About a year ago, I had my first appointment with a doctor in bariatric medicine. I went into that appointment with a specific concern in mind and really was worried that the doctor would either suggest other options for me that I didn’t want to do or that they would dismiss what I had to say. I was shocked when I was at that appointment and it went exactly how I hoped it would. I was terrified to start a medication that I would have to inject into myself, but I was also really hopeful for what it could mean for me and my future.
It hasn’t been an easy year and I knew this medication wouldn’t be a miracle for me and that I would still have to work at losing weight and there may be some tough side effects to get through. I also had to overcome my issues with needles and I knew that would be a big challenge. My first few injections were pretty bad for me. I did pass out with them in the beginning, but I took measures to make sure that I was safe such as doing them while laying down so I couldn’t get hurt when I passed out. I had a lot of bad side effects from the beginning that I had to learn how to manage. Some of these side effects disappeared after a few weeks or after I had a bit of time at a new dosage. A lot of these side effects are still things I have to deal with now. But after a year, I have gotten used to many of them and they aren’t all as bad as they were when I started.
The main side effect I still deal with almost weekly is nausea. This is something that can vary each week, and I think there are a lot of factors that make things better or worse for me. I know I don’t inject the medication in the exact same spot on each side each time, and I feel like some spots are better for me than others. I just haven’t figured out the pattern of what are the good spots to use so I just have to see how I feel each week. And when I’m dealing with other nausea, the nausea I have as a side effect is amplified. It’s not ideal, but considering the good that I’m getting out of this medication, it’s worth it.
And I have been getting good out of it. I’m not losing weight at the same rate that I was at the beginning, and that’s a bit hard to accept. But I’m still losing weight. I don’t know why it’s as slow as it is now (sometimes it’s only half a pound a month), but I’m glad things are going in the right direction. And based on what this medication is supposed to help with, I have hit the goal percentage of weight loss already. That doesn’t mean I’m stopping, but I know that I’m considered a success story with how things have gone for me.
But beyond weight loss, the best thing for me has been my relationship with food. It’s so hard to explain food noise to someone who hasn’t dealt with it before, but it’s almost like an obsession with food even if you are eating healthy or the right portions. You can wake up and spend your morning planning your meals for the day to make sure it’s exactly what you want. Now, I still have some of those feelings and thoughts but they aren’t as often or as overwhelming. I don’t necessarily think about what I want to have for dinner until it’s almost time to eat. I do have to remember to eat occasionally, especially at lunchtime, but it’s nice to not have food such a focus in my mind.
I know that this medication is controversial and some people don’t believe that people should take it for weight loss, but I’m so grateful that I have been allowed to do so. I haven’t changed many of my food or exercise habits in this past year, but the way that my body is reacting is different. I have known for a while that the simple concept of calories in calories out hasn’t really worked for me. Even when I’m tracking things perfectly, my body doesn’t react the way it should. But now, things seem to be more aligned with what is considered normal. I also know that not everyone would agree that the side effects I’ve been dealing with have been worth it, but that’s a personal decision and some people will be ok with certain side effects more than others. I’m glad that I have been ok with the few negatives that I’ve experienced because this isn’t a short-term plan. I don’t know if I’ll be on this forever, but maybe I will and I’ve had to be ok with that.
It’s been a bit of a crazy year between side effects, medication shortages, positive progress, overcoming my issues with needles, and everything else that I have gone through. But I’m in such a better place than I was a year ago and I’m hoping that things will continue in the right direction for me in the next year and I’ll still be happy with how things look a year from now.
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