Tag Archives: support

The Sorority Nobody Wants To Belong To (or Getting Support From Strangers)

Posted on November 13, 2013 | Comments Off on The Sorority Nobody Wants To Belong To (or Getting Support From Strangers)

I wanted to share another story from the weSPARK 5K this past Sunday.

After the 5K was over, I spent some time at the expo by the finish line. I was having some serious shin splints (I think it was due to the crazy hill) and I wanted to stretch for a bit before I sat in my car to drive home.

I decided to watch the medals being given out to the winners of the 5K and 10K and the top 3 finishers in each age group. They didn’t announce the times for the winners, but I know that they finished extremely quickly.

As I was watching, the woman who got 2nd place in her age group approached me and asked me if I would take a photo of her and her friend. Of course I said yes. The friend of the 2nd place winner (sadly, I never got either of their names) had never done a 5K before this race, so they were both celebrating.

I congratulated them both and then noticed the hats that they both were wearing which said that they were breast cancer survivors. I mentioned to them that my mom is going through treatment for breast cancer, and it was like instantaneously we were friends.

They both asked me what type of cancer and what stage it is. They wanted to know what treatments she’s had already and what treatments she has coming up. And they wanted to know how she was doing. I shared her information with them and they both shared their stories with me.

While I’ve noticed that since I’ve shared my mom’s story with others that people have been sharing their stories with me. There are friends that I never knew had family members with breast cancer who have told me how well their family members have been doing. I know this might sound horrible, but it’s almost like now I’m a member of a secret club or sorority. As soon as someone who has gone through this learns what my family is going through, they take me under their wing.

It’s kind of nice because this is a big unknown for my family and I appreciate getting advice and hearing stories of how well people are doing after cancer.

I know that sometimes it seems like everything is about breast cancer and not about other cancers (and I’ve read plenty of stories about pink items not going to support breast cancer charities). But I appreciate that so many people are willing to share their stories with me and giving me and my family support.

And to the ladies that I spoke to on Sunday, I’m sorry that I didn’t get your names and properly introduce myself. But thank you for sharing your stories with me and for wishing my mom the best.

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Posted in Family, Health, Tough Stuff

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Cancer Questions (or Hopefully This Will Help Someone Else)

Posted on October 2, 2013 | 2 comments

Ever since I posted on here about my mom having breast cancer, I’ve gotten a ton of support. This is so appreciated because my family is going through uncharted waters here. Nobody in our family has had breast cancer before and even though most of my family is in the medical field, there is still a lot of unknown for us.

I’ve also gotten questions from people who want to know more information about what is going on. Some of the things are private, but I want to share a bunch of stuff on here. When my mom was diagnosed, I did a lot of searching online for support and what to expect. I had to be careful where I looked because there is a lot of crazy scary information and I don’t need to become obsessed with what’s out there.

So here are a couple of questions that people have asked me and that I hope will help anyone else going through what my family is going through.

What is my mom’s treatment plan?

My mom had her mastectomy during the summer and is pretty much healed from that. She believes (and I agree with her) that the surgery probably got all of the cancer out of her body. But as a precaution, she is now having chemo. My dad goes with her and since our family dog is a therapy dog, he can go too (I don’t think he has gone yet). She will have a few months of chemo and then finish with some radiation to get rid of any cancer that may be left. I’m so optimistic that this treatment will result in her being 100% cancer free in the end.

Has my mom lost her hair?

As I am typing this, she has not lost her hair. With the type of chemo drugs that she’s getting, she will probably lose it. But she already has an amazing wig and will be wearing that. She actually wore it to my brother’s wedding and I think it looks amazing (she thinks it even looks better than her real hair).

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Am I going to get tested for BRCA (the breast cancer gene)?

This was one of the first things I asked my mom once I stopped crying when she told me she had cancer. I wanted to know if I needed to be tested. As of right now, I’m not being tested. It doesn’t really work like that. First my mom and I are going to take an online class about what it means if you get tested and test positive for the mutation. Then my mom has to meet with a geneticist. After that, my mom gets tested. If she tests positive for the mutation, then she will share that with me and I can decided if I want to get tested (I think that if it comes to this, I will). With my family background being Ashkenazi Jew, I already have a 1 in 4 chance of having this mutation. But if my mom tests negative for the mutation, the chances of me having it are extremely slim so I would not get tested.

Is there anything that people can do to help my family?

This is one of the most common questions people have asked me, and it is one of the most wonderful things that people could ask. As of right now, no, there is nothing that my family needs. My mom is doing amazing and my dad is there to help with anything she needs. If anyone would like to do anything, I ask that you donate to weSPARK. They support people with cancer and their families, and donations help to keep all their programs free of charge. I’m trying to raise $100 before the 5K in November and would love any help you would be willing to give to help me reach that goal.

I hope the answers I’ve given help you understand more of what my mom is going through and see that despite a cancer diagnosis, my mom is kicking as much butt as usual. And if you have a parent with breast cancer and want to chat, feel free to reach out to me. I’m more than happy to connect with people who are in the same boat.

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Mentoring Circle (or Women Who Support Each Other)

Posted on March 22, 2013 | 2 comments

Yesterday I had my first meeting with my Women in Film mentoring circle. This circle consists of two mentors (my mentors are a tv producer and film agent) and 8 mentees.

We met at UTA which is one of the big agencies in town. It was a pretty intimidating building.

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Makes me so grateful that my agents are in a location that is very welcoming and makes me feel like part of the team.

Our group had a lunch in one of the conference rooms, and for this first meeting, we just did introductions. Most of the women in my group are actors, but most of those actors also do something else (like how I produced the documentary). We do also have a writer and director in the group and I’m excited to get to learn from them.

One of the greatest things about this group is how nice and supportive everyone is. I try to be supportive with all my fellow actors out there. When a woman who is my direct competition (I joke that she is my evil twin) needed to know where the audition we both had was going to be, I gave her the info without hesitation. I know some people wouldn’t do that because it increases their chances to book the role, but I know that if I’m meant to book it, I’ll book it.

I’m so used to having to watch out for these ultra-competitve actors (and many of them are rude and try to knock you off your game in the waiting room). It was truly a breath of fresh air knowing that I wouldn’t have to encounter that in this room.

We will be meeting again in about 2 months (the program is designed to have 6 meetings in a year). I’m hoping to connect with some of my fellow mentees on Facebook or twitter because I’d love to be around supportive people more than every other month.

I think in any industry that is competitive, it is such an asset to find people who just want to make sure that everyone gets ahead and nobody gets left behind. I’m so lucky that I was put into a group like this where that is happening.

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