I’ve been in isolation for about 3 1/2 months now. I haven’t left my house much. My biggest adventures in the world have been going to urgent care and seeing my family for a day. I rarely leave my house for errands and have been relying on delivery services (and yes, I do tip generously for the deliveries). Isolation has been tough on me. It’s very lonely. I’m used to being alone, but not lonely. And the lack of social interaction and physical touch is very hard to deal with. But fortunately, last week I got to change that up a bit.
My parents were down in Santa Barbara visiting my brother, sister-in-law, and nephew. And since they were there for a few days, they asked if I wanted to come up to see them all. And of course, I said yes! Besides feeling lonely and wanting to be around people, I wanted to see my family!
And I will give this disclosure like I did when I saw my family again. I only went because I had been isolating myself for a length of time without going out for errands. My family is all in medicine and I followed all of their guidance and rules. I didn’t do this without thinking it through or ignoring the fact that we are in a global pandemic. I didn’t know how close I could be to my family or if I was going to be required to wear my mask the entire time. I was prepared for whatever they said.
When I got there, I wasn’t wearing my mask while hanging out with my family because we were able to sit far enough apart. Plus, none of us have really been going out in public at all so we’ve all been pretty isolated for a long time. And it was so good to get to see my family and talk to them in person! I’m grateful for phone calls, texts, and video chats; but there is no replacement for in-person interaction.
And Rory had gotten so big since I had seen him! And his little personality was really coming out. He was very clear in what he liked and what he didn’t like. He had this really adorable look of frustration from time to time. I hated that he was frustrated, but I loved that you could tell that he had so much he wanted to say and express to us. I have a feeling that he will be very chatty as soon as he can talk.
And I got to hold him again too! Because I have been isolated for so long, I was able to hold him without wearing a mask. He’s pretty wiggly and was looking at everything around the house, so it hard trying to get a photo with him looking into the camera. This was the best that I could do.
We spent a lot of time at my brother and sister-in-law’s house, but we also went out for a walk. One of the main streets in Santa Barbara has been turned into a pedestrian-only area, so there was a lot of room to walk around without being too close to anyone else. I hadn’t really been out like that in months, and it was so nice to get to do that. I still was wearing my mask, even without people being that close to us. I have to be careful and cautious and it was an easy thing to do to stay safe.
Once we got back to the house, we had family dinner and then I had to head back home because I had something I had to do early the next morning. But I had gotten to spend a while with everyone and it was exactly what I needed. I needed to feel connected to people again to get ready to go back to being lonely.
I know that I am lucky that I got to do this. Not everyone is close enough to family to go to see them for the day. Not everyone can isolate the way that I’ve been able to so that they can be safe around others. And I am so grateful that I got to do this again. I don’t know when I’ll be back to see family again, so I am just grateful for the opportunities that I have had to see them. And when I can go again, I know that I’ll feel so happy that I can go.