At my last appointment with my therapist, we covered a bunch of things. We discussed my decrease in exercise due to my calf tear and the anxiety it caused me (if only I knew then that coming up there would be a week where I could only work out once). We talked about my happiness checklist and the fact that I’ve continued to do it every day as he asked me to. I’m still one of the only patients who has actually followed through with this homework assignment he has given to many patients. And we also talked about how I was doing on Vyvanse.
I’m very torn on Vyvanse. Since increasing my dosage to 2 pills a day instead of 1 pill a day, I’ve noticed that it does help me more often. But it doesn’t help all the time like I wished that it would. I know that it’s an aid and not a miracle drug, but that doesn’t stop me from wishing it was a miracle drug.
While it does help at times controlling my hunger (and I do sometimes forget to eat most of the day) it isn’t a weight loss medication so I’m not seeing a huge change on the scale. I know that I shouldn’t judge the medicine’s success by what number is on the scale, but I do.
I expressed these frustrations to my therapist when I was there last. He brought up a suggestion to me that I’ve been trying to test out. He wants me to try going one or two days a week without taking Vyvanse. He wants me to do that on days that I’m not doing anything that may put me in a tough situation with food.
At first, I didn’t want to do this. But the more I thought about it, the more it made sense. Since this is a time release medication it’s good to have days without it so my body doesn’t get used to it. I’m close to the maximum dose that my therapist would prescribe, so he doesn’t want to keep increasing it because I will max out soon. So having days with no medication and then days with medication is a way to keep my body from getting used to the dosage.
I wasn’t sure when I’d try doing this at first, but then when I got sick I just forgot to take my medicine (despite the alarms I set on my phone). There were 3 days in a row that I didn’t take it. Those 3 days were pretty much a blur to me due to how sick I was, so I can’t say if I felt that different compared to when I’m taking them. I tried another day without medicine this past Sunday (it wasn’t a busy day for me so it seemed like a good day to try it) and I did notice a difference. It’s almost as if my anxiety got worse because I was terrified on how I would feel without the medicine.
But I got through the day just fine and since then the past few days have been better days for me. I don’t necessarily feel like the medication is working more. But it feels like the concerns that I have in my head every day are a bit quieter for me. It’s not going to be easy to find days that I’m ok with not taking my medicine, but I’m going to try to find one day a week that I can do it. If I can’t, that’s ok but at least I’m making a real effort in trying it. And knowing how much better I feel this week is motivation to keep having a day off.
Of course, I still wish that Vyvanse works more than it does. It’s unrealistic but I can dream. But at least now I have a much more positive opinion of Vyvanse than I did before and I think that will help with the success of the drug.
Are any of my readers on Vyvanse? I’m curious about your experience on it because when I’ve done Google research it seems like I’m having a unique experience. If you don’t want to comment (and be public about being on it), feel free to use the contact page to send me a message privately.