Next week I’m going home for a few days. I have some time off of work so I figured it would be a good time for a trip home. When this was planned, I didn’t know that I would be going home for a quick visit in November, so it would have been a long time since I was home (I think the last time I was home was last year for Thanksgiving).
I’m excited to get to spend some time with my parents. While I got to see them for a little bit last week, this time I’ll have a few days so we won’t feel rushed. We don’t really have any plans for my visit, so it should be relaxing. I’m also hoping to get to see my brother and sister-in-law. I have their Hanukkah presents and would love to give them to them in person. I’m not sure when or if I’ll get to see them, but we are working on scheduling now.
I also might get to see a friend or two from high school. I haven’t really stayed in touch with too many people from high school (not counting FB of course), but my friend Jackie is trying to come over with her little boy for a visit. That would be great since I haven’t seen either of them in a long time.
But I’m nervous about going home because of my dog. He’s not doing so well right now. He seemed fine last week, but according to my parents he went downhill pretty quickly. He’s still happy, enjoying eating people food, and playing with other dogs and that’s important to me. But he’s also sleeping a lot and you can see the tumor on his leg growing.
We don’t know how much more time we have with Dante, but it’s seeming like it’s pretty limited at this point. But as long as he’s happy, I’m happy.
But I’m scared of two different scenarios.
First, if Dante dies before I come home, I won’t get to see him again. My last time to see him will be those few hours last week. And I don’t know how I will react if I go home and Dante wasn’t there to greet me at the door. Or to hear him playing with his favorite toys. Or to take him out on his walks. I don’t know if I could handle that or if I want to handle that (and yes, I understand that it will be so much harder on my parents than on me since they are with him every single day).
But if Dante doesn’t die before I go home, I’ll get to see him again. And I’m totally looking forward to that. But if he’s acting sick or not like himself, I know that will upset me. It was tough when I was home for the 24 hour visit and he was acting off. I’m pretty sure the pain pills were making him act funny, but it was very upsetting to see him acting loopy and confused.
Either way, I’m excited to get to go home and see everyone that I love. And with either scenario with my dog, I know that I need to be there for my parents.
I’m just focusing on the positives with my upcoming visit and knowing that my dog, while sick, is still enjoying his life to the fullest every day. And I should follow his example.