6 months ago, everything seemed to have changed. The pandemic really changed how life is for so many of us. That was when the old normal ended. I stopped seeing friends, going out, doing things around others, and I started being nervous whenever I had to leave my house. At that time, so many of us thought this was just going to last a month or so. I don’t think any of us believed that 6 months later, we’d still be in the same situation.
I know that there are some states that never really shut down like California did and many have reopened more than we have. But as far as things in LA and California go, we’ve been doing this for 6 months. I know there are some people that are going out with others and taking risks that most of us wouldn’t, but most of the people I know are staying home and staying isolated almost all the time.
I have had a few times I’ve seen people either from a distance or after I have isolated. I’m in the middle of another 2-week quarantine so I can see my family soon. I’ve seen so few people in the last 6 months, I honestly can’t think about it too much or I get really upset.
6 months of no Orangetheory workouts in person. I know that it’s for the best, but it’s so sad and it’s a huge thing that I miss all the time. 6 months of no restaurant meals with friends (except for my birthday socially distant picnic). 6 months of no movies in a movie theater but I have watched a ton of movies on Netflix Party. 6 months of no dates except for phone and virtual dates. In 6 months, I think I have done grocery shopping in person under 10 times (grocery delivery may always be a part of my life now as I’m finding it helpful for managing binges).
Things do seem to be getting better, but I’m worried that they aren’t going to stay better for long. More and more people are going out, even when the guidelines say not to do it. We saw a big spike in cases after people went out for Memorial Day, and I know we are still waiting to see what happened after Labor Day. And even if they are getting better, I don’t know how many risks I want to take. I hate that I’ve gotten so scared to be outside of my house, but that’s the point I’ve gotten to now.
And being 6 months in makes me wonder if we will have to do this for another 6 months. It seems crazy to even think that, but 6 more months would get us to March. With people saying a vaccine might not be until the end of the year, guessing that we will have to do this until March doesn’t seem that crazy. If a vaccine is approved in December, it will take several months for everyone to get it. I don’t want to think about having to do this for another 6 months because I have gotten so lonely already. I feel like I’ve lost time and had so many setbacks and I don’t want to see more time and progress slip away. I’m trying to not be upset over something I don’t know will happen and that I can’t control, but it’s not easy. I’m so tired of dealing with this and sometimes feeling like I’m the only one doing it.
6 months ago, I had no idea what I was in for. I knew that things had changed, but I really clung to the idea that my life would be back to normal before I knew it. Now, it seems like my old life is so long ago and far from where I am now. I don’t know if or when I’ll ever be back to it. All I can do is continue to do what I need to stay safe and healthy and try to be optimistic that I will be able to enjoy some of the things I miss again in the future.
You Might Also Like
Half Birthday (or Reflecting On The Past 6 Months)
I Keep Hitting Little Moments Of Writer’s Block (or Not Sure What To Say)
Sandy (or I Hope You Are All Safe)
Fearing The Worst (or Trying To Hope For The Best)
A Quick Post (or I Really Hope I’m Not Getting Sick)
Accepting Some Help (or Hope This Helps The Pain)
