I never understood how annoying recovery from vertigo could be until now. Then again, I never experienced vertigo that lasted more than a few hours before. Recovery before was pretty quick. Whenever vertigo ended, it was over. Usually, that was almost like a light switch. One moment I had it and the next I didn’t. Rarely, I would feel vertigo lessen over the course of a few minutes or an hour. But it still ended quickly and I felt like myself again before I knew it.
This time, it’s been a long and annoying recovery. I don’t feel like I’m over it at all. I’m doing significantly better, but I still am dizzy a lot during the day. When I wake up in the morning, I have had some of the worst vertigo of the day. It’s a bit scary because I’m worried that I have had a setback and that the day was going to be really bad. But I’m grateful it hasn’t been like that. But just because I’m not having a setback doesn’t mean I’m having amazing progress. The progress is slow and frustrating. My mind wants to do so much and my body just can’t.
I’m continuing to take it easy when I can. I am cautious when I’m walking because I know I might need to hold on to a wall. I do a lot of sitting and laying down during the day. I will nap if I need to because I know that it’s not a bad thing. But taking it easy is never something that I have done well. I usually push myself a lot and want to challenge myself. I guess vertigo is teaching me to be gentle and slow down, but I also want to make sure I’m not wasting my days when I’m finally doing better.
But because of how dizzy I am still getting, what I can do each day is limited. So for the past few days, I’ve been doing things that I can do while sitting down. I have done some cooking while sitting (which isn’t easy and not something I’m doing a lot). I’ve reorganized my dresser drawers and refolded a lot of my workout and athleisure clothes while sitting in front of the drawer. And I’m starting to work on cleaning up my file cabinets and seeing what I really need to keep and how I can make my desk a more productive space while sitting.
I’m not usually someone who sits while I do these types of things. I like being able to walk around while working on a project and having different spaces for different piles. But for now, I really don’t want to do that. Even though I probably could do it, it’s easy for me to just sit and I’m not worried about falling while walking. And I’m starting to get used to how weird it feels to be sitting in one spot while doing these things.
I still hope that I stop having vertigo issues soon. I’m so ready to be over it and to get back to doing more things that I want to do. I try to remind myself how much better I’m doing now than I was doing last week, but I also feel like I’m still so far from how I am normally.
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