Tag Archives: friends

New Year’s Eve In PJs (or I Think This Is Finally My Last NYE Post)

Posted on January 8, 2019 | Comments Off on New Year’s Eve In PJs (or I Think This Is Finally My Last NYE Post)

I’ve been writing about the new year for forever now! I’ve had a lot that I wanted to cover and I didn’t want to cram things into a single post. I like having the time to allow myself to reflect on the past year and be excited about the year to come. But I think I’m finally at my last post about the new year.

For the past few years, I’ve spent New Year’s Eve with my friends at a party. It was driving home from that party 2 years ago that my car died and I ended up getting a new (used) car. I love going to that party for so many reasons. Of course, I love getting to spend time with my friends. Any opportunities I get to hang out with amazing people is something I want to do. I also love the party because it’s very low-key and casual. I don’t have to dress up or be super social. I just get to hang out with my friends and it’s perfect.

This year, that party wasn’t going to happen. My friends do so many parties all the time, so we all understood they couldn’t host one. Plus, they have a puppy and the dog isn’t really used to be crowds yet. So if they had a party they would have had to board their dog at a dog hotel and they wanted to ring in the new year with their puppy. All completely understandable things.

I had been invited to a few other parties, but I wasn’t really sure if I wanted to go out. I had been feeling a bit lazy and I knew any of the other parties I was invited to would be much less casual than what I was hoping to do. I did message a couple of friends to see if anyone wanted to come over and watch movies and order pizza, but I think everyone was feeling the same as I was. Nobody was really the motivated to leave their house and be social. It was kind of funny that we all felt the same, but it also made it easier when we all decided not to really do much.

So I spent my New Year’s Eve alone at my house. I ordered some food and watched movies on tv. I had been dressed in workout clothes earlier that day for my workout, but after I showered and got dressed I spent the rest of the day in my pjs. I did stay up until midnight, but I was in bed ready to go to sleep when the clock stuck midnight. And pretty soon after that I was asleep.

I know that in the past I probably would have been upset about spending the night alone, especially after asking friends if they wanted to come over. But I was actually very happy and excited about how I spent my night. I could have made an effort and gone to a party, but I really didn’t want to and I wasn’t going to force myself to do that. And I didn’t feel bad that my friends didn’t want to come over because I was doing the same thing to them. This wasn’t anything against me or a reason to think my friends are against me. It was just what it was and there are no feelings about it.

I feel like that is a huge sign of growth. I didn’t overthink things or stress out about why it happened. I knew what I wanted to do with my evening and I didn’t let anyone make me feel like I should do any different. And I didn’t make my friends feel like they should do something different from what they wanted to do.  Of course I would have loved to have been with my friends to celebrate 2019, but that’s not what was meant to be.

Of course, just because I enjoyed spending my New Year’s Eve alone doesn’t mean that I won’t be planning a lot of adventures with my friends this year. I hope that the year will be filled with so much fun with as many friends as possible and I can’t wait to see what the year brings!

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Default ThumbnailRinging In 2018 (or Being Festive While Being Lazy On The Couch) Default ThumbnailHappy Birthday Rayshell (or I Love Casual Hangouts!) Default ThumbnailA Very Low-Key NYE (or I’m Glad I Don’t Have To Impress My Friends) Default ThumbnailWelcoming 2017 (or The Start To My New Year’s Eve) Default ThumbnailHappy Birthday To FMIB! (or 2 Years And Finally Taking Myself Seriously As A Writer) Default ThumbnailNew Year’s Eve Fun (or Making Sure 2014 Is A Lucky Year)

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Thinking About My Relationships (or Starting My 2018 Reflection)

Posted on December 27, 2018 | Comments Off on Thinking About My Relationships (or Starting My 2018 Reflection)

As I mentioned yesterday in my post, I spent time on Christmas being alone and reflecting on some things. I think reflecting back on the year that was is a pretty common thing to do and I’ve been doing it more and more each year. I think having posts on here regarding goals and monthly challenges has helped me think more about what happened over the past 12 months. And I usually can put things into a single post when reflecting back. But I feel like this year had too much and I wanted to split things up. So over the next few posts, I will be doing reflections of the year that was and goal setting for the year coming up. And I’m starting with the relationships I had this year.

I know many people think of relationships as romantic and dating ones. That wasn’t what came to my mind originally, but it is a part of what happened. And since it is the smaller portion of the relationships I wanted to reflect on, I’m going to start with those.

I continued my crazy journey of online dating this year. I would have loved to have ended this journey during the year, but that wasn’t the case for me. Fortunately, even though I had a ton of bad dates, they were bad dates that were funny. I left so many dates filled with stories to tell my friends about how bad the date was, but I was telling them with a smile on my face. I also learned to be a bit pickier about who I met in person and how to stand up for myself better so I think that the idiots and creeps I encountered online were easier to deal with. I didn’t hesitate to end a conversation that made me second guess things even if it was going fine before that moment. I also set the new rule/restriction that I didn’t give out my phone number until I met someone in person. Somehow that seemed to help me filter out guys I met and I didn’t have to worry about the scammers getting my number.

But while most of the relationships I had with guys this year weren’t bad, there were some situations that hurt me. I felt betrayed by some guys and that’s not easy to get over. I tried to think about how I didn’t do anything wrong and it didn’t really have to do with me, but that’s not the easiest thing to keep in mind. But as the year went on I got better about dealing with it and it is hurting a bit less each time I feel hurt or blindsided. I don’t necessarily want that feeling to go away completely since I do want to still keep my heart open to the possibility of meeting someone amazing. And when your heart is open you are at risk for feeling hurt.

I’m still staying as active as I can with online dating and trying to be more thoughtful about staying active and trying to get beyond messaging on the app and going out for a drink or something with the guys I meet on there. And while that didn’t result in me meeting anyone incredible this past year, I am trying to stay optimistic that doing it again for the coming year will bring better results.

While finding a romantic relationship is important to me, while reflecting back on the year I realized that I had the biggest and best gains in my relationships with my friends. I thought from time to time that I might be a bad friend and I let some friendships drop for one reason or another. But when I thought about it more over the past few days, I discovered that while I might have turned some friends into acquaintances the friendships I kept grew so much stronger.

Building and strengthening friendships can come out of the good times, but I had so much growth out of the more difficult times. When my friend told me he wanted to kill himself and I was able to convince him on the phone to go to a hospital, I had to be ok with the idea that my friend might want to end his friendship with me. I am so grateful that not only did they want to stay friends but I feel like our friendship has grown quite a bit. We have been able to be more open and honest with each other and that is incredible. I was worried about telling my friend things in our friendship that were hard on me, but they listened to me and we were able to fix things and make our friendship even more mutually beneficial than it ever has been.

I’ve had multiple friends go through the end of romantic relationships this year and their breakups weirdly brought us closer. I think when they thought about having to date again, they came to me asking for my advice and stories about online dating. I don’t want to scare anyone off, but I was honest and shared my tips and how I stay safe. And putting that honesty out there helped to make my friendships with those people more honest in other ways too.

But of course, I was also able to build my friendships from fun things that I do in my life too. Even just going to a movie with a friend gives time for us to talk one to one without the distractions of other people trying to get our attention. Having those 15-20 minutes before a movies starts can be better than 3-4 hours at a party where there are so many other people. I’ve been trying to be better about doing fun things with other people instead of just going alone so I have those chances to talk to someone and have a real catching up talk.

I thought this past year was really a year of me being selfish. There were several monthly challenges that were all about me and putting myself first and I thought that meant some of my relationships would not be able to grow. It was such a nice surprise for me when I was reflecting back and realized that I was wrong with that assumption and that I really did have growth with my friends over the past year.

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Another After Work Disney Adventure (or Holiday Time And Random Fun)

Posted on December 21, 2018 | Comments Off on Another After Work Disney Adventure (or Holiday Time And Random Fun)

I haven’t been going to Disneyland as often as I used to. I still am getting my money’s worth on my pass and I still love to go, but I just haven’t been there as much as I would like to. I used to go by myself all the time, but now I just don’t feel like doing that. I miss having my friends with me if I’m there alone, but maybe I’ll work on doing that from time to time in the future.

But since my pass is about to be blacked out for the holidays, I wanted to make it one more time before the end of the year. And my friend Dani was able to join me after work earlier this week so we decided to do another afternoon and evening in the parks. Fortunately, the weather did not predict rain like the last time we were there, so we knew we’d be able to do a few more rides. But we also mainly wanted to go to the parks to see the decorations and have some fun so we weren’t too focused on getting a lot of rides done.

The drive down to Disneyland was a bit longer than normal due to traffic, but we got there with plenty of time left in the day to have some fun. We knew that in California Adventure they were doing the Festival of Holidays, so we decided to see the offerings and decide if we wanted to do one of the food passes. As soon as we got into California Adventure, I was just so happy to see all the holiday decorations and how festive the park looked!

We weren’t too excited by the food options at the different stands, so we just got 2 things on their own instead of getting the food pass. We got a turkey tamale and bagel chip nachos (the nachos were much better) but I didn’t get a photo of them. We needed to get some real food for dinner so we went to the sourdough place to get bread bowls (I had broccoli cheddar soup and again forgot to take a photo).

After food, it was time for a few rides in California Adventure. I had to go on the Incredicoaster since I couldn’t go on it the last time I was there. While it is the same ride as before, they added some theming and a new soundtrack. And I really liked how the updated version looked especially with it all lit up at night!

And we also rode the Guardians ride since that one is really one of my favorites. I still have one version of the ride to do and this time it was another repeat song. But one day I’ll get that last song!

We were in the California Adventure side for a few hours and even though we didn’t ride that many rides, we just enjoyed walking around the park. We both thought it would be much more crowded, and while there were a lot of people, it wasn’t that bad. There were areas where things got a busy, but in general it nice to not feel packed between everyone. And since we weren’t squished, we could take time to appreciate how pretty things looked.

Then we headed over to the Disneyland side. And just like California Adventure it was decorated so nicely for the holidays.

We knew we wanted to ride the Haunted Mansion to see it decorated for the holidays, but we had to make a quick stop first. We knew that there was going to be a new quick service restaurant opening near the Tiki Room, but we didn’t know if it would be open when we were there. But it turns out that they were starting to do a soft opening that day so we had to check it out!

It’s called the Tropical Hideaway and they have some really amazing offerings. They had 3 different types of bao buns and some other savory options. But what Dani and I were most excited for were the Dole Whip flavors!

They have the regular pineapple one as well as orange and raspberry. You can do one flavor or swirl 2 of them and there may be new flavors coming in the future. I hate pineapple yet I love Dole Whips, but I was so excited to try new flavors! I got an orange and raspberry swirl and Dani got the pineapple and raspberry swirl.

It was so good! I loved the orange and it tasted like a creamsicle! And the combination of orange and raspberry was perfect! Dani also got some of the bao buns and I tried a little bit of one and they were really good too. I know this is totally going to be one of our new favorite snack places to get something savory and something sweet. I can’t wait to go back another time so we can try more of the savory foods!

After riding the Haunted Mansion, we were feeling ready to head home. We were in the parks for over 5 hours and we did a ton of walking! But it helped me get my Disney fix in now so I don’t miss it too much while my pass isn’t good.

But one of the best parts of our Disney outing was actually something that happened toward the beginning. We both love to look through the different stores to see what new merchandise is for sale. Disney has really been stepping up their game in getting fun and cute new things. I rarely buy things since I can’t afford them (especially now), but I love to look and dream of things I’d love to get.

In one of the first stores we went into, Dani grabbed me because she saw something amazing: Disney is selling really cute and soft leggings! In the store they had a castle pattern, Disney cat pattern, and Disney dog pattern. I feel in love with the dog leggings and was debating if I should just get them and figure out money later. They were so awesome and I was so sad when I had to be responsible and decide that I just couldn’t spend the money. But that’s when Dani said that she wanted to buy them for me for Hanukkah!

I was totally not expecting her to say that and I told her she didn’t have to, but she wanted to and I am so grateful that she did! As soon as I got home after being in the parks, I changed and put them on. They are so comfortable and the perfect lounging leggings!

I don’t know if I’d wear them out and about, but I really just wanted them for being in my house or for sleeping in. And these are seriously just so perfect! I still can’t believe that Dani got them for me and I have thanked her over and over for her generosity!

All in all, this was a really successful Disney adventure. We got to do a few rides, we got to each some food, we checked out a new restaurant, and we got new Disney swag! I couldn’t ask for anything more!

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Default ThumbnailA Disney Morning (or Dealing With The Heat For One Ride) Default ThumbnailOne More Disney Day (or Yummy Food and Roller Coasters) Default ThumbnailA Calm Disney Day (or Enjoying An Empty Park) Default ThumbnailAn Easy Disney Day (or Another Eat All The Foods Adventure) Default ThumbnailBroadway Sings Disney (or A Fun Adventure With An Awesome Friend) Default ThumbnailAnother Disney Day (or Gaston And AP Days)

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Spreading Some Holiday Cheer (or Finding Cheaper Ways To Make People Smile)

Posted on December 20, 2018 | Comments Off on Spreading Some Holiday Cheer (or Finding Cheaper Ways To Make People Smile)

With it being the holiday season, so many people do things to try to make others smile. I love seeing the happiness and cheer this time of year and I try to participate however I can. If money wasn’t an issue, I would do so much for friends and strangers alike. That’s not the case for me so I do have to find out how to do things for less money.

I don’t have to worry about buying too many presents which does help with spending. I really only get presents for my immediate family and I already did those gifts. I work hard on those gifts and try to find the best things that I can afford. Fortunately, the gifts I’ve done the past few years have been less expensive than they appear to be so that helps. And since I get one gift for my parents and one gift for my brother and sister-in-law, that helps too. I don’t have to worry about getting 4 presents and can focus on 2 really good ones.

The only other gift I had to do this year was for the Reddit Secret Santa. I’ve done a few of these Reddit gift exchanges before and they have always been fun. Again, I would love to spend way more money than the suggested amount to get everything the person I got matched with asked for. But I have to read into what they want and really try to find the best thing that I can afford. This year, the person I got mentioned how they wanted to learn more about the science of cooking and they love popcorn. So I found a great book all about cooking and why things happen with different preparations as well as some fancy popcorn salt. The person I matched with posted online about how they loved the gifts and they fit exactly what they were looking for. So even though I couldn’t spend a ton of money, I got them something they liked and appreciated.

My presents from my Reddit Secret Santa have been coming in a few different boxes. There is still one more box coming and I don’t know what is in it, but I’ve gotten 2 presents so far. Just like the person I matched with, in my profile I mentioned I love popcorn and my Secret Santa got me a variety of gourmet microwave popcorn flavors! I also mentioned I like historical fiction books and they got me a box set of books that are about female pirates. I have no idea what the last box will contain, but I’m excited to see what they got me since these gifts have been so cool so far!

Another holiday thing that I’ve done the past few years is to do holiday cards. I don’t do anything with my photo since it seems weird to do that when I don’t have my own family (or a pet), so I can buy just regular cards in a store or online. For a few years, I did cards with envelopes and those were easy enough to do. But to save money as my holiday card list has grown, I did postcards last year and am doing the same this year. Postcard stamps are about half the cost of regular stamps so that is a pretty significant savings for me. And since the cards are always pretty simple ones, it’s not a big deal for me to do postcards instead of cards in envelopes.

I’ve been a bit slow with getting my postcards out this year. Normally I have them out toward the beginning of the month, but this time I’m still working on finishing them. I’m hoping to get them to the post office by tomorrow, but I’m not sure if I’ll make that deadline. But it’s ok if they arrive after Christmas since they aren’t specific to any holiday. And I know that since most people don’t get things in the mail, it will make them happy even if they arrive in January. No matter when they get them, it will be something special and not just boring bills in their mailbox.

I’m also starting to get holiday cards from my friends which makes me so happy too. I do get a lot of joy out of doing things for other people, but I also enjoy getting things myself. I always feel special that someone has included me in their holiday card list and I love seeing the fun cards that people send out. A lot of my friends that send cards have kids so it’s also a nice treat to get to see what pictures of their kids that they have on the cards.

It hasn’t been the easiest holiday season for me due to stress and worries, but I’m glad that it hasn’t stopped me from still finding ways to celebrate the holidays and to do special things. I know I don’t do a lot, but it’s something and I’m glad that the people who get things from me appreciate even the little things I can do.

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Just A Simple Dinner Out (or A Union Working Hangout)

Posted on December 18, 2018 | Comments Off on Just A Simple Dinner Out (or A Union Working Hangout)

I’ve been helping out with the Union Working group for a while now. For me, it seems so easy to run the FB live and it’s not a big deal. But I know that for the core members/leaders of the group, it is a big deal because that is one less thing that they have to worry about. And they really don’t have to worry about anything because I come to the meetings with all the equipment needed to run it and I set things up without needing any help. And with our new location for the meetings, we have WiFi so it’s even easier to run the live stream.

I know how hard the core members/leaders of the group work to run Union Working, so when they invited me out to a hangout to celebrate an awesome year as a group I was really honored! I am friends with some of those leaders, but others are people who I don’t know that well and I was excited to get to hang out with them in a casual setting and get to know them better. When we are at the meetings, I don’t want to bother them since they are so focused and working on running the meeting. So this was an opportunity I didn’t want to miss.

The hangout was at a brewery that is near where we have our meetings. I got there early and had a chance to hang out with a friend of mine who is one of the leaders before other members arrived. We found a big table that would fit us all and people started arriving pretty quickly once we were sitting down. A bunch of people were ordering drinks, but fortunately the brewery had a nice food menu too so I got a grilled cheese (which was delicious!).

Most of the time we were there we were just talking about random things. Some of them were acting related, some of them were just normal every day things. The conversation never stopped and there were times that 2 or 3 different conversations were happening at the same time. I was seated at the middle of the table so I was able to be a part of it all, but sometimes I just sat back and enjoyed listening to everyone else. It was pretty entertaining when some people got a bit silly and I just had fun watching it all happen.

There were some moments where the group and the accomplishments of the past year were mentioned and each of us were singled out for what we were able to do. When it came to me, they thanked me for taking over the FB live and for just jumping in and helping. They also thanked me for keeping them on task and bringing new ideas. It just reminded me of how something that might not be a big deal to me is really appreciated by others and I should accept their thanks instead of playing it off. When it’s a big deal to someone, I should acknowledge that and allow them to thank me however they feel appropriate. I don’t have to play it down and try to be modest that I’m not doing much. It’s not an easy thing for me to do because I don’t like feeling like I’m getting credit I don’t deserve, but I did deserve the credit from their perspective.

As it goes with so many events like this, I had every intention of leaving at a reasonable hour so I could get home and to sleep, but that didn’t happen. I was just having too much fun hanging out with everyone and I didn’t want to leave. But I couldn’t stay too late since I did have a bit of a drive home and had an early workout the next morning. But I was there for a few hours before I said my goodbyes and headed back to my car.

I left the hangout really feeling like I had made friends out of more of these core members/leaders. While I’m sure they were always my friends before, I really got to know them when we weren’t worried about working and I feel much more a part of the group now. I’m happy just doing my FB live work, but if they want more I know that I am willing to do that because I want to help however I can. And I’m much more comfortable now asking for help from those leaders if I need it because I know them better now.

We’ve got some amazing things happening with Union Working in the new year and some things that will still be happening this year. I can’t wait to get to share them when I can because they are really cool. I love getting to be a part of this group and every time I meet with them I appreciate the group more and more.

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A SAG-AFTRA Party (or Finally Getting Photos With My Friends)

Posted on December 14, 2018 | Comments Off on A SAG-AFTRA Party (or Finally Getting Photos With My Friends)

The SAG-AFTRA Holiday Party is an event that I love. I haven’t always gone to it, but I’ve tried to go every year the past few years. It’s not often I get to attend a union event that is all about being social and not about various union politics or issues. While you can’t always avoid discussing those things even at a party, the holiday party really is a time to relax and have fun.

And this party isn’t just a hangout. The LA Host Committee does an amazing job having a nice buffet meal, entertainment, and a photo booth. I usually don’t eat while I’m there and I don’t know if I’ve ever taken advantage of the photo booth, but I have always appreciated the options to have fun and I know that it makes so many people happy.

This year, even though the party fell on a nausea/pain day, I wasn’t feeling too bad when I got there. I was a bit tired from having a long day, but I perked up when I arrived and saw a friend of mine in line. She was nice enough to let me join her in line and that gave us a chance to catch up! Once the party officially started, the check in line went pretty quickly and we were inside within a few minutes!

Our first stop was to get some food and this year I was going to be enjoying it too! There was a really nice spread with lots of options. I had some salad, chicken teriyaki, shrimp ceviche, pot stickers, and prime rib! And there was a dessert spread too with cookies, brownies, and cake (I got some cake that had really delicious frosting!). After we all got our plates we found a table to stand at so we could eat without worrying about holding our plates.

The party was a bit crowded, but that is to be expected. And I was constantly running into friends and people I knew! I really felt amazing when I realized how many people in the union I do know. Sometimes it feels like I don’t know anyone or there are too many people there, but this year it didn’t feel like that. And even though I didn’t get to spend too much time catching up with many of my friends, I did make an effort to do my best. And I also tried to get photos with a couple of people too since I usually forget to do that!

Where we were standing to eat ended up being right next to where the quick speeches were going to be, so that worked out well for us! There was a quick speech to thank the LA Host Committee for doing such a great job with the party and to thank those of us who made it for attending. Then there was a short speech about the current strike we have with BBH. BBH is an ad agency that has declared that they no longer have to follow our union agreement and we as a union are not ok with that. They have an agreement to do union commercials and they should abide by that. So we are on strike until an agreement can be made. It’s an important issue for the union and I’m glad that they took some time to talk about it at the party so everyone there could be up-to-date on what is happening. They also had signs for us to take photos with to show our support for our union, and of course I took advantage of that!

The party was only 2 hours long as I was planning on leaving before it was over because my tiredness was starting to kick in. But of course I kept running into people I knew and got caught up into different conversations. I think I ended up leaving about an hour after I started to say goodbye, but that’s normal for events like this. I always end up finding people I know and hadn’t talked to yet and I don’t want to leave without at least saying hello and goodbye. And I was also helping a friend get an Instagram account set up and didn’t want to leave them until they had everything ready and knew how to post photos.

I’m so glad that I took a bit of a rest day earlier this week so that I could be at the SAG-AFTRA party. Even though I was still a bit tired, I think that had more to do with my early morning workout and maybe not getting enough sleep and not because of feeling overwhelmed and burnt out from too many events. I still have some more holiday parties to go to, but I am evaluating which ones are the most important so I can prioritize them if necessary. I want to make sure that I can have as much fun at any other parties as I did at the SAG-AFTRA one!

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Trying To Avoid Holiday Burnout (or Staying Home For Self-Care)

Posted on December 13, 2018 | 1 comment

I’ve written about laziness being self-care for me sometimes. I can be very obsessed with getting things done sometimes and I know that it can lead to burnout for me. And when that happens, it usually takes me a while to get back to normal and I’m in this endless cycle of making up for lost time with being busy and being lazy. Finding the balance is a struggle that many of us have and I know a lot of us have been working on it for years.

While I don’t think I have the balance figured out, I had a small victory for me in finding it. This is the season of holiday parties and it can be very overwhelming. If I went to all the parties that I was invited to, between last Saturday and this Sunday I would be at 12 different events. This is not me bragging that I’m invited to a lot of things because many of them are with a lot of the same people or just something casual. But because they aren’t big events, I feel like I should make more of an effort to attend them. When it’s not a big deal, I can feel like I don’t have as many excuses to stay home.

I was supposed to attend a holiday party for an organization I’m a part of earlier this week. I had been looking forward to it and it was on a night that I didn’t have anything else so I thought I’d have no reason not to go. Of course, life never goes the way I expect it to go and this week is the week that I have my worst nausea and pain. And while I know I can push through it and will be doing that other nights this week, I had to prioritize myself and realize that staying home would be the best thing for me.

While I don’t love missing out on an event because it’s always a great opportunity to meet new people (especially now when I really need to find a new job!), I also know that if I go and I’m not feeling my best that I won’t make the best impression either. There would have been a chance that I would have driven to the event and already feeling like I’m ready to go home. Then the entire time that I would be there, I would be watching the time and wondering when I had been there long enough to feel like I had been social so I could go home. And that’s just not what I want to have as the impression that people would have of me.

So I stayed home instead of going out to this event. I didn’t do much at home besides catching up on podcasts and job hunting, but it was exactly what I needed to do for myself. Sometimes being anti-social is more important than being social in order to take care of yourself. And I think I’m not feeling too guilty about staying home because I have so many other events happening this week and weekend. I did not stay home from the only event I had this week and the rest of the week I’ll be bored and wishing I had plans. I found a balance and had to pick which events were a bit more important for me to go to than others. And while I could have picked a different event to skip and gone to the one I missed, I also know that I should be feeling better as the week goes on and that played a factor in the decision too.

I know that holiday burnout is a real thing and I see it happening to so many friends as well as myself. There’s no need for me to put so much pressure on myself to do it all when I know that nobody is expecting me to do that. And with self-care being a very important thing for many people right now, I imagine that if anyone wondered where I was and asked me about it, they would understand if I said I needed to do some self-care and stay home. I’m working on self-care being more than just things I do for myself but also including doing nothing when I know that is the best thing for me at that time. 

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Default ThumbnailUnion Working Holiday Party (or Just Enjoying Being Around Good People) Default ThumbnailAnother Union Holiday Celebration (or Being Social And Working Social Media) Default ThumbnailSelf-Care Is So Important (or At-Home Beauty) Default ThumbnailCraving Social Interaction (or Staying Away And Staying Online) Default ThumbnailWeird Feelings About Reopening Things (or I Might Just Keep Staying Home) Default ThumbnailI Tried, I Still Hit Burnout (or Finding Some New Limits)

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Another OTF Hangout (or Discovering A New Local Wine Bar)

Posted on December 11, 2018 | Comments Off on Another OTF Hangout (or Discovering A New Local Wine Bar)

There have been so many organized outings coordinated by Orangetheory that I haven’t been able to go to over the years. For a long time, it was just tough for me to go to anything organized by the Brentwood studio since I didn’t drive over to Brentwood other than my workouts. I didn’t want to go there to work out, drive home to shower and change, and then go back that way for a happy hour. It was sad I never really could make it, but I knew that it just wasn’t meant to be for those.

But since the Culver City studio opened, I’ve been making more of an effort to attend the different events that they do. And I have felt such a part of the community at that studio that I am more motivated to try to go. I’ve been able to make friends at the Culver City studio much faster than I could in Brentwood, but I think that is mostly because of how comfortable I am in the workouts. I’m not so terrified or feeling out of place that I can’t focus on who is in class with me. I’m still in my own head a lot and don’t notice who is always in class with me, but I’m trying to get better about it.

So when I found out there was going to be a fun Saturday evening hangout at a wine bar for the Culver City studio, I put it on my calendar. The day of, I was feeling a bit nauseous and debating about not going. But one of my workout friends texted me about an hour before to ask if I was going to go. Since she was going to be there, I decided that I could do my best to ignore how yucky I was feeling because it was going to be worth it to be hanging out with people I usually only see in workout clothes.

This hangout was held at Stanley’s Wet Goods, which I hadn’t been to before. My favorite wine bar in Culver City closed a little while ago and I hadn’t found a new place to go. So when I saw that this was a wine bar, I was excited to see what they had to offer (even if I really don’t drink). 

When I got there, I was a little bit confused at first. The space looks like a wine store with a side section with tables where you can order wine. I didn’t recognize anyone at first, but everyone else was looking as confused as I was and we realized we were all there for the Orangetheory hangout. Then we found out that there was a back room that was reserved for us so we all got our things to head back there. And just as we were going to the back room, my friend arrived. So I was feeling much better about knowing people and not feeling alone.

Once we got to the back room, we all sat down at the tables there. We were trying to figure out if we were in the same classes or not (I really think the name tags we get need to include a section for us to write down when we go to class). I always feel bad when someone recognizes me from class and I don’t recognize them, but everyone seems to understand that when you are super focused on your workout you aren’t always looking to see if you see the same faces each week in your class. But it didn’t really matter if I recognized someone or not because everyone was introducing themselves to each other and I never had to feel embarrassed that I didn’t know someone that I should have.

For most of the evening, I was sitting at the same table because it was pretty central in the room. I was sometimes sitting the people seated on the other side of the table and sometimes I turned so I could face the other table. It wasn’t a huge room so it never felt like I was really missing seeing anyone. And I was getting pretty involved in a couple of different conversations so I wasn’t really thinking that I had to find other people to talk to. It was nice not having moments of feeling left out or wondering who else I could talk to. I always felt very much in the middle of conversations and I loved all the randomness that we were all talking about.

We talked about coaches we love, people were asking me about the Brentwood studio since many of them haven’t been there before, we talked about people we see in class and don’t know their names (and they weren’t at the bar), and as it seems like so many conversations go to we talked about dating in LA. It was funny to hear the crazy stories that other OTF people have had dating and of course I had to share a couple of my best crazy ones.  It’s nice to have people to talk to who are going through the same issues with dating that I have because it helps me not feel like some of the issues I’ve encountered are due to me. It might be due to being in LA or the guys that we are meeting here, but it’s not something I’m bringing onto myself.

By the time I was heading back home, the room we were in cleared out. I didn’t realize so many other people had left already because I was focused on who I was talking to. But it did help me feel a bit less guilty for leaving because it seemed like the night was winding down.

I’ve said this before, but it’s so hard to make friends as an adult. There aren’t as many opportunities to make new friends once you are done with school, so I am always grateful for events like this that help me meet people I already have something in common with. And hopefully I’ll start recognizing more people in class with me (or they will remind me we met at the outing) so I can have even more friends with me in class.

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Default ThumbnailNot Drinking At A Bar (or A Birthday Party At Neat) Default ThumbnailThe Best Birthday Party! (or Wine Bar and Breakfast Bar) Default ThumbnailAnother OTF Hangout (or Having Fun Being Social In Normal Clothes) Default ThumbnailHaving Water At A Wine Bar (or Getting A Temporary Job) Default ThumbnailBar Food Hangout (or A Quick Friend Catch Up) Default ThumbnailWine, Wine, Wine, Wine, and Champagne (or Part Of My Weekend In Napa)

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A Hanukkah Dinner (or Sharing Some Traditions With A Friend)

Posted on December 5, 2018 | Comments Off on A Hanukkah Dinner (or Sharing Some Traditions With A Friend)

I’m Jewish, but I’m not really religious or celebrate most Jewish holidays. That’s just how I was raised and it’s not something I think about much. When I was little my family did do Hanukkah and sometimes Passover, but we really didn’t do other holidays or celebrate every year. When people ask me about being Jewish, I say that I’m much more culturally Jewish and religious. But whenever a friend wants to celebrate a Jewish holiday with me I’m always happy to share what limited knowledge I have about the holiday.

My friend Christopher (who wrote the short film we starred in together) asked me very early this year if I wanted to have a night of Hanukkah with his family. They are not Jewish, but they wanted to celebrate it and to have their kids learn about holidays that other religions celebrate. I loved that he asked me very early so I could put it on my calendar before other events were filling up my time. So of course, I said yes and we figured we’d talk more about what they wanted to do closer to the date.

Christopher started to text me questions about Hanukkah because he wanted to make it exactly how I would celebrate it. I told him that I don’t really celebrate, but I let him know different things that I think of when I thought of Hanukkah. I told him that latkes or donuts are traditional foods since you usually eat things that have been fried in oil. And I gave him my mom’s brisket recipe since he was asking for a good main dish options, but I knew that since that recipe takes a long time to be made that he probably would just save that one for another day.

Christopher also did a bunch of research on his own and decided to make dreidels for his kids! I was just going to buy some at the store, but he’s really great at making things so he took a look at some and made plans on how to make them from scrap wood. I was very impressed when he sent me a text with a photo on how they came out!

I also wanted to bring things with me to help celebrate Hanukkah. I was going to bring the menorah my dad made for me but I also wanted to bring little gifts for the kids. I went to Party City where I was super surprised by how many Hanukkah things they had! I don’t know if I’ve ever seen such a wide selection of Hanukkah stuff. Even though it’s still a fraction of the Christmas stuff, it’s still a big improvement over what I’ve seen in the past.

I went over earlier this week to celebrate with Christopher and his family. I knew that I wouldn’t be able to get to their house at sundown (when you are supposed to light the menorah), but since this was a casual thing I was fine with it and told Christopher that it didn’t matter if we were doing things the traditional way. I got there just in time for dinner and that worked perfectly.

Christopher went all out with the food he made! He got brisket from a BBQ place (which was delicious), but that’s because he made 3 types of latkes and 2 types of donuts! He made traditional latkes, sweet potato latkes, and French onion latkes along with sour cream and applesauce on the side (I’m partial to sour cream on my latkes).  And he made regular donuts and blueberry filled donuts. I wish I had taken a photo of the food, but we were all enjoying it and I wasn’t thinking about documenting it all. But I think that’s a good thing since I don’t want to live my life through my phone, I want to be more in the moment.

One of the biggest memories I have about Hanukkah as a kid is what the holiday smells like, because it always smells like oil. I don’t make latkes at my house because it would make everything smell like oil and my house is so small that all my clothes in my closet would smell that way too. But when I walked into their house, one of the first things I said was how much it smelled like Hanukkah and I think they loved it. And I’m so happy that not only did it smell like the holiday but it tasted like it too!

After we were done with the food, the kids started to play with the dreidels and I was teaching them how to spin them. We didn’t play the game with chocolate or pennies, but I did bring them some Hanukkah gelt to enjoy anyway. I just didn’t want to complicate things with them on trying to teach them how to play when they were just enjoying trying to spin them. And while the original plan was to light the candles on my menorah, it was getting late and Christopher and his wife found a wood menorah with stickers to look like candles. So I showed them what order the candles go in so they could “light” it properly.

And of course, the kids had to open the gift I brought for them. I tried to find little things they could share so I got some Hanukkah stickers, temporary tattoos, and a puzzle (which is a bit more of a family gift since it’s not a super easy puzzle). And whenever you give kids temporary tattoos, you know that you are going to have at least one of them on your skin.

By the way, I discovered that nail polish remover does a great job at removing temporary tattoos!

After the kids went to bed, I had time to chat with Christopher and his wife. It was fun getting to chat and catch up and talk about all the randomness in life. They are doing a holiday party soon that I am hoping to attend, but I know at parties like that it’s not always easy to talk to the people hosting it. So it was fun getting time to talk when they weren’t worried about being good party hosts or they were distracted by tons of different things.

Time seemed to fly by and before I knew it, it was much later than I was planning on being there. I wanted to get home at a decent hour to get some sleep before my early work shift and it was already pushing that time. So I said goodbye and headed back home.

I don’t know if I’ll really be doing any other nights of Hanukkah this year. I’ll probably light my menorah at least once, but I’m not planning on doing anything big like I did at this dinner. So it was nice to have one night feel special and like I was celebrating it instead of just acknowledging the holiday and not doing anything for it.

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Default ThumbnailGrandma’s Birthday Dinner (or One Of Our Thanksgiving Traditions) Default ThumbnailFirst Half Of Thanksgiving (or Hanukkah Gifts And Birthdays) Default ThumbnailCheesecake Dinner (or A Half Birthday Outing) Default ThumbnailGrownup Dinner (or Seeing A Gym Friend Outside Of The Gym) Default ThumbnailAn Overdue Friend Hangout (or A Medical Discussion Dinner) Default ThumbnailA Goodbye Dinner (or My Friend Is Becoming A Georgia Peach)

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Posted in Celebrations, Food, Fun Stuff

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The First Holiday Party Of The Season (or A Meeting And A Mixer)

Posted on November 30, 2018 | 2 comments

This week was the last Union Working meeting of 2018. With the holiday season starting, it’s tough to plan for a meeting in December because so many people have travel plans or other events to go to. And this meeting wasn’t a regular meeting, it was part meeting and part holiday mixer. But it was the perfect way to kick off the holiday season and the parties I’ll be going to.

I got to the meeting early so I could set up the Facebook Live things. I know that the team at Union Working appreciate that I do this for the meetings, but I always feel like I should be doing more because it’s not that hard for me to do. But if that’s what they need me to do, I’m glad I can do it! When I got there, a lot of the things for the party were already set up. There was a table full of amazing food and a bar area set up and I know that we were expecting a lot of people to be there (actors love free food and drinks!).

People arrived in waves since it was more of a party so I felt like I was always seeing someone I knew and getting to say hi and catch up with them. It was nice to not have to worry about getting everything ready for a meeting to start and to just enjoy time with those who were there.

About an hour into the party, the meeting portion of the evening happened so I got the Facebook Live video ready. It was a very brief meeting with the premiere of a new video that will be released soon regarding keeping the union strong, some notes about how we have merchandise for sale for those interested in representing Union Working with a hat or key chain, and then the leaders of the group were sharing their appreciation for everyone else. It was really nice to see how passionate the leaders of the group are about working hard for all actors. We see that passion when they are running the meetings, but seeing them be grateful for what we have accomplished was a different type of passion and it made me even more proud to be a member of the group.

After that was done, it was back to the party. I kept the Facebook Live running because we wanted to give people the opportunity to come over and say things to those watching in other parts of the country. A few people did come over to say thank you to those in other markets for working hard, but most of the time I was running it there was nobody there and I was just looking at the step and repeat.

Even though people weren’t coming over to talk on the video, I wasn’t by myself at the party. Friends were coming over to hang out and talk with me throughout the evening. And it actually worked out a bit better since where I was wasn’t as crowded as the area by the food where most people were hanging out. I liked having my own party area so I didn’t feel as overwhelmed or like I was in the middle of a crowd. I did go over and get some food (which was delicious!), but most of my time was over by the step and repeat.

And even though I always tell myself that I want to get a picture in front of the step and repeat, it usually is taken down before I remember or get a chance to do it. This time I wasn’t going to let the opportunity pass so I finally got a fun selfie in front of it.

Most people were taking advantage of the step and repeat being out of the way and available and were taking photos too. There were so many selfies taken and a lot of fun group photos. I thought about doing some group photos with my friends in front of the step and repeat, but because so many people were busy talking I didn’t want to interrupt them. And I loved watching everyone talk because there were lots of conversations about union related issues and lots of new people meeting each other and becoming friends. It was kind of fun being able to sit back and just enjoy the people watching.

But since everyone has a camera and was taking photos, I did get one group photo with my friends when the party was winding down. It’s not in front of the step and repeat, but at least I got one photo that proves I was there with other people!

I got everything from the Facebook Live cleaned up before the party was done so when cleanup was happening I asked if I could help in any other way. We had some amazing volunteers who were doing the cleanup and they didn’t need me. And that was ok since it was getting late and I had to work early the next morning. So I made my rounds of goodbyes to my friends and headed home.

Even with being over by the Facebook Live setup for most of the party, I never felt like I was alone or separate from everything going on. I loved having my own area to talk with my friends and to meet new people at the meeting. I know that next year is a big one for our union with elections happening again along with contract negotiations, so it’s going to be more important than ever to be as involved as I can with Union Working. And that’s exactly what I plan on doing!

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Default ThumbnailA SAG-AFTRA Party (or Finally Getting Photos With My Friends) Default ThumbnailSAG-AFTRA Holiday Party (or Getting Ready For Elections Again) Default ThumbnailUnion Working Holiday Party (or Just Enjoying Being Around Good People) Default ThumbnailUnion Holiday Party (or Seeing A Lot Of People In A Little Time) Default ThumbnailFirst Halloween Party Of The Season (or At Least I Made An Appearance) Default ThumbnailA NextGen Mixer (or Just Having Fun With My Friends)

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