I’ve been back at work for a few days now. At first, it was really nice. I got to see my co-workers, I was making money, and I like feeling like I have a purpose.
But the honeymoon stage of working again wore off pretty quickly. And it’s the little things that bother me. I miss knowing that I can go to spin class whenever I want. I’m trying out going to a class this morning, but I’m worried I won’t have enough time to get ready to go to work after. I hate eating dinner at 9 or 9:30 at night, but if I don’t have some sort of dinner, I’m too hungry after work (and it’s hard to eat while I’m working on the phone). And I don’t like being limited in when I can go run errands. Just last night, I was supposed to have dinner and hang out with a friend, but it had to be cut very short because I needed to go to the grocery store and get gas for my car.
I know that I’m whining, but this is honestly how I feel. And I’m not going to look for a different job since this one pays well and my boss is cool with me going to auditions (which is incredibly hard to find). I’m also just surprised that the schedule shocked me so much since this was exactly what I was doing 6 weeks ago before my unemployment started.
So to fix my feelings, I’m trying to get better (again) at planning. Like I said, today I’m testing if I have time to go to a morning spin class before work (I have a late start time today since I have to work until 10pm so there is room in case I take longer getting ready than I hope to). I’m working on re-doing my food plan again so I could get away with only having a light snack at night instead of a meal. But that’s tough because I get up at 7am, have a little something in the morning, eat my breakfast at 11am, and have my lunch break at 4pm. If I stop eating for the day at 4pm, I get very hungry when I’m trying to fall asleep.
Again, these are all things I need to work on getting adjusted to again. It wasn’t easy when I started this job a year ago. I was just leaving a job where I worked 8-4:30 3 days a week (but the job made me very unhappy so I didn’t want to stay there). Getting used to being at work 6 days a week is not easy. And it’s not any easier this time because I’m also trying to have a life this time around.
I remember reading somewhere that it takes 21 days to create a habit. So I’m hoping that on my 21st day of work this season, things will start to get easier. And if they don’t, I might just have to plaster a smile on my face and pretend that everything is great until I do something like win the lottery or book a tv series.
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