Going Out While Exhausted (or The Opposite Of Fear Of Missing Out)

After all of the ENMNCon excitement, I was hoping to have a bit of a lazy week the next week. Sadly, that wasn’t going to be the case for me. Of course I knew I’d have work to catch up on and errands to do (those few days of ENMNCon seemed to take up my entire time so I didn’t do a lot of housework), but I was hoping to keep my evenings as free as possible.

I knew that there was an event that the podcast I work for was co-sponsoring on Monday evening and I had it on my calendar for a while. And I figured that somehow I wouldn’t be exhausted that evening to attend so I told everyone I would be there.

Of course, Monday comes around and the day is just beyond full for me. I was exhausted from the weekend, I had a workout in the morning, and then a doctor’s appointment in the afternoon. I had every intention of going to the party, but I didn’t think I was going to make it.

After a team phone call with everyone from the podcast (we have those every other week) I realized that everyone else was going to be there and I should try too.

I got out of my junky clothes (I don’t care to dress up to go to the doctor so I wore workout clothes) and put on some jeans and a cute top. I also tried my best to do some makeup and make my hair look better and then headed out the door.

The event was in Chinatown, so it wasn’t too far of a drive for me. I was a bit lost because the venue was on a pedestrian only street and wasn’t sure at first where to park, but I managed to find a meter (it was free at night!) and headed inside.

As soon as I got in, I knew that this was going to be a quick appearance for me. The noise and lights were bothering me and I was so tired that I wasn’t feeling very social.

I saw a bunch of my friends and managed to say hi to them all, but after about 30 minutes I was getting ready to go. Of course, I stayed long enough to be in an awesome photo with the entire podcast team!

IAP Team

As soon as we took the photo, I said my goodbyes to everyone and headed back home. Before I knew it, I was in my pjs on my couch catching up on my DVR (there were a lot of shows I hadn’t had a chance to watch).

I’ve written before about fear of missing out and I was scared that if I hadn’t gone to this party that I would feel that way. But I almost had the opposite reaction. I am glad that I went and said hi to my friends, but I almost regretted spending that time driving there when I knew I wasn’t going to be all in for the event.

It’s hard to say no to social obligations. And because I had told people for a while that I’d be going, I didn’t want to disappoint anyone. But I know that if I hadn’t been there and had explained that I was exhausted from a 3 day conference that people would have totally understood. But I also don’t want to let people down. It’s a struggle of balancing obligations and needs that I need to work out.

And I know that I’m going to have to focus on that struggle a lot over the next few weeks. I’ve got a lot on my plate right now and there are weeks that I’m getting very close to overbooked. I’m going to take some time between things this weekend and take a good look at my schedule. I’m going to have to decline some things that I’ve wanted to go to in order to keep myself sane. I have to focus on what’s most important in my life right now (I’m thinking day jobs, workouts, and doctors appointments) and then add in what else I can when it fits.

Hopefully that focus will allow me to stay rested and at my best self over these next few crazy weeks!

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