I’ve got my liver MRI coming up this week. I haven’t had an MRI in a year, and I’m glad that I decided to do one this year. My liver surgeon gave me the option of waiting 2 years instead of 1 after my last appointment, but I think that would have been too long to wait. I’m still wondering what is going on with my tumors and I couldn’t imagine how I’d feel if I still had to wait another year before I found out.
I’m trying to not be nervous about the MRI, but I can’t help it. I still am scared that for some reason my tumors will be bigger. I know that it’s a really tiny chance that could happen, but I know that I’m also the person who gets the 1 in a million situations. I’m nervous about the MRI itself. I know I’ve done so many of these by now, but they still aren’t routine for me yet. I have been very lucky that my claustrophobic hasn’t been an issue while in the MRI machine. I think it helps that I can tilt my head back and see the room behind me. If I was in head first, I think that would be much worse. I’m nervous about getting the IV as well. I hate needles and that is always something I struggle with.
But I did get one of the needles out of the way last week. Before getting an MRI where they use contrast, you have to get bloodwork done. Because of the contrast they use, they have to make sure that your kidneys can filter it out of your body. I’ve never had kidney issues (although I have been told that I have a small cyst on one kidney, that’s never been discussed more with me other than telling me it’s there), so I know that I shouldn’t worry when I get my kidneys checked before my MRI. But I do worry because you never know when things will change. And of course, because it’s bloodwork, I have the needle to worry about.
I decided to do my pre-MRI bloodwork on Halloween this year. I happened to have that afternoon free so the timing was good. Plus, I was able to make the joke that my costume was a vampire victim. I know that the needles don’t leave a huge mark, but I do usually have a bruise when it’s done.
The last time I had bloodwork, there was a huge line and a long wait from when I checked in until I was seen. That time it was also worse because I was nauseous that day. This time, I was feeling good so I wasn’t dealing with nausea. And when I checked in, I barely had enough time to take a photo of my number before I was called to one of the stations.
Since it was only one thing they were checking with the blood, they only had to collect one vial. I warned the nurse like I warn anyone putting a needle in my skin about my issues with them. I let her know I might pass out or get very tense but that it was ok and she didn’t have to call anyone to take me to urgent care or the ER. I think the warning freaked her out a bit, but I know when I don’t warn the nurses that things are worse. Even though the nurse decided not to warn me about when she was going to stick me, I did ok. I did have the blacking out/tensing up moment that I’m used to, but it wasn’t as bad as it’s been before. And only a few minutes after I got to the hospital, I was already on my way out.
I’ve been trying to not think too much about the MRI this week, but it’s hard not to. For some reason, it seems like I get another thing from the hospital every day to prepare me. I have gotten appointment reminders, text alerts, and paperwork with what to expect during an MRI. I didn’t review that paperwork since I’ve done this before and I know I still have to fill out a form confirming I know all this information when I go in for the MRI. I won’t find out for a while about the tumors due to when I could get an appointment, so I know the time between the scan and my appointment will also be nerve-racking. But soon I’ll be past this and hopefully, everything will either be the same or better and I won’t have to worry about it again for at least another year.
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