About a year ago, I wrote a post about a friend who I had to force to get help because I felt they were a danger to themselves. That night was one of the most terrifying nights of my life. I have shared a lot of what happened with my friend because he doesn’t remember much about it (which I’m grateful for because I said some harsh things to him to force him to get help). When I wrote that post a year ago, I had no idea what my relationship would be like with my friend. Now, I’m so grateful that it hasn’t changed. If anything, we have gotten closer.
That night will stick out in my mind for so many things. I feared what would happen if my friend didn’t listen to me. I had threatened to call the police to get him if he didn’t go to a hospital, but I was so worried he would drive somewhere else and I couldn’t call for help for him. I didn’t think he would do anything to hurt himself while he was in the car, but I was still scared he would get in an accident because he was acting very irrational. I had no clue if my friend would talk to me again but I had to realize I was willing to sacrifice our friendship if that meant his life would be saved.
But some positives came out of that night. First of all, my friend got the help he needed. He has told me since that night that his doctors believe he might have harmed himself that night, so he needed to get help and he did. He has done some amazing work with his doctors and in therapy in the past year and I’m so glad that he has taken those steps. If that horrible night was what needed to happen for him to get the help and medical care he needed, that’s a good thing. I also witnessed so many friends coming together to help, both that night and for the days after it. We pulled together to help our friend with things like moving his car to a place where it won’t be towed, picking him up when he was coming home, making sure he had things he needed, and looking into options for paying for his medical bills.
My friend has also become much more open regarding this since this happened a year ago. I think that’s a good thing because more people can learn from what he has gone through and that can support him if they are going through something similar. I’ve shared on here several things that I battle with, and I have only seen positive things from being open. I hope that that’s what my friend is experiencing as well. From what I’ve seen, he has only gotten good things from his openness.
I know that my friend has been a bit anxious about this anniversary and I can understand that. He has gone through so much in the past year and I have only seen a fraction of it. I have tried to remind him that this is also an anniversary of him getting help and starting a new phase of his life. I’m sure he is remembering things from before and it’s not always easy to see the difference in your own life sometimes, but I see the difference. I know he isn’t the same person he was a year ago. I don’t worry about him the way I used to because I know he is in a much better headspace than he was before. I know that he is more comfortable reaching out and asking for help if he needs it. He has more resources than he had before and can manage things differently. I’ve only seen positive changes in him and that makes me hopeful that things are just going to continue to get better.
A year ago, I had no clue what would happen or if my friend would be ok. I’m so glad that things turned out the best that they could. I know that not everything is perfect, but they are being worked on. And seeing all these positive changes in my friend makes me feel better about forcing him to get help because that was something I really did struggle with. But now, there’s no question that it was the right thing to do and I hope that anyone who knows of someone who is at serious risk of harming themselves would do the same. It’s not easy to do, but it was the right thing to do.
And if you are struggling and want help, there are many resources out there. Going to an emergency room is an option if you don’t feel safe. They will help you and make sure that you are safe or get the help that you need. But I know that some people can’t or won’t do that for a variety of reasons. So if you don’t want to do that or are not sure if you need help, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. There are available 24/7 and can offer resources or just be someone to listen to you. Getting help isn’t easy, but hopefully, you will see the good that comes out of it by hearing a little bit of what my friend accomplished since he got help.
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