There is no debate that our country (and a lot of the world) is hurting right now. There have been protests that were peaceful (and some horrible people took advantage of and made violent). There have been curfews in Los Angeles because of this. And while the murder of George Floyd was what people were protesting, it was not just because of that murder that people were upset.
Police brutality, especially against black Americans, is unfortunately not a new issue. Just in the recent past, we have multiple instances of this. There was the shooting of Breonna Taylor, who was sleeping at home when police burst into their home and her boyfriend reacted as if someone was breaking in. The police were not in uniform and did not knock or announce themselves. I can’t imagine why anyone would assume someone breaking into their home would be police and not a criminal. Her boyfriend shot to defend them and their home. And the police shot back and killed her. I have heard that they weren’t even at the correct home when the police barged in. And the person they were looking for was already detained. Her death was so senseless and unnecessary.
The murder of George Floyd was just heartbreaking. I have seen the video, and I feel horrible that I watched it. Someone’s death should not be used as a learning tool. But I have also seen the videos of him before the police were kneeling on his neck, cutting off his air supply. He was already in handcuffs. He was not fighting. He wasn’t happy about being taken away in handcuffs, but he was not a threat. And the officer that was kneeling on him did so for almost 9 minutes. 3 of those minutes were after he was unconscious. That was also unnecessary. And none of the police officers watching this man die said anything. They just stood back and were silent.
I cannot imagine the fear that black Americans feel every day with what the police might do. I am privileged that way. But I have always considered myself an ally and that I try my best to help. But with the protests in the past few days, I have realized that I have not been as good of an ally as I could be.
I was raised in a pretty diverse area. I was raised to not see color. I had friends that were diverse. My parents never thought twice about a friend who didn’t look like me. My high school was even featured in the newspaper for not having a majority of any ethnicity. I took this idea of not seeing color throughout my life. And I have learned how wrong this idea is.
The idea of not seeing color means you don’t see the discrimination or issues of those who might not look like you have. It’s almost the same idea of All Lives Matter (an idea I hate and feel is disgusting). I do beleive that Black Lives Matter is an important movement and have supported them. But I have realized that my privileged place of claiming to not see color is also discounting the issues that others may be experiencing. This wasn’t intentional, but I know that I did it. And I am working on correcting my mindset and I know I have to learn to grow.
I also never gave a thought to the idea of not being racist versus anti-racist. I believe that I am not racist (although I have learned that some of the privileged thoughts that I have could be considered a bit racist, but I’m working on it). And I have always thought that racism is wrong. But I don’t think I have ever been actively anti-racist before. I am working on that now. I am making sure that I am speaking out against racist behavior and not just not acting that way on my own. I am using my voice when and where I can. Being silent is the same as agreeing with the hatred and I will not do that anymore.
And while I cannot donate a lot of money, I made some small donations this week to groups that are helping. Even though my donation alone won’t be enough, if thousands of people gave small donations it adds up and can help make real change.
The groups I donated to were Campaign Zero, The Freedom Fund, White People 4 Black Lives, and the ACLU. I encourage everyone to donate to those groups or the others that are helping the protesters or helping to eliminate police brutality. If you have been watching any of the protests, you have seen how the police have been acting. They have been shooting people with rubber bullets who are not doing anything or at reporters who are doing their job. They have arrested reporters for no reason. They have run over protesters. They have maced people who were walking by. This is despicable behavior and it must be stopped. So many innocent people have been hurt by the police during these protests. The police were not defending themselves, they were acting up. And if they are supposed to be the calm and rational people to defend us, they need to be retrained. Acting rash and attacking citizens who are not doing anything wrong is not what we need. And yes, some criminals do need some stronger force, but that force should not equal death. It’s not a black and white issue of doing nothing or acting at full force with all of their strength. There are so many shades of gray with how police can stop the illegal behavior. And they need to do that more often.
I’m working on being better about using my voice for what I believe in. I know I’m not perfect and I know I have a lot to learn. I have asked some friends of mine who are very involved in activism to call me out if I am not being a good ally because I know they will do it from a place of love. But it is not up to them for me to be better. I need to be in charge of educating myself and making sure I am the person I want to be.
Please, don’t ignore the protesters just because you may disagree with how they are doing it. First, the protesters are typically not the ones looting or causing destruction. The protesters have been begging people not to do that and there are lots of videos showing them stopping it. And for people who say they should be doing more passive protests, that’s what they have been doing for too long. Take kneeling during the national anthem. So many people who said it was wrong and disrespectful to do that are now saying the protesters should have done something that was calmer. That’s what they were doing while kneeling. They were not respected or heard then. So they had to be louder. And now is the time to listen, learn, and speak out.
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