Being My Own Advocate (or Sometimes It’s Too Much)

I hope you all had a great Halloween yesterday (and aren’t too tired/hungover/sugarcrashed at school or work). I’ll write about my Halloween fun soon, but first I want to share a situation that I’ve been dealing with at my day job.

This has been going on for a year now, and I’ve only recently had the courage to speak up about it. There is one co-worker who honestly hates me. I’m her biggest enemy. I didn’t do anything to cause this. This particular person has always picked one person to be their enemy every time she worked. She didn’t start working until around October last year, so for the first few months of my job I didn’t have this.

Her hatred toward me as been seen in many forms. She refused to speak to me or acknowledge my existence unless necessary. That I can deal with. She mumbles under her breath about me every time I talk. That was ok for a while too. She used to work at the desk next to me and when she did it was a lot worse. But her desk was moved and it seemed to get better.

But in the month or two prior to our unemployment and then once we got back, things have been getting worse and worse. What made me snap was on Wednesday she said to me, “You are a piece of s%*t and should be hospitalized”.

At that point, I realized that I needed to speak up. My boss has known since the beginning that this person didn’t like me and that they were not particularly nice to be. But it was played off as it was her typical behavior (my boss has seen her do this with other people in the past). But it had been getting to me for a long time. It is a big reason why I’m not happy at my job. I just didn’t want to talk about it because it seemed silly.

But finally it became clear to me. I shouldn’t have to deal with this.

And sadly, this isn’t the first time I’ve had people I work with who treat me like this. At my last job, my supervisor called me fat and undateable. When I complained to my supervisor’s boss and HR, it was almost laughed off. I also worked for an orthodontist in 2006 who was extremely rude to me and called me a brat.

You’d think that I’d learn not to put up with this anymore, but part of it comes from my fear of losing my job. I don’t want to speak up or complain because it’s so incredibly hard to find work. Even harder to find actor-friendly jobs. So I don’t want to put a job at risk by speaking out.

I did talk with my boss about this co-worker. He said that he had a serious talk with her and told her that if it happened again she would be fired. Yesterday it was ok. But I still shouldn’t have to work somewhere where I know somebody hates me. I know I’ve said this a million times, but I’m more serious than ever about finding a new job. An ex-boss of mine (who is a friend) let me know about an opening at her company. I’ll be emailing my resume later today.

What it comes down to is that I know that unless this co-worker leaves, I will never be truly happy at this job. There will always be an air of hostility and hatred. And since it is the fact that I work there that makes this person so angry, I need to take myself out of there. I need to look out for myself.

So, I’m putting this out there in case any readers know of any actor-friendly day jobs in LA (or work from home). I’d appreciate any help I can get. The sooner I can leave my job, the sooner that I can start being happier again.

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Should I Stay Or Should I Go? (or More Day Job Issues) Thinking I’m Good Enough (or Not Freaking Out Over An Email) It’s Always Unexpected (or Sending Positive Energy To A Co-Worker) A Quick Post (or I Really Hope I’m Not Getting Sick) Yup, I’m Sick (or Trying To Take Care Of Me) Sometimes It’s Not About Me (or Not Freaking Out)