Tag Archives: grandparents

Reflecting Back On Last Year’s Convention (or Photos Bring Back So Many Memories)

Posted on October 13, 2020 | Comments Off on Reflecting Back On Last Year’s Convention (or Photos Bring Back So Many Memories)

I know I’ve written before how sometimes I forget that it’s the anniversary of some important moment in my life until social media reminds me of it with an “on this day” post. Sometimes that reminds me of something good and sometimes it reminds me of something not good. But whatever it is, that post or photo brings back a ton of memories. This time, I almost reverse-engineered that idea. I knew something was coming up and I searched for the photos that would show me the date.

One year ago, my grandma passed away. The one year anniversary of her passing was actually this past Sunday. And I knew exactly what date it was because it was the same night as the National Convention Gala. I know I wrote a little about things in both of those posts, but I didn’t tell the full story of what happened and my memories of it.

I had a feeling my grandma was going to pass away during Convention. There was no reason for me to feel that way, but I did. I knew she wasn’t doing well, but her health had been declining for a while. The first time that I really heard that she might not live that much longer had been last September, but there wasn’t a timeline we were all thinking about. We just knew that she was slipping away and we had to be grateful whenever we could see her. I was hoping that she would make it to Thanksgiving so I could see her one more time, but I knew that it might not happen.

The day she passed away, I spent most of my day doing official Convention stuff. We ended around 5 and then I went to my car to get my clothes to change for the Gala. I changed in a room that was set aside for anyone to get ready in and I walked back to my car to put my day clothes and makeup away. And when I was walking back to the hotel to hang out before the Gala started, I saw a text from my dad. It didn’t say much. It was something like “Text me when you are doing at the Convention”. I think my parents thought that I’d be heading home after things were done, not that I had the Gala. But I knew I couldn’t wait until after the Gala was done. So I found a couch in the lobby and called my dad.

I knew it had to be one of two things. Either my grandma died or something happened with my sister-in-law (she was pregnant with my nephew then). But right before I called my dad, my brother and sister-in-law texted me to let me know they were having a boy, so I knew it was about my grandma. My dad and I didn’t say much on that call. He said that she passed away that afternoon. My grandma was in her room taking a nap after lunchtime and she passed away in her sleep. It was peaceful and that’s all we could have hoped for. I don’t think she was in any pain at the end of her life. I don’t know how aware she was of most things. I’m just grateful that she wasn’t hurting.

After the call with my dad, I was pretty hysterical. A friend of mine saw me, asked what happened, and went to find some tissues for me. He sat with me for a while until I calmed down a bit. The entire night kind of went that way. I randomly cried a lot. People found out what happened and tried to comfort me. I know I could have gone home and skipped the Gala, but I knew that my grandma would have wanted me to be there. And I didn’t want to go home and be alone. I wanted to be around my friends, and that’s exactly what happened at the Gala.

It was a weird night for sure. I was grieving but also trying to have fun. I didn’t want to be crying as much as I did, but sometimes it just hit me really hard. But I was always around a friend and whoever I was around made sure I was doing ok. I was seriously so grateful to my friends that night because I’m sure it was a bit weird for them too. But nobody made me feel bad about being upset or when I needed a shoulder to cry on.

That night was a bit of a blur for me. I know it’s because my brain was processing so much and I was also worried about how the rest of my family was doing. But I tried to enjoy things as much as possible. That’s why I don’t have a lot of photos from the Gala. I didn’t do a red carpet photo because I was still crying so much. I don’t have a lot of photos with my friends because I was not thinking about it. I took some photos of the awards during the Gala, but that’s about it. The only photo I have with my friends was a photo that my friends dragged me into. But I’m so glad they did that because it is one happy memory I have of that night.

And my smile in that photo is real. I was having a good time at that moment. And I’m glad I have that moment to remember that night by. Not all my memories are sad ones, even though that photo does remind me of some sad things too. But it also reminds me that I have amazing friends who were there for me and made sure that I was ok and had a good time at such a weird moment.

I remember so many things when looking at that photo. Even though I have a few other photos from that night, that one, in particular, is the one that brings so many memories back. I looked at it again on Sunday and took some time to remember my grandma. It was a bit of a sad day because of everything else going on in the world. But I’m glad that when she passed away, I didn’t have to be alone and I was able to be supported by so many people.

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Feeling Like Something Is Missing (or I Guess This Is Part Of The Grief Process)

Posted on November 20, 2019 | Comments Off on Feeling Like Something Is Missing (or I Guess This Is Part Of The Grief Process)

Today should be my grandma’s birthday. Her birthday was something that I celebrated with her almost every year because it is so close to Thanksgiving. The tradition in my family used to be celebrating her birthday either the day before or the day after Thanksgiving with a nice dinner out. Those dinners are so clear in my memory because they were such a big tradition. I loved having that extra time to celebrate with my family since we only really get together for Thanksgiving as an extended family.

Both of my grandparents passed away about a month before their birthdays, so I went through this with my grandpa’s death as well. But because I didn’t really celebrate his birthday with him, it didn’t hit me as hard as this is hitting me. I really feel like I’m forgetting to do something and that I will need to somehow catch up. Fortunately, I remembered to turn off the alarm on my calendar to buy my grandma’s birthday card so I didn’t have that alert about a week ago. But I still feel like I should be going to the store to find the perfect card for her.

My grandma loved butterflies so almost every single card I ever got for her had butterflies on them. I tried hard to always find birthday and Mother’s Day cards that were themed with butterflies or had one on there somewhere. It seems like it’s a common thing to find on cards, so I always seemed to be able to find them. Sometimes I would find the perfect card for her birthday months in advance and I’d get it and save it. I know that my grandma loved those cards and cherished them. I don’t know if any of my cousins ever got my grandma the same card, but I’m guessing that since there aren’t a ton of grandma cards with butterflies that it happened at least once.

I missed my grandma’s birthday dinner last year because it was done the night I flew in for Thanksgiving. It was sad to miss that dinner, but I understood why it had to be that night. That felt weird enough for me, but I knew I’d get to spend some time over the next few days with my grandma to make up for it. And she understood why I wasn’t able to fly in earlier for it. I was thinking that maybe this year would be similar to last year and I would just have a feeling of missing out. But it’s harder than that for me.

I’ve shared how grieving the loss of my grandma has been taking me time to get through. I’m not trying to rush myself through the grieving process and I’m allowing myself to take the time I need and not feel weird that it’s not over. There are things that are very different for me with this death compared to other deaths in my life.

When comparing this loss with the loss of my grandpa, I was much closer to my grandma. I knew I could depend on her and it’s a loss not to have that. I also have watched my grandma decline for several years, compared to my grandpa passing away a bit more suddenly. I would think watching someone decline would make it easier to accept, but I think I just assumed she would continue that path for a bit longer. Even though it was hard to watch her become a shadow of who she used to be, there were still moments where I could see the person she was before and it was a nice reminder of who she was when I was little. And I think the way I found out about my grandma’s death has made this a long process. I had to push the sadness away for a few days because I was busy working at the convention.

I’m sure that I’m going to struggle a bit for a little longer. I’m already expecting Thanksgiving to be tough for me and my family. And I’m a bit more prepared now for having random moments of sadness and grief when I can’t figure out what exactly caused it. When I had those last month, they really took me by surprise and I didn’t exactly know what to do with them. Now that I’ve experienced it, I still will be a bit unsure what to do but they won’t be as shocking or surprising.

Being sad on my grandma’s birthday was something I was more prepared for. There are a few other dates in the future that I’m ready to struggle through. But knowing that they are coming doesn’t necessarily make them easier. I just hope that time will help the sadness be a bit less and allow me to celebrate my grandma’s incredible life on those days and not focus on the loss.

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A Big Loss In My Family (or Saying Goodbye To My Grandma)

Posted on October 17, 2019 | Comments Off on A Big Loss In My Family (or Saying Goodbye To My Grandma)

I’ve worked on this post multiple times and I keep deleting and re-writing it. I wish I had an eloquent way to write this, but my words are failing me. As you can probably tell from the title of this post, my grandma passed away.

She passed away peacefully on Friday. I actually found out while at my convention. I had just changed for the gala and was walking back from my car after dropping off my daytime clothes when my dad texted me. The text said to call when I had a break at the convention and I immediately knew that it was going to be about bad news. Several things went through my head, but I called my dad back right away and he let me know that my grandma passed away. My parents thought about waiting to tell me, but they didn’t want me to see it posted on social media or something before they could give me the news.

I immediately burst into tears. I knew my grandma wasn’t doing well and that she was probably going to pass away soon, but I had really hoped that she would make it to Thanksgiving so I could see her one more time. The last time I saw her or talked to her was last Thanksgiving (she wasn’t really able to talk on the phone anymore so I didn’t get to call her over the past year). So I wanted to see her again so I could feel like I had a chance to say goodbye. I hate that I didn’t get that chance, but I also know that my grandma wasn’t really herself for a few months.

I had been having weird dreams for the 2 weeks before her death that she would pass away while I was at the convention. I don’t know why I thought that, but in all my dreams I found out in the middle of convention voting. I never dreamt it would be as I was walking into the gala. I hung up with my dad quickly since I was trying to pull myself together. A friend of mine saw me crying hysterically on a couch and he went to find some tissues for me and sat with me for a little while. And when I went into the gala, I tried to hold it together but there were several times I started crying. I felt so lucky that I was surrounded by friends that night who were able to comfort me a bit. And I remembered during the gala that the purse I was using was one of my grandma’s that she passed down to me, so that made me happy.

I know when my grandpa died I wrote about his life and what he had done. But I can’t do that with remembering my grandma. I was closer to her than I was with my grandpa and everything about her is a memory of something amazing.

I remember being little and thinking my grandma was so glamourous. When she got ready in the morning, she would do her hair and makeup and then wore this mesh thing over her head while she got dressed to make sure her makeup didn’t get smudged. I loved that she did that. She always was protecting her hair and making sure she looked good. I remember when my grandparents went to an amusement park with us and my grandma agreed to go on a water ride because she thought she’d stay dry. Our raft got stuck under a waterfall and she was the only person under the water. She was soaked and we were all laughing so much.

She was also an amazing cook. When they had their house in San Diego, their kitchen always smelled delicious. It seemed like she could make anything and I was lucky that my mom had the same cooking skills. When my mom and grandma cooked together, the food was just that much better.

And my grandma loved playing backgammon. I think everyone in the family learned to play because of her. She was easily the best backgammon player and we joked that she was a witch because she could always roll exactly what she needed. She loved that she was able to kick all of our butts and never went easy on us. She played to win every time and her face lit up as soon as she knew there was no way for her opponent to beat her.

And just like my grandpa, she loved to travel. My grandma went to all 7 continents and loved to explore new places. And I loved traveling with her. I remember when we were on a cruise in Belize and there was a dance contest one night for all the guests. My grandma ended up dancing with the boat captain and she was dancing up a storm! I know we have a video of that somewhere and I’m so glad that I can watch it again one day.

I really wish I could say enough so you all could know how amazing and incredible my grandma was. Losing her was heartbreaking, but at the same time I know she wasn’t doing well for a while so I’m glad she’s no longer a shell of who she used to me. When I saw her a year ago, she wasn’t the same person I remembered most of the time. But every so often, the old grandma would reemerge and she would be who I remembered. Last year, the moment that stuck with me the most was when we were watching old family movies. We were watching a birthday party when I was little and my dad was on the screen. My grandma turned to me and asked me who that was. I told her it was my dad and she turned to look at him sitting on the couch near us. My dad in the video had hair and my dad now is bald. My grandma turned to me and said in a totally serious voice that my dad looked much better when he had hair. It was so funny and made me so happy to get a glimpse of the grandma that I remembered.

I tried to find a nice way to share photos on here, but there are too many that I love and no great way to organize them in this post. So here are some of my favorite photos of my grandma that I had on my computer (I don’t have any of my favorite photos with her from when I was younger).

And this is one of my favorite recent photos with her. I had picked my grandma up from where she was living in San Diego to meet up with my family. She couldn’t find her sunglasses but I had some extra ones in my car. They were much flashier than what she would wear, and my dad took a picture of us because he said my grandma looked so cool. I just love this photo of us.

The last photo I have with my grandma is from last Thanksgiving. We were trying to get a nice family photo and it was difficult. So I told my uncle to set his camera to take a video and I would find a still image that would work as a family photo. But instead of selecting a posed one, I love this candid one of us all and my family seemed to love it too. I’m glad that I have a silly photo of all of us together last year.

I’m going to miss my grandma so much. I don’t know if it’s hit me since I wasn’t expecting to see her until Thanksgiving. I think this Thanksgiving is going to be a tough one, but my grandma would want us to celebrate her and not be sad. She would want us to have fun, be silly, make crazy jokes, and enjoy life. And that’s what I’m going to try hard to do.

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One More San Diego Day (or I Don’t Know When I’ll Be Doing This Again)

Posted on January 23, 2018 | Comments Off on One More San Diego Day (or I Don’t Know When I’ll Be Doing This Again)

This past weekend I did a day trip to San Diego for what will possibly be the last time for a while. My grandma is moving from San Diego to up north where she will be close to my aunt, uncle, and my parents. I’m super excited for my grandma because I think this move will be a really great thing for her. But it’s still a weird feeling that I won’t have any more family in San Diego anymore.

My entire life my grandparents lived in San Diego. They bought their house a year or two before I was born. Then a few years ago they moved to their apartment which was only a few freeway exits further from their house. When my grandpa died, my grandma moved to assisted living but it was in the same building as their apartment. So that move didn’t really feel like a big move. But now she’s doing the biggest move in my lifetime.

On my drive down I was trying to not think about how this was probably the last time I’d be doing this drive for a long time. I’ve been going to San Diego my entire life. And once I moved to LA, I started to do the drive on my own for visits with my grandparents and for Thanksgiving. I would guess that I probably did the drive 3 times a year on average for the last 16 1/2 years. So that’s about 50 times that I’ve done that drive. I have so many random landmarks that I look out for on that drive to help pass the time. And I’ve had a lot of random driving adventures on that drive as well.

I probably won’t be driving to where my grandma is moving to (it’s about a 7 hour drive for me) so I’ll be flying to visit her and for Thanksgiving. In some ways it’s nice to know that I won’t be doing that drive again because it is a bit tiring, but it’s sad to know that I can’t do a day trip to see my grandma and that I will have to do more planning when I want to see her.

For this last trip to San Diego, I went down to help with the prep for my grandma to move. 2 of my aunts where there as well as my parents (and the dog). There were so many people in my grandma’s place that it did get a little crazy in there, but I was just trying to help wherever I could. My dad and I put together boxes and got artwork off the wall. I didn’t really do any of the packing, but I also wasn’t going to be the person unpacking so I wanted to let others do that job. They would know what was in each box so I didn’t want to ruin their planning.

And the main job that I knew that I would have that day would be to be a distraction. While I think my grandma is excited to be closer to family, I think this move is a bit scary and overwhelming for her. We are doing everything we can to make it as easy as possible, but it’s still an unknown for her and I think she still sometimes struggles knowing that it’s just her and not her and my grandpa. But I made sure that my grandma was feeling ok throughout the day. And I joked to her how her only job was to sit back and enjoy us doing all the work.

We got a lot of stuff packed up while I was there. I went back home that evening but there were movers to help move all the heavy stuff the next morning (and there will be movers at the new place to help unload all the heavy stuff). Fortunately, my grandma’s new place will be just about the same size as her current one so we didn’t have to worry about downsizing her things. We’ve done that when they moved from their house to their apartment and then again when my grandma moved from the apartment to where she was living. It was stressful trying to do that and I know it made my grandma emotional deciding what to keep. So I’m glad that we didn’t have to do that part again.

On my drive home, I was a bit sad. I’m so happy for my grandma and I am so glad she won’t be as isolated as she has been in San Diego. But this is the end of something that has been a part of my life for my entire life. I am not someone who moves that often (it’s almost been 8 years since I moved into my house) and my parents still have the house that they got before I was born. So maybe I’m just not used to transitions like this. I do still have some friends who live in San Diego (although normally they come to LA to see me) so I know I’ll be back down there eventually. But for now, I’m saying goodbye to San Diego and closing the chapter of my life that has family living there.

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Girls Day In San Diego (or It Might Be My Last Time Doing This Drive)

Posted on December 20, 2017 | 2 comments

Even though I was just in San Diego for Thanksgiving recently, I was back down there this week. My mom was down with my grandma and I decided to use my day off work to go down to be with them. I don’t usually have time with just my mom and grandma so it was pretty nice to get to do that.

I got down to San Diego just after lunchtime and met my mom at the hotel she was staying at. Right after we got there we headed over to my grandma’s place to spend time with her. She does have some memory issues, but she was having a good day while I was there. We went for a walk to sit outside in the sunshine and when we got back to her place we spent some time looking through photo albums of trips she had done in the past.

My grandma was saying how she didn’t remember going on the trips, but she still enjoyed looking at the photos. And she did remember the people on the trips and some of the specific activities they did.

We spent a few hours with my grandma and then my mom and I had to go back to the hotel. My mom had some business stuff she had to take care of and the person we were working with was meeting us there. But I think my grandma appreciated our visit that day and it helped to break up the routine of her day.

After my mom was done with the business stuff, she and I walked to a restaurant for dinner. It’s not too common for my mom and I to have dinner alone, so that was a nice treat for me. And I thought the sign outside of the restaurant was pretty funny. We went to a brew house for dinner, but neither my mom nor I drink beer. But we technically went to the beer side of the sign.

I thought about spending the night in San Diego because I was originally going to meet a friend of mine who lives down there, but he wasn’t able to meet up with me that evening. So I decided to drive back home. Some people consider it a bit much to do the drive to and from San Diego in a day, but I don’t mind it. Also, I prefer to sleep in my own bed and I knew that I had stuff I needed to do around my house the next day.

The drive to and from San Diego is pretty routine for me. I’ve been doing this since I moved to LA in 2001. My grandparents have lived in San Diego my entire life so I’m just so used to going there to see them. Even when they moved from their house to their new place it was still in San Diego and only a few freeway exits further for me to go. I have the drive down so much that I have landmarks I use to help me figure out how much more I have in my drive. But this might have been the last time I do the drive to see my grandma in San Diego.

Next month, my grandma is moving to be closer to family. Right now, I’m the person geographically closest to her and I’m 2 hours away. I could always go down in an emergency, but I can’t go on a regular basis to visit her. But she is moving somewhere that is minutes from my aunt and uncle and pretty close to my parents too. This way, she can have visits from family more often and we all know that this is going to be the best thing for my grandma.

I’m hoping to be able to go down to San Diego for the day to help pack up my grandma’s stuff when my family is there, but as of right now I’m scheduled to work that day. I’m hoping to get the day off so I can help, but it depends if someone else can cover the time that I’ll be missing. It might be very last-minute that I find out that I can go that day so I’m not really planning on it.

So if I don’t go down to help pack things up, I’ve just had my last day trip to San Diego to see my grandma. It’s so weird to think that could be true since I’ve done it so many times. I do have friends down there so I might still go down from time to time to see them, but it’s different from going there to be with family. I also know that when my grandma isn’t in San Diego I won’t necessarily see my parents as often as I see them whenever they come down to see her.

Those are all very selfish thoughts when I know that my grandma is going to benefit so much from the move. But it is a sad thought to think about something that I have done for so long isn’t really going to be a thing for me anymore. But that just means I’ll have to go up to Northern California to see everyone and I’m ok with that!

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Happy Birthday Grandma! (or Double Birthday Celebrations)

Posted on November 24, 2017 | Comments Off on Happy Birthday Grandma! (or Double Birthday Celebrations)

When my family gets together for Thanksgiving, we also celebrate my grandma’s birthday. Her birthday is usually the week of Thanksgiving and the tradition in the past was to go out to celebrate the day after Thanksgiving for a fun celebratory meal. More recently, we changed the tradition to be the day before Thanksgiving so the day after could be leftover day.

This year, my grandma’s birthday was the day before I got to San Diego so I missed the celebration on her actual birthday. But plenty of my family was there and my mom cooked a steak dinner for everyone. My mom is such a good cook and I wish I had been there for dinner (but fortunately my mom saved me some leftovers for when I got there the next day).

I’m sad that I wasn’t able to be there, but it would have been a bit difficult for me to get there a day earlier. And I know that I can’t always be at everything that I want to be at. But I’m glad that my grandma seemed to have a great time and that she was able to celebrate turning 90 with lots of family with her.

But we did have our traditional day before Thanksgiving birthday celebration for my grandma. We went to an Italian restaurant that we’ve gone to a bunch of times in the past for her birthday. It works out well being there because there’s a private room that we can have (we had 14 of us in the group this time) and my cousin’s kids can run around a bit without worrying about other people in the restaurant. And it works out well for us to have our own room since we all move around so much and I’m sure we’d annoy other people in the restaurant.

The room is nice to have but the table always seems too big for the group. There is a lot of wasted space in the middle of the table so it can be tough to talk to everyone there. But since we moved around a lot during dinner everyone was able to talk to each other. And since this was my first chance to see some of my family on this trip, it was nice to get to have time to chat and catch up. And I knew that I would be spending a lot of time with everyone the next day so if I didn’t get to catch up with them as much as I would have liked, I wasn’t too worried about it.

The dinner is always good, but that’s not the highlight of the meal. It’s always seeing everyone having a good time and talking around the table. And while my grandma has difficulty hearing and couldn’t always participate in the conversation, she looked happy seeing everyone together. But we all did take time one at a time to go over to my grandma and talk to her. It’s easier for her to have a conversation with one person and she seemed to like having time with each person who was there.

I’m sure we were a pretty loud and crazy group, but that’s why the private room works out perfectly for us. And then when the waiter brought out a dessert for my grandma with a candle in it, we could sing as loudly as we wanted to!

It was so great to see my grandma so happy and enjoying herself. I know how important any time I get to spend with her is and I try to take advantage of it the best that I can.

Turning 90 is a big accomplishment and I’m glad we were able to celebrate my grandma’s birthday twice. And while I was only able to be there for one of the celebrations, I’m glad that I could be there at all. I know that I’m lucky to be able to travel for this and my work is flexible enough that I don’t have to worry about taking time off.

I’ll do the rest of my Thanksgiving trip recap next week. I hope that you all had a great time doing whatever you decided to do for Thanksgiving and you got to eat some delicious food!

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Celebrating Some Anniversaries (or Remembering Awesome Family Moments)

Posted on September 12, 2017 | Comments Off on Celebrating Some Anniversaries (or Remembering Awesome Family Moments)

This past week had a couple of family anniversaries. I try to remember to celebrate each one when it happens, but things have been a bit crazy lately for me so my mind did slip a bit. But I figure it’s never too late to celebrate.

The first anniversary that happened recently was my grandparent’s anniversary. We don’t necessarily celebrate this anymore since my grandpa died because we don’t want my grandma to be upset. But I still like to remember it because it is a good reminder of how a marriage can last a very long time. I was lucky that I got to celebrate my grandparents’ anniversary with them several times. For their 50th, they took the entire family on an African safari. That still is one of the coolest trips I’ve ever taken. And for their 60th we had a family party up in Portland.

I also got to be there for what would end up being their last anniversary together. It was their 67th anniversary and it was a pretty simple dinner as a family. But even though that anniversary wasn’t a huge celebration, it’s still a good memory because it was such a fun dinner. Obviously at the time we had no way to know that was going to be the last anniversary my grandpa would be alive for, but I’m so grateful that I was there and got to celebrate with them. Also at that anniversary, my grandpa was telling the story of how he met my grandma. We ended up taking a video of that and it’s something that we all are so glad we have forever now.

I think we all wish that my grandparents would have been able to celebrate more anniversaries together. If my grandpa was still alive, this year would have been their 70th anniversary. I’m sure that they would have done something special to celebrate that. It probably wouldn’t have been a trip, but I bet we would have done a family dinner like we did for their 60th. It’s sad that they weren’t able to make it to that milestone, but to know that they made it to 67 years is pretty special. Not everyone has a marriage that lasts that long and it’s proof that you can stay married that long as long as you work at it. And it’s an inspiration for me even though the chances of me getting to 67 years with someone is a long shot (if I got married this year, I’d be 101 during a 67th anniversary).

Also this past weekend was my brother and sister-in-law’s anniversary. This one is awesome because I’m reminded of going to their wedding in Hawaii. I don’t get to take trips that often and going to Hawaii for a week was such a treat. And of course, I love that Krystle is my sister-in-law because she and I have gotten so close. Celebrating their anniversary is cool, but celebrating the day that Krystle officially became my sister is almost more special to me (sorry Ross!).

And they shared a pretty cute photo from their anniversary this past weekend. They both ended up buying each other the same anniversary card. It was not planned at all, but I think it shows how they are meant for each other.

I think that some of my single friends don’t love celebrating other’s anniversaries like I do. Maybe they see it as something that they haven’t achieved yet and they might be jealous. And I can understand that feeling even if I don’t feel it myself. But even with all the craziness I’ve encountered with my online dating, I’m still hopeful that I will find someone one day. So being able to celebrate isn’t something I’m jealous of, it’s something I’m looking forward to having myself in the future.

There are a couple of times a year when family celebrations are bunched up together. My mom’s birthday and my aunt and uncles anniversary are on the same day. My parents’ anniversary, my cousin’s birthday, and my birthday are within a few days of each other. And then there are these two anniversaries only a few days apart. I don’t know if all families have bunches of celebrations like we do, but it’s fun for me. It also makes it a bit easier to remember to celebrate everyone since I’m doing it in batches (except of course this year where I didn’t do things in advance). The next big family celebration will be my grandma’s birthday/Thanksgiving. And it’s crazy to think that November will be here before we know it!

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San Diego Day Trip (or The Backgammon Witch)

Posted on July 19, 2017 | Comments Off on San Diego Day Trip (or The Backgammon Witch)

I was down in San Diego for a day trip not too long ago, but I was able to do another day trip down there this past weekend. I’m glad I’m able to go down there more often because my grandma is in San Diego. She understands that I can’t be there all the time, but I know that she appreciates it when I’m able to get down there too.

This time, my parents were in San Diego for the week visiting my grandma (unlike last time when their trip was for the surgery I was supposed to have) and they had been doing a lot of fun stuff. I couldn’t visit during the week because of my schedule, but I was able to take time off on Saturday so I could spend a few hours down there with everyone.

I’m glad I took the time off work because there were so many accidents on the freeway on the drive down. It usually takes me 2 hours to get there, but this time it was 3 hours. If I hadn’t gotten the time off work, I only would have had an hour or so with my family before I had to go back to LA.

Once I got there, my parents and I went out for lunch. Originally my grandma was possibly going to come with us, but it was easier for her to eat lunch at home. So the 3 of us (plus the dog) went out for a casual lunch at a Greek restaurant just around the corner from where my grandma lives. It was nice getting to catch my parents up on some of the stuff happening in my life and what I’m trying to plan to do coming up. I was hoping to get to Tahoe sometime soon, but I don’t think that will be happening until the winter now.

After our lunch, we headed up to my grandma’s apartment. It was nice to see her at her place since I hadn’t been up there in a while (when I was there last time, I waited in my car while my dad got her). Her apartment is really nice and has some of my favorite pictures of our family on her desk and tv table. And it also has her backgammon set.

My grandparents used to play backgammon every single day. My grandpa would always say that my grandma is a witch because she could always get double sixes or whatever roll she needed at the time she needed it. She would win most of the time and it was so funny seeing my grandpa get frustrated that she always got lucky with the dice.

I don’t know how much backgammon my grandma has played since my grandpa passed away. But my parents had told me that while they’ve been on this trip they have been playing backgammon with her. And it’s like she never stopped playing! She’s just as good as she always has been and she still has all her witch powers. My dad took this photo from the day before I was there of my grandma right after she won a game against my mom.

I love that expression on her face! You can tell how proud she is that she can still kick my mom’s butt in backgammon. And while I was there, my mom and grandma played some more.

This time, my grandma wasn’t as lucky with the dice (and she kept saying how badly she was playing) so my mom was lucky and was able to win a game. But seeing my grandma so happy doing something that I’ve seen her do my entire life made me so happy. My grandparents had taught all their grandkids how to play backgammon, but it’s been a while since I’ve played. But I think I’ll need to brush up on my skills because I have a feeling we will be playing a lot at Thanksgiving this year.

After visiting with my grandma, we went back to the place my parents were staying at. My parents’ friends were going to be coming over to hang out with them and I was going to visit with them as well. A lot of the conversation was about medical stuff (that’s the case a lot of the time around my family) and clearly Tucker was pretty bored by all the talk.

I stayed for about an hour with everyone and then headed out when they were all walking down to the beach. I have a friend who recently moved to San Diego and I was going to have dinner with him and his sister before heading back up to LA. It was a pretty chill dinner and was a nice way to feel like I did have a bit of a mini-vacation with my day trip down to San Diego. Usually I’m down and back so quickly that it doesn’t feel like I did much more than drive a lot.

On my drive back up, I happened to time it out perfectly and was driving past Disneyland just as the fireworks were going off. It was actually a better view from the freeway than what we had by the castle the last time we were there! Seeing the fireworks made me miss Disneyland a bit, but it’s only about another month before I can go back with my pass.

While my trip down to San Diego wasn’t that much longer than the time it took me to drive there and back, it was still a nice break from LA. I don’t think I’ll be down there again before Thanksgiving, but you never know. I’m lucky that it’s not too far for me to get there and that I can easily do it as a day trip.

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San Diego Day (or Some More Family Time)

Posted on May 3, 2017 | 1 comment

When I thought I was having surgery, the plan was to recover in LA with my parents for about a week and then head to San Diego to recover for almost another week. We wanted to make sure that I had enough time with help from my parents before they left (and obviously if I needed help longer we would have figured something out). Once the surgery was cancelled, my parents’ trip stayed the same but I didn’t go with them to San Diego right away. I decided to work so I didn’t have to use up the hours I had banked from work and then just went to San Diego for the day.

I’m pretty used to going to San Diego just for the day. It’s a bit of a drive, but not too unbearable. Plus, this was going to be a great opportunity for me to take my new car on a longer drive for the first time. The drive down was pretty easy (although I’ve figured out some new things that I want to see about getting for my car) and I was at my parents’ rental house right when they wanted me to get there.

As soon as I arrived, my dad and I went to get my grandma from her place. It’s much easier for her to get into my car than my mom’s since mine is lower to the ground. Plus that gave me extra time with my grandma. When we got her in my car and started to drive to the rental house, she realized that she left her sunglasses in her walker which was in my trunk. Fortunately, I have some random sunglasses in my car for just this occasion. I handed a pair to my grandma and I think she looked pretty amazing in the red sunglasses I had!

Once we got back to the rental house, most of the time we spent as a family was watching old home movies. My mom has turned most of our home movies into DVDs and it’s pretty fun to watch them. A lot of them are from family vacations and I’m glad that we have the videos since I was a teenager and don’t remember the trips as well as I’d like to. But I do still remember some of the really random moments from the trips like when we were in the amazon 17 years ago and I caught a piranha.

I posted that photo online and some of my friends commented that I look the same, but I think I look much older now. Or maybe I just looked really old when I was 16/17!

And as usual when I go down to San Diego to be with my family, my mom cooked an amazing dinner for us. There was a nice little outdoor eating area at the rental house and it was perfect weather for all of us to sit outside and enjoy a relaxing and delicious dinner.

And I know that my grandma really appreciates me coming to visit, even if it is only for a few hours. She seemed so happy with us all being together and I know that she had a great time. I thought maybe seeing some of the home movies would make her sad because my grandpa is in them, but that didn’t bother her. She didn’t remember everything that we did for each trip, but when there was stuff she did remember she seemed to light up and have funny stories to share about that part of the trip.

I didn’t get to spent too much time in San Diego because I had to be back in LA at a reasonable hour. I ended up spending about 5 hours there (and the total drive time round trip was about 4 hours), but it was totally worth it. I don’t get to see my grandma that often and I know I need to see her more. If I hadn’t gone to San Diego this time, I don’t know when I would have seen her again. Maybe at Thanksgiving but the last time I saw her was Thanksgiving and I would hate for an entire year to pass without a visit.

I know I need to make more of an effort to go to San Diego to see my grandma. It’s not that bad of a trip and just going out to lunch or dinner with her seems to make a huge difference in her day. I just need to work out when I can get down there again before Thanksgiving!

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A Day In San Diego (or Celebrating An Anniversary And A Birthday)

Posted on August 11, 2016 | Comments Off on A Day In San Diego (or Celebrating An Anniversary And A Birthday)

Even though I was out pretty late this past Saturday night, I got up early on Sunday morning so I could head out for the day. My parents were down in San Diego visiting my grandma and this past Sunday was their 34th anniversary! So since they were so close to me, I drove down so I could spend the day with them (and with my grandma and aunt).

Growing up, it was pretty cool that my parents’ anniversary was only 2 days before my birthday because we could celebrate them together or back to back. But I don’t think I’ve seen my parents on their anniversary since I moved to LA so this was a pretty special treat! Plus, as I joked to them, we all saved money on stamps not having to mail cards to each other.

My drive down was pretty uneventful (thankfully) and I got there just around lunch time. My parents had found an apartment to rent for the weekend so we had a nice place to hang out for the day. It was pretty close to where my grandma lives so my aunt was going to pick her up and bring her over to be with us. But before they got there, I got some time with my parents and the dog.

I know I just saw my parents 2 weeks ago, but it was really nice getting to see them. And I hadn’t seen Tucker since April and he seems to have gotten bigger since then! My grandma and aunt were supposed to arrive about 30 minutes after I got there, so my parents and I went for a walk in the neighborhood where they were staying so I could stretch my legs and the dog could get some energy out.

Tucker

It was a nice day for a walk and I loved being right next to the ocean. And of course Tucker loved getting to check out all the other dogs that were out on their lunchtime walk.

Right after we got back to where my parents were staying, my grandma and aunt showed up. We all hung out outside enjoying some food (I brought leftovers from the night before) and catching up with each other. I hadn’t seen my grandma or aunt for a while, so it was good to get to see them again (I won’t see either again until Thanksgiving but that’s not too long from now).

We all gave my parents their anniversary cards and they opened them and shared them with everyone. My parents do homemade cards for each other and we got to see what cards they made this year. And then I opened my birthday cards (I only opened the ones from my parents, grandma, and aunt since I didn’t bring the others with me) and shared them with everyone as well.

After opening cards (and thanking my grandma for my birthday check that will help me fix some more stuff on my car), we just spent the afternoon relaxing and enjoying time as a family together. I’ve really come to appreciate the quiet time I get to spend with my family since so many times when we are together it is for an event and things are a bit crazy and hectic. Just being with each other is a nice change.

My mom cooked dinner that night (it’s easy and usually better than going out) and we had a pretty early dinner since my parents knew I didn’t want to drive back too late. My dad, aunt, and I discussed how we might have even more family joining us this year for our Thanksgiving morning workout at Orangetheory and we are pretty excited about that. It should be a fun workout (as always) and I’m so happy that we started this new tradition with the family.

After dinner we spent a little bit more time together and then it was time for my aunt to drive my grandma back home. After they left, I stuck around a bit longer because my parents were giving me their leftovers from what they had cooked that weekend in San Diego (I’ve been eating their leftovers all week!). They also had some stuff for me to take back home (mainly donations to take to My Friends Place) so they helped me pack up my car.

I should be seeing my parents again in October (I’m hoping to make it to Tahoe since it’s been a while since I’ve been out there) so it’s not going to be too long before I get to hang out with them again. And as I said, Thanksgiving is coming quickly and I know I’ll be with them for a few days then as well.

Overall, I’m so happy that my parents just happened to be in San Diego on their anniversary so I got to spend the day with them. It was a nice way to spend the day and since I’m used to driving to San Diego just for the day, it wasn’t bad to drive down and back within a few hours. And even though it wasn’t my birthday, it still felt like I got to celebrate my birthday with them which is something that hasn’t happened since I turned 18. Hopefully we can celebrate their anniversary and my birthday together before another 15 years pass.

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