Going Back To An Old Habit (or Finding Control With Budgeting)

A while ago, I started working hard on budgeting. I had tried so many different budgeting apps and sites over the years and I never felt like they worked for me. I always knew how important it was to budget, but I just couldn’t do it. This changed when I started using YNAB and I figured out how to use it (the first time I used it I was making mistakes that made it difficult for me to understand things).

For a long time, I was using YNAB religiously. I was able to properly budget for the first time in my life and I was so aware of my financial situation. This was so much more than I ever thought I could have and I was so happy. While my money situation isn’t the best, I felt better knowing exactly what it was. There were no surprises about where I would find the money to pay for certain things and I was using my credit card mindfully. While I wasn’t perfect, I knew I wasn’t perfect and I felt better about any mistakes I might have had.

Toward the end of last year, my financial situation got into a really bad place. There was one month I didn’t have money to pay my rent. I am so grateful that my parents were able to help me out, but it was still a very embarrassing time for me and I am ashamed that I had to do it. And when this was all happening, I stopped budgeting.

There was no point in me budgeting when it was just going to show that I was over-budgeted every month. I hated seeing all the red numbers on the budget knowing that I wasn’t really able to change it. I wasn’t budgeting categories like food or fun things. My bills and rent were making me in the red. While I loved having control, this was making me feel more out of control and I was starting to panic. So for my mental health, I had to stop budgeting for a bit.

I’m in a slightly better spot now with money. This is a temporary fix because my contract with my old job is only for a few more months. But the fact that this contract is temporary is the exact reason why I need to get back to my old habit of budgeting.

There is the possibility that the money I make in these few months could cover me for a good portion of the year. The only way to make that happen is to budget and to make sure that I am using my money properly. So I need to get back to doing just that and being just as serious as I was before.

Because I took a break from budgeting, I will have to start things over. It will be too complicated for me to go back to my old budget and update things since I would have to find a way to zero things out. And I can use this opportunity to reevaluate what categories I have for my budget and where I want to make sure my money is going or saved for. Plus, I think starting over will eliminate the potential panic I could feel if I tried to go back to the old budget that caused me some mental distress.

I’m trying to get this set up quickly, but I’m also trying to not rush through it. I want to take my time with getting everything the way I want it to be and to make sure I’m not missing anything. I want to have things as clear as I can for me so that I can see the full financial picture that I currently have and will have. And I also want to take the time to review the best practices for using YNAB so I don’t make any silly mistakes or worry about how to do something.

My goal is to have this up and running by next week for sure. I’ve been trying to get the budget part set up for the past day and I keep looking at it to make sure that it’s how I want it to look. There are adjustments that I’ve been making to make sure I don’t forget anything that I will need. I also have been trying to simplify things since I think that having too many categories can be an issue too.

It’s nice to be getting back on track with my money and budgeting. I can’t control that many things in my life, but this does bring me a small sense of control over what really is a bit of an out of control situation. And maybe I’ll be able to prevent the issues that I had at the end of last year by being more aware about things. I know that there were things that I probably did wrong that made my money situation worse than it needed to be.

Ideally, I will find a new job this year (yes, I’m still searching and applying for jobs almost every day) and that will help my financial situation to get to a place where I don’t have to worry about money as much. But having more money doesn’t mean I won’t budget things. I will just be able to budget for things that are more fun than bills and paying off my credit card. I would love to save for a trip or buying some things I want to have. And ultimately I’d like to find a way to start budgeting for buying a condo one day.

But for now, I just want to get back into a habit of budgeting so that when I’m ready to budget for fun things I already have the skills I need to do that.

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