I pretty much spent Christmas the way I expected to. I did work out that morning, which normally isn’t part of my routine on Christmas, but besides that everything was pretty normal. Most years, since I’ve lived in LA, I spend Christmas watching movies and ordering Chinese food. Sometimes I go out for dinner or for a movie and sometimes everything is at my house. But it’s pretty much the same deal every year.
The one big issue I discovered doing that this year was that it seemed like everyone was ordering Chinese food! I thought I’d eat early so I went to place my order online at 4pm. When I did that, the next available delivery wasn’t until 7! I thought I was beating the rush, but I guess not. And my food didn’t arrive until almost 9. I was actually worried that the delivery driver had gotten into an accident or something so I called the restaurant to make sure everything was ok, It was, they were just way busier than they expected. Christmas is always a crazy night for them, but this was another level of craziness! Several of my friends tried to order in food from their local restaurants and were told they weren’t accepting orders anymore! So I guess I was lucky even with a 5-hour delay between ordering and getting my food. Next year, I’ll plan better and maybe place an order in the morning with a set later delivery time.
But it worked out just fine for me in the end. I had my food and I watched my movie. Exactly what I expected to do and that made me happy.
But things felt different for me this year. I almost always spend Christmas alone. That’s fine with me and it usually doesn’t bother me much. But this year, it was a lot harder to be alone. I know that is probably because I have spent most of the last 9 months alone and isolated, so it just hits me harder. But knowing why doesn’t necessarily make the feelings any better. I just tried to accept that was how I was feeling and be ok with maybe not being in the best mood. I did try to cheer myself up with little things, but if they didn’t work I wasn’t hard on myself.
I know a lot of my friends struggled with being lonely at Christmas. I imagine it was even harder for them because they are used to be around their family and it was possibly the first time they weren’t together for the holiday. I know that feeling well since that’s how my Thanksgiving was. But we all know and accept that this is the way things have to be for now so that there are more holidays to celebrate in the future. And there is an end in sight with all of this.
I think the combination of winter holidays being bunched up together plus the days being so short make it a little extra tough in general. Adding in a pandemic and the isolation from it is something I couldn’t have imagined before this year. And I’m already preparing to have a bit of a tough time on New Year’s Eve since that’s a night I’m normally celebrating and surrounded by friends. But I know I will get through this time. I know I’ve written that multiple times, but I have to keep reminding myself often that I will be ok.
And next year when I’m having my usual Christmas alone with my movies and Chinese food, hopefully it won’t feel as lonely as it did this year and it will just be a nice day to myself.
You Might Also Like
A Very Low-Key Christmas (or Not Spending My Day Off Doing My Usual Stuff)
A Christmas Lunch (or The Levin-Levin-Levine Summit)
Merry Christmas (or I’ll Be Enjoying My Movies And Chinese Food)
Merry Christmas! (or I Hope You Are All Finding Ways To Celebrate!)
My Christmas Eve and Christmas (or A Late Night Target Run)
Merry Christmas! (or I’m Good With Whatever Happens Today)
