about 18, but I actually think looking back that it was really panic/anxiety and not depression. And there was a period of time where my panic/anxiety disorder was pretty bad. It never got so bad that I couldn’t function properly, but it did affect my life a lot. I was on one medication daily and another medication as needed.

Then I went down to only taking the medication as needed and stopped the daily one. I didn’t need it that often, but often enough that I would get refills for the prescription a few times a year. Then it went down to only having panic attacks for a few situations like going to the dentist or flying on a plane. Very rarely, I’d have a random panic attack or a wave of anxiety, but I could usually pinpoint what caused it. And sometimes for me, knowing the cause helps to make it not as bad.

And for the past few years, it seems like I rarely have to think about my panic/anxiety disorder. I don’t seem to have panic attacks at the dentist anymore. I don’t even have to take medication. I do get some anxiety going to my appointments, but it’s manageable and I’m usually able to get over the anxiety around the middle of my appointment (once I know that there is nothing severely wrong with my teeth). I rarely fly, so I can’t really judge how my anxiety is with that, but I guess avoiding a trigger is a way of dealing with it. And the random attacks almost never happen to me.

I did have more anxiety than normal over this past year, but I think most people had that feeling. And it wasn’t as bad as what I’ve experienced in the past at my worst moments. So the general feeling of anxiety is just something I got used to and learned to tolerate.

But then earlier this week, I had my first big random panic attack in a while. And I honestly don’t know what caused it.

That day I did my work as normal. Once I was done with work, I went to AAA to renew my car registration. That’s usually a quick outing, but it took a very long time. They were only letting a few people inside at a time, and for some of us they didn’t let us in at all. For me, they took my check and car registration paperwork and I waited outside while they did the work. Then they came back and brought me my new registration paperwork and sticker. I was annoyed how long it took, but it wasn’t bad. And after that was done, I decided to go to Trader Joe’s for some groceries.

Going to Trader Joe’s almost feels like a treat these days. I still do a majority of my grocery shopping online and have it delivered to my house. And for a while, I was maybe going to Trader Joe’s once a month since there are some things there that I can’t get at other stores. But I’m slowly going more often. I’m still not going that much, but now I’m getting groceries there 2-3 times a month. I’m grateful that even though it is a smaller store, it’s not that crowded inside. At the beginning of the pandemic, you had to line up outside because so many people were trying to grocery shop. But now, things have calmed down enough so you don’t have to wait in line.

My grocery list was short and I got everything I needed quickly and got in line to check out. And then the panic attack hit me like a wall. It was 0 to 60 in an instant. And I still don’t know what triggered it. I just know that one moment, I was feeling fine and the next I was experiencing everything I get with panic attacks. I was having trouble catching my breath (and wearing a mask doesn’t help that feeling). I could feel my heart racing. I was shaking and sweating. My entire body felt jumpy and like I needed to not just stand still.

I thought about just leaving my groceries and going home to deal with the attack, but I ended up waiting it out since I was almost at the front of the line. I’m sure people could see that something was wrong with me, but I’m glad nobody asked me if I was ok. I couldn’t really get the words out if I wanted to. I paid for my groceries and got to my car where I tried to calm down a bit more. I was able to calm myself enough to feel ok to drive and then headed home (fortunately, the store is very close to my house). But the attack wasn’t over and when I got home I put away what I had to and went to lay down on my bed.

I tried to focus on breathing and staying calm. I tried to think about what caused this attack to rationalize it. It took just under an hour before I felt normal again. But I think about half that time was just recovering from the attack and how exhausted it made me feel. Panic attacks can really take it out of you both physically and mentally. But I was able to get back to feeling ok later that afternoon and continue on with my day.

I know that any mental health issue isn’t necessarily something you can get over, it’s something you learn to manage and deal with. But when it’s been a while since I’ve had to deal with an attack, it can be a little harder to get over since I’m out of practice. I might have a random panic attack every so often for the rest of my life, and that’s ok. I just have to remember that I can get through it and that I’m ok and safe. And in a weird way, being out of practice with dealing with them makes me a bit happy since that’s a sign that this is a rare occurrence and not a regular part of my life.

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First Union Meeting In A While (or Feeling Informed Again)

Posted on April 14, 2021 | Comments Off on First Union Meeting In A While (or Feeling Informed Again)

Before the pandemic, I had a few different union events and meetings I would go to. I went to the local board meetings to be an observer which was about once a month. I tried to go to social events like the holiday party. I went to unofficial union meetings through Union Working. And I was on my first committee with SAG-AFTRA, the organizing committee. I never could attend the organizing committee meetings in person because they were during my work time, but they always had a way for me to attend virtually. It was a little odd to be one of the few people listening in when a majority of the committee was together in person. But I made sure I was as prepared as I could to listen so I didn’t miss anything I needed to know about.

When everything shut down, the union had to focus on what was most needed by members. Those things included departments like safety (since people were working) and residuals (so people could be paid). A lot of the staff had to be furloughed so there weren’t as many staff members as before who could help out with different committee meetings. So the organizing committee wasn’t able to meet. While that was unfortunate, I understood why other parts of the union needed more focus.

But things are starting to slowly reopen here, so that means that things are also starting to pick up again. There are still a lot of things that aren’t back to normal yet, but it’s starting to get there as more and more people are vaccinated. And because they are opening up again, we finally had our first organizing committee meeting since the pandemic.

This time, nobody was at the union for the meeting. Everyone was on Zoom together and I think I preferred that. It was nice to be able to see everyone’s face and to have it easy to know who is talking. And when we had someone presenting information, they were able to do a screen share so we could all see the slides instead of me listening and taking notes (and getting copies of the slides after the meeting). And it was a little easier to hear everyone since everyone was in the same system versus having one microphone in a larger room where some people might be closer or further from it.

But what I liked most about it was that it happened. I have missed feeling like I’m involved in the union. It has become a big part of my life and I don’t know if I really understood that until I didn’t have it. And while I have tried my best to stay informed about what’s going on, I know I haven’t been doing a great job at that. When I’m attending meetings, I’m much more aware of union news than I am when I’m just looking it up on my own. And like with so many things I haven’t been able to do over the past year, I think I didn’t realize how much I missed and needed this until I got to do it again. I didn’t forget about being involved, but there was so much that I was missing that I couldn’t pinpoint anything specific. But after this recent meeting, I realized how much this meant to me and how much I crave it.

There’s no timeline yet for things being back to how they were. I know that there was an announcement that things should be 100% open again in CA by mid-June, but that’s not a guarantee. We’ve all learned over the past year how quickly things can change. But I’m hoping that if things are really able to open by mid-June, that means that we will also be closer to being back to the regular schedule for union meetings. Even if they have to be virtual for a bit longer, I’d love to have these as a part of my routine again.

And while I am waiting for the next meeting, no matter which group or committee it will be for, I want to work on catching up on news and information that I might have missed. I want to find ways to learn and stay on top of the news without the meetings. It won’t be easy, but I know now how important that will be. Maybe this means that by the next meeting I will have things to share. I usually am more of a listener, but I can empower myself to be a more involved and active member.

I’m going to think of this first meeting as the start of things picking up again for me and my work with union service. I hope that is true and I will have more union events to share on here coming up. I love being able to share what I learn and know when I can. And hopefully, I will be able to do that more often between meetings and my own efforts in learning.

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Feeling A Bit Less Stressed At The Dentist (or Just Having Normal Panic)

Posted on April 13, 2021 | Comments Off on Feeling A Bit Less Stressed At The Dentist (or Just Having Normal Panic)

There are a lot of things that everyone has been putting off for the past year. I’m guilty of this too. There are doctor appointments that I should have scheduled last year that I didn’t do. None of them were urgent and my doctors were ok with me putting things off. Eventually, I’ll start working on scheduling those again but I’m still being cautious about where I go and what I do. So unless I need to get to the doctor for some reason, I’m waiting just a little longer.

When the pandemic started last year, any appointments I had scheduled were canceled. That included the dentist. And they said they would let me know when things were opening again so I could reschedule. But this was when we all thought this might only take a month or two before life was back to normal. And if I didn’t have an issue with one of my crowns, I know I would have continued to put off dentist appointments. I don’t know how long I would have put them off because I know that I have genetically bad teeth. And I learned when I went in for replacing my crown that waiting as long as I did have some negative effects. I was ok and my teeth are fine, but it was a sign that I need to make sure I continue to go regularly.

And for the most part, I have done that. It is weird going to the dentist right now since there is no way to keep a mask on while they are cleaning your teeth. But I trust my dentists to keep things clean and they are being very cautious about when they schedule patients so that any overlap is minimal. I do appreciate the efforts they have been making to keep things clean and safe, but it’s still been extra stressful whenever I’ve gone in. I knew they were being careful, but there was always a small risk about being somewhere without a mask on if there was another patient there also without a mask (all the staff has masks and shields, so I wasn’t too worried about them).

When I scheduled my most recent dentist appointment, it was when I was leaving after my last appointment. At that time, I was hopeful about getting a vaccine at some point, but I had no idea when it was going to happen so that timing wasn’t something I considered while scheduling it. But once I got my first vaccine and knew when I’d be fully vaccinated, I looked at my schedule and realized my dentist appointment was 3 weeks before I would be fully vaccinated. So I called to reschedule and my dentist agreed that it was a smart decision. 3 weeks wasn’t going to make a huge difference and it would be much safer for me to be there if I was fully vaccinated.

I had my dentist appointment last week and it went as well as I could have hoped. I’m always fearful that I will find out that there is something horribly wrong with my teeth. I know that I do everything I can to make sure that doesn’t happen, but I can’t always prevent it. That’s why we have to go in for professional cleanings. If we could do enough at home, we’d only be at the dentist when something was really wrong. There were some small issues that were related to waiting an extra 3 weeks before my appointment, but nothing that bad or unexpected.

And even though I will always be a bit panicky at the dentist, it was nice to not have to be panicked about COVID as well. I still felt a bit weird being somewhere without a mask, but I don’t have the same fear that I had before. I know that if I am exposed, I will likely be ok. And I did see some of the cleaning procedures between patients this time, and that made me feel better seeing all the work they did to keep everyone safe. Having one less thing to worry about felt nice and helped me get through my appointment.

And by the time I go back for my next appointment, things will hopefully be even safer. More and more people are being vaccinated each day. We will all still have to take some precautions for a while, but the risk will be decreasing as the vaccinated population increases. And I’m sure some of the safety things they have been doing at the dentist will continue even when they don’t have to do them because they are becoming common practices (such as using hydrogen peroxide as mouthwash to disinfect before a cleaning).

Hopefully, I will only have to panic about the normal things from now on because now I know how much easier it makes things for me.

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In A Weird Spot With My Workouts (or I Assumed I Would Be Back At OTF Now)

Posted on April 12, 2021 | Comments Off on In A Weird Spot With My Workouts (or I Assumed I Would Be Back At OTF Now)

This past week of workouts was a weird one. I did have a little pain and nausea that I had to deal with at the beginning of the week, but that was tolerable and normal enough for me to deal with. But for a good chunk of the past year, I told myself that I would go back to the workouts at Orangetheory (whether they were in the studio or outdoors) once I was considered fully vaccinated. And as of Sunday the 4th, I’m considered fully vaccinated. Yet, I’m still working out at home.

First, a quick recap on my workouts. I’m still doing the same weightlifting/strength plan that I’ve been doing for a while now. I am making some modifications and adding different exercises from time to time. One great thing about my history with Orangetheory is that I know a lot of different exercises that I’ve done in workouts. So while I don’t have a perfect knowledge of all exercises, I have a lot that I can pull from. So if I don’t feel like doing one type of squats, I know a ton of other squats I can do instead. And I’ve been trying to get through this workout routine in about 30 minutes each time. This isn’t to get it over with, but to make sure I’m moving quickly and not taking a lot of breaks. This way, I can get my heart rate up and get a little cardio in with the weightlifting.

I’m happy enough with this workout plan. It’s not great or perfect, but it’s doable. It allows me to not have to think too much each morning. And not having to plan and think about my workout is something I love about Orangetheory. They do all the planning work and I just have to follow along. And I know that I could do different workout videos that I have saved on a playlist, but I also would have to pick which one to do. So not having to make any decisions before I start is working for me. I do feel a bit stuck, but that feeling isn’t too bad and I think it’s worth having that feeling for the ease I feel sticking with this routine.

But I am very ready to get back to Orangetheory. I miss so much about my classes. I miss feeling like I’m working hard and part of a community. I miss my workout friends (although sadly, some have moved away so they won’t be in class with me when we are all back). I miss the transformation I was feeling in my body. I miss feeling like I’m doing something great for my physical and mental health. So that’s why for so long I said that as soon as I was fully vaccinated I would be back.

Then this week happened and I still wasn’t back.

And honestly, the reasons I’m not back are excuses that I could work through. There are 2 locations that are open not too far away from me that are open. One of them is doing outdoor workouts and one is now in the studio. But they aren’t the studios near my house and the times I’d have to work out would be affected by the drive there and back. I don’t feel like I want to work out at 6am to get a workout in before work. And while I might have to accept one day that I need to do afternoon workouts again, doing an afternoon one at the open studios would mean I would have to deal with rush hour traffic going home. The drive to those locations in normal time would probably be about 15 minutes. In rush hour, it can be over an hour. I could deal with that, but I don’t want to. They haven’t announced when the studio by my house will be opening, but I’m hoping it will be later this month. If it isn’t open soon, then I know I will have to figure out a way to make those workout times work for me.

But I’m also a bit scared to go back. I’ve shared several times before that I know I’m not in the same shape that I was a year ago when things shut down. I understand that this is not the worst thing ever and that a lot of people had the same problem. But I’m still embarrassed and ashamed about this. And when I go back to the workouts, I will have to confront this feeling head-on. It’s easier for me to ignore this when I’m doing my workouts at home because they are different from Orangetheory. But when I’m doing what I used to do, I will be comparing myself to myself a year ago.

And I think I also don’t want to deal with another change right now. If my regular studio was open, I would feel like I was getting back something that I didn’t have the past year. Even though the workout is the same, going to a new studio is different and I’m worried that I might still have the feeling that I’m missing my regular studio and routine. I know this one is a bit of a stupid excuse, but there are so many things we’ve all given up this past year and are hoping to get back. I just want to have my regular studio back. I want my old routine back (even though I know it will have to change because of my new work schedule).

So for now, I’m in a bit of a holding pattern with my plan to go back. I could go back whenever I feel ready. Right now, I’m feeling like that will be when the studio near my house is open. But if that one opens and I still have excuses, then I will need to work through this a lot more. That would mean I’m avoiding things and I don’t want that to be true. But I don’t really feel like I’m avoiding Orangetheory, I just want to have things feel normal and what they were like before.

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This Felt So Normal (or I’ve Missed Having Really Random Friend Hangouts)

Posted on April 9, 2021 | Comments Off on This Felt So Normal (or I’ve Missed Having Really Random Friend Hangouts)

I haven’t had the chance to hang out with friends in person that much over the past year. For most of the past year, I have had to restrict hangouts to be with friends that I know are isolating as much as I am or doing something outside when we feel safe that there wouldn’t be a crowd. But since it felt so risky, even with the options I had, I rarely saw people in person and instead did things over Zoom. And even though the CDC says it’s safe for me to hang out with a friend since I’m fully vaccinated (and some of my friends are starting to be vaccinated too), I’m still being very cautious. I’m trying to ease my way back into normal life, but I’m hesitant too. But I’m really trying.

And a big part of trying is planning more hangouts with friends in person. I’m still being careful with which friends I’m seeing in person, but fortunately, I do have friends who live nearby that I can see that I know are being safe too. So earlier this week, my friend Dani and I planned a hangout. We’ve been able to see each other a few times in person over the past year since she’s one of the few people I know who is being cautious at a similar level as I have been. And most of the time we’ve been hanging out, we say we are going to watch a movie or order in food. Something simple, but something that feels like a treat these days.

So when we decided to hang out this week, that was pretty much our plan. Watch a movie and order some delivery food. But somehow, our evening didn’t go the way we planned and that almost made it better.

When Dani was trying to leave her place to come over, there was some police activity on her street. There was no way for her to leave. This was something serious, but at the same time, it made me laugh because it was so crazy and something that somehow felt like it was exactly like how some of our adventures in the past have started. Everything was ok and she was able to leave, but I think it started the evening off on a weird note and that just continued.

When she got to my house, we were going to figure out what movie to watch but also spent time catching up on our lives. Both of us had things to update the other on, and I randomly remembered something while we were talking. I have started to watch things on TikTok. They are random and weird at times, but I’ve been enjoying them too. Sometimes I learn something really cool, but for the most part, it’s just entertainment. And there was something on TikTok the night before that reminded me of Dani. It was this toy called Mini Brands, which had perfect miniatures of brand-name grocery products. The way you purchased them, what you got was a mystery. So collecting all the different items was something a lot of people were into. I had a feeling Dani would like seeing them, and I was right! And then we decided we needed to find some!

We found that they were available at Target, so she ordered a few online and said that we’d go to Target to pick them up. While waiting for the Target order to be ready, we ordered in dinner (we got dinner from one restaurant and dessert from another, which felt really fancy). And she got the notification from Target right when we were done eating, so we got into my car to head over there.

On the drive home, we were talking about what items we hoped would be inside. Neither of us knew what all the options were, so we were guessing a lot of random things. And as soon as we were back at my house, Dani opened everything up. Fortunately, there was a checklist in there so I was able to check off each one that she got and we could make better guesses about what else might be in there.

Opening up mystery mini grocery items sounds really odd, but honestly it was so much fun. And it was beyond random and weird, but that’s something I haven’t gotten to do in a long time. I miss having a plan to do something and it turn into something totally different but equally awesome. I miss having something outside the norm happening in my life. So often I’ve had random adventures and I didn’t realize until the other day how normal the randomness became in my life in the past. I’ve missed so much over the past year, and this was something I didn’t realize I was missing until I got to experience it again. But it made me so happy.

All of the mini things that Dani got were super cute, and she only got 2 duplicates. And somehow a lot of the things we were randomly guessing she’d get were things that she ended up getting!

We kept saying how these were so pointless but so amazing, and I think that’s the best description of them. But these amazing pointless things also brought us both so much joy, so I think that makes them totally worth it!

Even though the original plan was to watch a movie, we didn’t end up watching anything. We were busy being silly with the Mini Brand things and just talking and hanging out. But it was exactly what I needed. For a lot of the hangouts I’ve had over the past year, they have almost felt like an event. They were for something specific that felt special or I had to do things to be prepared first. But this hangout was so normal and casual. As much as I need more in-person hangouts with friends, I need them to be random nights like this one was just as much. I need hanging out with others to not feel like a big deal. It’s something normal to do and I need to be back in that mindset.

I do have a few more things planned with friends that are a bit more of event type hangouts, but this random hangout has also motivated me to continue to find out who else I can hang out with so I can have more normal friend time like this.

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Default ThumbnailSeeing Friends In Random Places (or Unscheduled Hangouts) Default ThumbnailGetting Back To Normal (or Friend Hangouts And Doctor Appointments) Default ThumbnailA Random Brunch With A Friend (or So Many Pancakes) Default ThumbnailRemembering To Have Some Fun (or Hangouts Don’t Always Have To Be Events) Default ThumbnailSuch An LA Night (or Just Having Some Fun With A Friend) Default ThumbnailRemembering To See My Friends (or Actually Scheduling Hangouts)

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It’s SAG Awards Time! (or I Still Love Watching To See Who Wins)

Posted on April 8, 2021 | Comments Off on It’s SAG Awards Time! (or I Still Love Watching To See Who Wins)

The SAG Awards is one of the award shows I look forward to the most each year. It’s the one award show that I get to have a real hand in selecting the winners. I love getting to vote for all the different categories. And I do take voting seriously. I watch all the movies and shows that I can (I can’t always watch everything, but I try my best) and I pick based on the performances and not just wanting to see someone win. And I love watching the show because it feels much more connected to me than other award shows.

But this year, like so many things, the show had to be a bit different. I think all the award shows have been trying different things to see what is going to work and seem like the same show they had before. And I have to say, I love what the SAG Awards did.

Many shows seem to be doing something as close to normal as possible and having all the nominees appearing on Zoom so they can give their speech on live tv. And the run time for the award shows has been similar to what they were when everyone was in a space together. But the SAG Awards almost honored that we are in a different time by not trying to make it seem like a slightly different version of normal.

The show was only an hour long. All the award announcements were pre-taped so they didn’t have to worry about technical difficulties during a live broadcast. They did have all the nominees on Zoom like other shows have, and that helped it seem like each category was celebrating the winner together. It was fun to see these different little communities for each award and watching everyone as a group. And between each award presentation, they had these fun interviews with different actors about things that I think most SAG-AFTRA members could relate to. I don’t know if people outside of the industry enjoyed those segments as much as actors did, but I found them amazing. I especially loved seeing the one where the actors were talking about the random special skills listed on their resume and which ones were real and which ones they put on there and hoped they were never asked about.

The only negative thing for me about the SAG Awards this year was something that was my fault. This year, I didn’t watch that many of the nominated films. I watched so few that I actually didn’t vote for the winners. I didn’t feel like it was fair for me to vote when I didn’t really know if the performances I liked were the best of all the options. And I didn’t really have a good reason not to watch the screeners I got. I had the time, I just didn’t have the motivation. And maybe it was because I also am missing going to a movie theater to watch movies. While I love watching movies at home, it’s usually because that feels so different from what I normally do. But now, all movies are being watched on my tv. So I don’t feel the same way about feeling lucky to watch the screeners I got.

I’m so glad that even though I didn’t watch all the movies this year, I still loved watching the SAG Awards. It makes me so happy to see actors celebrating actors and I feel very lucky that I get to be a part of it. And I loved seeing what the producers of the show were able to do to make it feel special and unique even if it couldn’t be the way we are used to watching award shows. Hopefully, by next year things will be able to be done the way we are familiar with and everyone will be celebrating the winners together.

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Default ThumbnailA Night Of SAG Awards (or Watching Union Unity) Default ThumbnailSAG Awards (or Watching After Knowing The Winners) Default ThumbnailEnjoying Movie Nights (or Watching My Screeners) Default ThumbnailThe SAG Awards (or I Am An Actor) Default ThumbnailBeing An Active And Interactive Viewer (or SAG Awards Live-Tweeting) Default ThumbnailEnjoying The Emmys (or This Awards Show Will Be A Bit Of A Time Capsule)

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A Santa Barbara Friend Hangout (or Meeting Another Baby)

Posted on April 7, 2021 | Comments Off on A Santa Barbara Friend Hangout (or Meeting Another Baby)

The main reason I went up to Santa Barbara this past Saturday was for family stuff. And that’s usually the reason I go up there. Over the past year, I’ve gotten used to driving up to Santa Barbara for the day and heading back home the same day. It’s not too long of a drive, and it’s shorter than the times I drove to San Diego just for the day. It’s pretty easy for me to do and I usually have a lot of podcasts saved up for my drive. But this Saturday, I had something else to do before I drove home.

My friend Rayshell has had a lot of changes over the past year. She and her husband bought their first place and they had a baby! And because of the pandemic, I haven’t had the chance to see her for a long time. Her new place is on the way to or from Santa Barbara, so we made plans that I would see her either that morning or evening. But then, Rayshell realized that she would be at her parents’ house in Santa Barbara the same day and asked if I wanted to come to hang out in the backyard with her. Of course I said yes!

Her parents’ house was only about a mile away from the rental house my parents were staying at, so it was really easy to get there after I was done with family time. And even though I was pretty much considered fully vaccinated, we still took precautions while hanging out. We stayed outdoors the entire time and I was sitting a little further away (it was easily more than 6 feet away). Even though we’ve been doing all this for a year, it is still weird not being able to hug a friend and have to sit further from them than I’m used to. But at the same time, I’m so grateful I have the opportunity at all to see friends! And especially getting to see Rayshell and her baby (and her husband and parents who were hanging out with us too)!

And it was such a great time! Of course, we had a lot of our usual catchup chat like we always did at our happy hour hangouts. But we both had so much to update each other on. I loved hearing all about her baby, and he was so smiley and adorable the entire time I was there. He was not shy even though he had never met me before. He was a little social butterfly and one of the happiest babies I’ve ever met. I wasn’t able to hold him, but just getting to see him always smiling at me made me so happy. And it was amazing seeing Rayshell as a mom. I knew she’d be an awesome mom, and seeing her with her son proved me right. She looked like a natural!

And Rayshell also updated me about her new place. They haven’t really been able to have anyone over since they bought it right before the pandemic hit, but I hope that I’ll get a chance to see it soon. It sounds like an awesome place for them, even if they moved a little further from me and I wish that she lived closer.

And Rayshell asked me about what’s been happening in my life. I filled her in about what’s going on with work and what has been happening with my family. And she wanted to hear if I had any crazy dating stories, and I did! I have written on here how I haven’t dated that much over the past year, but I have a little bit and I had plenty of stories even about guys that I never ended up meeting. And at least, for the most part, the stories are so ridiculous so even I have to laugh while telling them.

I was able to hang out with Rayshell for almost 2 hours before she needed to start doing her evening routine with her son. And I knew I needed to start heading back home too. I wish we could have hung out longer, but considering that we hadn’t seen each other in over a year, any time I could get was amazing. I’ve said this a lot before, but this past year has made me so grateful for any time I get to spend with the people I care about. And it has shown me how strong some of my friendships are when we can just pick things back up even if it’s been a while since we’ve seen each other.

Hopefully, I will be able to see Rayshell and her baby again soon. I know that it seems like things are getting better, so I’m optimistic about it. I’m still being very careful with what things I take chances on, but being outdoors with social distancing seems pretty safe. And I’m glad that it is finally safe enough for these things to start happening again without anyone having to worry too much about getting sick. And as long as we all continue to be safe and not take too many chances, it won’t be long before we don’t have to worry about any of this.

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Default ThumbnailA Santa Barbara Afternoon (or Celebrating My Future Nephew!) Default ThumbnailAnother Santa Barbara Day (or A Little Bit Of Social Interaction) Default ThumbnailA Bridal Shower Celebration (or My Morning In Santa Barbara) Default ThumbnailSanta Barbara Weekend (or Family and Friends Time) Default ThumbnailA Little More Time In Santa Barbara (or Hanging Out With My Sister-In-Law) Default ThumbnailSanta Barbara Engagement Party (or Sunburn and Rain)

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A Big Family Day! (or A Birthday Party and Meeting Presley)

Posted on April 6, 2021 | Comments Off on A Big Family Day! (or A Birthday Party and Meeting Presley)

This past weekend was my nephew Rory’s first birthday! It’s so crazy to think that it’s already been a year since he was born, but then again it was one of the craziest years of almost anyone’s life with the pandemic. But even with the pandemic, I knew that there would be a small party for Rory to celebrate his birthday. Plus, we had to celebrate my niece Presley being born!

The birthday party was just going to be family. My parents and my sister-in-law’s parents have all been vaccinated. The day of the party was going to be 1 day before I was considered fully vaccinated (which is pretty close to being there). And my brother was vaccinated at the end of last year. So even though we all still have to be careful and cautious, this was a pretty safe gathering since everyone except my sister-in-law and the babies would be vaccinated.

I got to Santa Barbara as Rory was opening his gifts. He got a lot of really adorable things. I got him a set of fabric tents and tunnels that can be used by themselves or combined to make a bunch of different things. He seemed curious about them, but I’m sure the gift will be a bigger hit with him when he’s a little older. I think his favorite gift was the kid cleaning kit that my sister-in-law found for him!

I hadn’t seen Rory in a while, so I had no clue if he’d remember me or not. And he takes some time to warm up to people, so I knew that he might not want me to be super near him. And my guess was correct. He wasn’t upset by me being there, but he didn’t want me to hold him or help him with toys. But that was ok because I had my new niece to hold!

Presley is about 6 weeks old and she’s very tiny! And she stayed asleep almost the entire time I was there, so she was calm and quiet. I think she looks a little like Rory did when he was born. She’s got the same long fingers as Rory, so I wonder if they will both be piano players one day. And I thought she was super cute and adorable. Hopefully, the next time I’m in Santa Barbara she will be a bit more awake and alert. And I can’t wait to see what her little personality will be like.

The birthday party was a very low-key day. After Rory was done opening presents, my brother cooked burgers on the grill and we all ate lunch outside. It was fun getting to hang out with my family and I hadn’t seen my sister-in-law’s parents in a while. I was supposed to see them this past November, but I missed that trip to see everyone since that’s when I got vertigo. I haven’t had a lot of social time with people lately, so any meals I get to have with someone is great. And having it be with family makes it that much better!

And of course, Rory had to have a birthday cake. I joked that he was going to act like their cat and push the cake over the edge of his highchair tray. And that’s exactly what he tried to do! I don’t know if he was trying to get more frosting or what, but it was really silly. And of course, we all took a ton of photos of him with frosting all over his face. The cake wasn’t Cookie Monster themed, but I joked that the photos looked like he ate Cookie Monster.

And of course, I had to get a photo of Rory with my brother and sister-in-law.

After he was done smashing his cake and eating some of it, Rory was having a bit of a sugar crash and it was time for him to take a nap. Since he was going to be sleeping and Presley was still asleep, that pretty much was the end of the party. So I went with my parents over to the rental house they were staying at so I could see Tucker since he was at the house during the party.

Tucker was as silly and goofy as always. He is finally recovered from his knee surgeries, so it was great to see him running and bouncing around without him being in pain. But he also looked a lot older this time because he now has a ton of white fur on his face. It’s like he became an old man overnight! But he still has so much energy and he was so happy to see me there.

I spent some time hanging out with my parents and the dog outside before I headed out. I actually had something else to do that afternoon in Santa Barbara (more about that tomorrow).

I only spent a few hours with my family that day, but it was one of the best days I’ve had in a while. I don’t know how much more often I would be seeing everyone if we didn’t have a pandemic, but this past year has made me appreciate any family time I get at all. And I appreciate having anything to celebrate right now as well. So having 2 things to celebrate with my family really made the day that much better!

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Default ThumbnailI’m An Aunt Again! (or Welcome To The World Presley!) Default ThumbnailMore Family Time (or Seeing All My Immediate Family Last Week) Default ThumbnailI’m Officially An Aunt (or Welcome Rory!) Default ThumbnailHaving Fun With Photos (or My Brother And Nephew Are Twins!) Default ThumbnailFamily Weekend (or Hanging Out With The Dog) Default ThumbnailSanta Barbara Weekend (or Family and Friends Time)

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Pushing In My Home Workouts (or Still Working On My Workout Plan)

Posted on April 5, 2021 | Comments Off on Pushing In My Home Workouts (or Still Working On My Workout Plan)

This past week of workouts was a tough one for me. I already mentioned how I got really sick last week. Because I was feeling ok the next day, I’m pretty sure it was a stomach bug or food poisoning. I’m glad it was over quickly because it was brutal. And I was lucky that it didn’t fully hit me until after I did my Monday workout. But I still had my usual pain and nausea to deal with, and that made all my workouts hard.

I did the same weightlifting routine I’ve been doing for a little bit. It’s not the best workout that I could do, but it is one of the more low-pressure workouts for me. And I didn’t want to overdo things and make myself feel worse. I was trying to push myself in the workouts, but in reality, I was really pushing through just to  do the workout and not give up. I would have loved to have pushed myself to go harder and feel stronger, but this past week was not the week for me to do that.

I also had a slightly different schedule for my workouts. I still had my usual Monday, Wednesday, Friday workouts; but I wasn’t able to work out on Saturday (more on that coming in another post). So I did a workout on Thursday afternoon after I was done with work. And having an afternoon workout in there really made me think more about my workout plan moving forward.

I’m now considered fully vaccinated. This has been a benchmark I’ve been waiting for and I had said that this would be when I went back to Orangetheory. And that technically is still my plan, but it’s not happening exactly how I thought it would.

Right now, there are 2 locations for outdoor workouts. One of them is a bit too far for me to consider going to, and the other isn’t that far but it’s further than I’m used to going. And later this week, there will be 2 studios open for in-studio classes! Just like with the outdoor locations, there is one location a bit too far for me to go to and another that is closer. But the closer studio is still not either of the studios I normally go to. So I have to figure out what is going to work for me with my schedule.

I know I could get used to afternoon workouts again if I had to, but I really don’t like them. And I really like the idea that when I’m done with work that the rest of my day is free time for me. But my new work schedule also makes morning workouts harder for me, especially if I have to drive a bit further. I was looking at the workout schedule and there is a morning workout at 6:30 am, which is much earlier than I’m used to. But even a workout that early might be tough for me to do and still drive home and be ready to log in for work on time. I would hope that there wouldn’t be too much traffic, but that’s a big risk. If it was a 6:30 am class at my normal studio, I would be a bit annoyed that it’s so early, but I wouldn’t question if I could make things work for me.

So I have to decide if it’s worth restarting my membership (which has been frozen since the pandemic started) to do afternoon workouts further from my house or if I should wait a little longer since they hopefully will be opening more studios soon. I might wait it out a week or two and try to do more home workouts in the afternoon to make sure I enjoy them enough. In a way, having a choice to go back makes it a little harder. Before, it was an easy decision for me to do the workouts at home and it was easy to work out at a time that worked for me. But now, I really have to take a look at my schedule and what my options are and see what really is the best option for me now.

I might not be going back to Orangetheory exactly as quickly as I hoped to be, but I know I’ll be there soon enough. It might be another week or two or it might be a month. But that is my big goal to work toward right now. I just have to do a little more planning and then I can make it happen!

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Default ThumbnailDoing More OTF Live (or Easing Back Into More Hard Workouts) Default ThumbnailAn Improving Workout Week (or I Finally Feel Like I Am Seeing The End Of Home Workouts) Default ThumbnailFinishing Up My 2020 Workouts (or Kicking Off A New Year With More Home Workouts) Default ThumbnailMore Proof I Need To Plan My Workouts (or Wasting More Workout Time Than I’d Like) Default ThumbnailI Guess I’ll Be Working Out At Home A Bit Longer (or Working Out Hard Is Always A Good Thing) Default ThumbnailWorking Through The Workouts (Modifications Are Harder At Home)

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