I’ve been writing about the new year for forever now! I’ve had a lot that I wanted to cover and I didn’t want to cram things into a single post. I like having the time to allow myself to reflect on the past year and be excited about the year to come. But I think I’m finally at my last post about the new year.
For the past few years, I’ve spent New Year’s Eve with my friends at a party. It was driving home from that party 2 years ago that my car died and I ended up getting a new (used) car. I love going to that party for so many reasons. Of course, I love getting to spend time with my friends. Any opportunities I get to hang out with amazing people is something I want to do. I also love the party because it’s very low-key and casual. I don’t have to dress up or be super social. I just get to hang out with my friends and it’s perfect.
This year, that party wasn’t going to happen. My friends do so many parties all the time, so we all understood they couldn’t host one. Plus, they have a puppy and the dog isn’t really used to be crowds yet. So if they had a party they would have had to board their dog at a dog hotel and they wanted to ring in the new year with their puppy. All completely understandable things.
I had been invited to a few other parties, but I wasn’t really sure if I wanted to go out. I had been feeling a bit lazy and I knew any of the other parties I was invited to would be much less casual than what I was hoping to do. I did message a couple of friends to see if anyone wanted to come over and watch movies and order pizza, but I think everyone was feeling the same as I was. Nobody was really the motivated to leave their house and be social. It was kind of funny that we all felt the same, but it also made it easier when we all decided not to really do much.
So I spent my New Year’s Eve alone at my house. I ordered some food and watched movies on tv. I had been dressed in workout clothes earlier that day for my workout, but after I showered and got dressed I spent the rest of the day in my pjs. I did stay up until midnight, but I was in bed ready to go to sleep when the clock stuck midnight. And pretty soon after that I was asleep.
I know that in the past I probably would have been upset about spending the night alone, especially after asking friends if they wanted to come over. But I was actually very happy and excited about how I spent my night. I could have made an effort and gone to a party, but I really didn’t want to and I wasn’t going to force myself to do that. And I didn’t feel bad that my friends didn’t want to come over because I was doing the same thing to them. This wasn’t anything against me or a reason to think my friends are against me. It was just what it was and there are no feelings about it.
I feel like that is a huge sign of growth. I didn’t overthink things or stress out about why it happened. I knew what I wanted to do with my evening and I didn’t let anyone make me feel like I should do any different. And I didn’t make my friends feel like they should do something different from what they wanted to do. Of course I would have loved to have been with my friends to celebrate 2019, but that’s not what was meant to be.
Of course, just because I enjoyed spending my New Year’s Eve alone doesn’t mean that I won’t be planning a lot of adventures with my friends this year. I hope that the year will be filled with so much fun with as many friends as possible and I can’t wait to see what the year brings!
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