Monthly Archives: August 2013

Another Birthday Celebration (or A Pie Date!)

Posted on August 16, 2013 | Comments Off

I’ve mentioned last year how much I love birthday freebies. I print out all the freebies I get emailed to me as soon as I get them and I really do try to use a couple (I have yet to ever use the free ice cream at Baskin Robbins though).

One of the freebies that I always look forward to is the free pie at Marie Callenders. It’s a tradition for me to go with my friend Emily for free birthday pie (or pie to celebrate any other special occasion).

There is a fancy Callenders Grill in the Mid-Wilshire area in the same building as the SAG-AFTRA office. We pretty much always go to pie at this one so we can multi-task (we have a friend who works for the SAG Foundation so we try to visit him after pie).

As anyone who enjoys meals at Marie Callenders knows, all meals start with their super yummy cornbread!

Emily and I both ordered the chicken mac and cheese (my photos of it came out really badly).

And then it was time for the main event (at least for us). Pie!

We always get 2 pieces of pie and then we each have half. We also always get the chocolate satin pie. We jokingly call it chocolate baby pie because we think it tastes like chocolate pie and chocolate mousse had a baby (it’s seriously that good!). We get something different for the second piece of pie.

This time, we got cream cheese pie along with the chocolate satin one.

They were seriously sooooo good! And yes, I did track all of my calories for the meal (this ended up being my only meal that day so I actually managed to stay under my calorie goal).

I know that this entire meal is a huge splurge, but since we usually only do it twice a year, I figure that’s ok. Plus, how could I turn down free pie?!?

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Posted in Celebrations, Food, Fun Stuff

Tagged birthday, pie

Positivity (or Maybe My Luck Is Changing)

Posted on August 15, 2013 | Comments Off

In the past, I’ve wondered if I just have bad luck in life. I mean, lots of not so great things have happened to me that I don’t deserve. Like 2 car accidents in one week. Or my hip issues (which is something that I was born with but didn’t discover until the cartilage tore). Or having to worry about a day job (I’ve had plenty of times of unemployment that were not planned nor could I collect unemployment).

But lately, things seem to be going my way.

I had a really amazing week at my day job this week. I had a huge group sale on tickets. The commission I will get from that sale alone will almost completely pay for the deductible when I get my car fixed. I also sold tickets to one lady who has told about 50 of her friends that they all need to buy tickets from me (as long as people calling in ask for me, I get the sale). A few of her friends have called in so far, but I’m expected several more.

I was able to find a bathing suit that not only fits me, but I like! I’m pretty sure that’s a big accomplishment for anyone of any size, but for me, the task felt like it would be impossible. At least until I ordered some things online. Now I’m feeling pretty silly for stressing out over it.

I’m in a good place with my workouts right now. I’m still loving spin class (I mean, I even went on my birthday!). I’m excited to see how the workouts pay off when I go to Tahoe this weekend to see my parents. I’m not used to high elevation, so I’m expecting to have some issues with that. But hopefully I will feel stronger during the hiking and kayaking I’m planning on doing there.

And finally, I’m just all around happier right now. I’ve found that going outside my comfort zone has really allowed me to grow and become a better person. I don’t know others have noticed my increased happiness, but I have. I can mainly tell because I’m having fewer and fewer panic attacks. I still have my big triggers of needles and flying and I doubt those will ever go away. But even the big triggers aren’t affecting me as much as they used to. I’m flying tomorrow and usually by now, I have to start taking my medication to calm me down. I haven’t had to do that yet (I’ll probably starting taking them tonight so I don’t have a crazy panic attack on the plane).

So maybe all those years I was complaining about having bad luck I was bringing it onto myself. I don’t know if having a more positive mindset has changed my luck for the better, but either way, I’m planning on keeping the positivity in and the negativity out.

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Posted in Family, Fitness, Fun Stuff, Shopping, Tough Stuff, Travel

Tagged negativity, panic attack, positivity

The Most Impossible Shopping (or Thank Goodness For Online Stores!)

Posted on August 14, 2013 | Comments Off

With the Hawaii trip coming up super soon, I’ve been doing some clothing inventory figuring out what I still need to get.

I’ve pretty much got everything I need but there are a few things that I’d like to get before the trip. Toward the top of my list right now is shoes for the wedding/rehearsal dinner. I’ve got some cute wedge heels I can wear, but I’d like to see if I could find something more comfortable (and easier to pack). These are not completely needed, but would be nice to have.

One thing that I managed to cross off the list this week was getting another bathing suit. Technically, I had 2 already, but one of them was the last-minute shopping trip bathing suit I got when I needed one for Burke Williams. When I got that one, my future sister-in-law, her friend, and I ran over to Macys to buy bathing suits as quickly as possible. And in the store, I didn’t have too many options. Most of the ones in my size were swim dresses (yes, seriously). The one I ended up getting was ok, but I didn’t love it.

I did find some nice plain black bathing suit bottoms through Old Navy earlier this summer, so I had those. And I got this top through Torrid about a month or two ago.

It’s super cute and comfortable. But because of the Hawaii trip and the fact that I’ll probably need more than one bathing suit on the trip, I had to go shopping for another one.

I was thinking since it was the end of summer I should be able to find some great deals. I was, but the supply was extremely limited. The only tops I could find at Old Navy were bikini tops (and I really don’t want to have my stomach exposed).

I searched lots of the usual websites on a regular basis with no luck. Finally, I tried Target (I swear they aren’t paying me to write this post), and I found a ton of options and they had a “buy one get one 50%” sale!

Since I know that the stores won’t really have any of the bathing suits in my size, I ordered 6 different tops and bottoms to try on at home (and I could return the rest to the store). All of my purchases arrived this weekend, and I spent some time trying everything on (is this fun for anyone?).

Some were easy to eliminate either because of the style or fit. But there were two that I liked that I had to pick between. I ended up going with this top and a another plain black bottom.

I’m actually starting to get a little excited to wear a bathing suit since this new one is so cute! I’m going to be going to Tahoe this weekend to see my family, so I’ll probably get to wear my new bathing suit then as well.

I’m just glad that I can cross another item off of my to do list (and this one was a tough one to get done!)!

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Posted in Fun Stuff, Shopping

Tagged bathing suit, online shopping, plus size, shopping

Birthday Evening (or What Happened After 4pm)

Posted on August 13, 2013 | 2 comments

So, the adventures of my 30th birthday continue.

After getting my hair done, I went home to get dressed for my party at Bodega Wine Bar. I had rented a cute sparkly top from Gwynnie Bee and I was super excited to wear it! The only problem was, the top was now a little too big on me (guess I have been losing a bit of weight). So I ended up wearing a sweater on top to cover up the too-big arm holes. But I think I looked pretty cute.

The actual party was pretty chill, which is exactly how I wanted it. My friend Rayshell came over to my house early (since she works very close to where I live), so we hung out for a bit before heading over to the bar.

When we got to Bodega, we saw the reserved sign right away.

The area we got was right next to the bar (we had a waitress so that didn’t matter too much) and right by a window looking out onto the street (that will come into play a bit later).

Over the course of the evening, about 15 people made it out to celebrate with me. But it was nice that everyone wasn’t there at once so I actually had a chance to chat with everyone who made it.

As I mentioned before, Rayshell was there.

So were my friends Kate and Beth.

And my friend Jennifer who was married earlier this year (her husband came too!).

As well as a bunch of other people (too many pictures to include everyone on here!).

I ended up drinking Prosecco the entire evening (it is one of my favorite things), but our waitress also brought over some celebratory shots for the group to enjoy as well (one was a Soju pineapple mint thing and I don’t remember what the other was). We also got some food for the table.

While the entire evening was fun, one of the funniest things that happened was when one of my co-workers tried to come by. I guess that she forgot to grab her ID with her when she came, so the bouncer wouldn’t let her in. As she was leaving, she noticed me in the window and I guess either she was waving or pointing at me (my back was to the window, so I only heard from my friends that someone was trying to get my attention). I saw her, walked over to the bouncer, and we finally convinced him to let her in without an ID. I was getting a good laugh from that.

Eventually, the evening came to a close (it was pretty close to midnight and I had to work the next morning).

I’m usually not the sort of person who has birthday parties. I normally just do a bunch of little events. Those seem easier to organize and are less stressful. But I have to say that this party was so much fun! I didn’t feel stressed at all (thanks Bodega for making things easy on us!) and I got to see a bunch of friends!

To everyone who said happy birthday to me (in person, on Facebook, on twitter, via email, on the phone), thank you! I had an amazing birthday and you were all a part of it!

Now, I get to move on with my life as a 30-something!

2 Comments

Posted in Celebrations, Food, Fun Stuff

Tagged birthday, party, Santa Monica, wine

Happy Birthday to Me! (or Part 1)

Posted on August 12, 2013 | 2 comments

A lot of things (and a lot of pictures) happened over my birthday, so I’m splitting this into 2 posts. This is pretty much what happened before 4pm on my birthday.

The day started off with happy birthday phone calls from various family members. One of my favorite phone calls to get is from my cousin Stephanie. Her oldest son, Dalton, sings happy birthday to me each year. It’s a tradition that I totally look forward to. This year, we FaceTimed so it was extra special.

The call started with a lovely video chat with my cousin’s youngest son, Hudson (who I will get to meet in real life for the first time at Thanksgiving).

Then a very sleepy Dalton and his sister Annabelle came to the phone to sing to me.

(I love being able to take screenshots of video chat!!!)

After those festivities, it was time for me to head over to SoulCycle for a spin class! This class was with Ben B., who taught the very first class that I went to. I actually hadn’t been to his class since that first one (he doesn’t teach with I can normally go), and it was really fun! He’s so high energy and upbeat.

When I was putting on my heart rate monitor for class, I noticed that even that was celebrating my birthday with me!

During the stretch part at the end of class, one of the front desk people came into the room with a brownie with a candle in it. The entire spin class sang happy birthday to me! It was awesome!

Something else awesome about the class was a group that was in there. Remember last week when I was talking about how “The Biggest Loser” is one of my guilty pleasure but their workouts are a bit unrealistic? Well, it turns out that some of the contestants in the upcoming season of “The Biggest Loser” were in that spin class! I didn’t see any cameras so I have no idea if they will show it on tv. But I did get to see who some of the new contestants are (and no, I didn’t see Ruben Studdard). I didn’t take any pictures of the contestants since there were production people nearby and I didn’t want to get in trouble, but as soon as the new contestants are announced, I’m excited to see who it was that I saw in class! I guess that some of the workouts that they do are realistic since it’s something that I do pretty much every week!

After spin class, I got home and saw these flowers from my parents on my doorstep.

After showering and getting dressed, I headed out to the one pampering thing I decided to do on my birthday. I got a blowout from DryBar. I had never been before, but I figured why not try it out.

It’s super nice inside. I loved the pop of yellow throughout the salon.

They have a menu of styles that you can choose from. I chose the Cosmo-Tai since it seemed pretty fun (and not something I could do on my own).

It also reminded me a bunch of this headshot of mine that I love!

The stylist I got was very nice. She and I chatted a bit and then she got to work.

While she was working on my hair, it didn’t really look at all like the style that I wanted. But I didn’t say anything because I’ve learned that you can’t judge a hairstyle by the process, you have to wait for it to be done.

Once it was done, it looked nothing like the picture in the menu. I asked her to fix it a couple of times, but I realized that it wasn’t going to be what I thought. It was a cute style, but I really wanted what I saw in the photo.

With my cute hairstyle, I headed home and started to get ready for my birthday party. But those photos will have to wait for part 2 coming tomorrow!

2 Comments

Posted in Beauty, Celebrations, Family, Fitness, Fun Stuff

Tagged birthday, DryBar, hair, SoulCycle, Spinning

Dirty Thirty (or A Look Back At My 20s)

Posted on August 9, 2013 | 2 comments

Holy moly, I’m thirty now! This is crazy! I remember growing up and thinking that by thirty I would have my own tv show, be married, and probably already have a kid or two.

Yeah, none of that has happened yet.

But instead of looking back at what didn’t happen in my 20s, I wanted to take a look back at the accomplishments I did have. So here are the important (to me) highlights of my 20s.

I graduated from LMU. I actually was able to graduate in 3 1/2 years because I took some summer school classes and did independent study. I think the fact that I graduated early is something to still be proud of.

I had a “real” job. In 2006, I had a job doing radio sales coordination. It was a salaried job and was a standard 9-5 thing. I hated it. I was miserable a lot because I couldn’t do any acting stuff. But at the time it was the best thing for me because I was working there when I had my hip surgery, so I made money while I was recovering. I was planning on quitting and went to tell my boss that, but he let me know that they were going to lay me off within a month or two, so I stuck it out so I could get the unemployment.

I’ve had dozens of day jobs. I’ve worked everything from movie studio tour guide to dog walk. From personal organizer to substitute teacher. From data entry to transcription. From babysitting to volunteer coordinator. I’ve seriously worked pretty much all types of jobs except retail or being a waitress. Technically right now, I only have my one job, but I still do other random jobs on the side to help out.

I’ve gotten an agent and have gone out on amazing auditions. I’m still not quite where I’d like to be in my acting career, but I’m enjoying the journey. I’ve gone out for small one line (or even one word) parts, and I’ve gone out for the one of the main characters in a new tv show. I’m just waiting for that perfect part for me, but I know it’s coming. And I love that I have such a supportive team working with me.

I’ve found a workout that I love. This is huge for me. In the past, workouts have been just something annoying that I have to do. I’ve had personal trainers before because if I didn’t have that appointment to go to, I probably would have skipped the gym. But now I’ve found something that I actually look forward to doing (I’m even going to a class today to start 30 off right!).

I’ve started this blog and have become a much more honest person with myself and with others. This really is a huge thing for me. My whole life I’ve been pretty secretive about the things I find shameful about myself. But doing that really only makes it worse. By putting it all out there, it’s no longer something to be ashamed of but instead something to learn from and get over. The personal growth that I’ve had since starting this has been incredible (it’s almost better than going to therapy). And the support that I’ve gotten from people who I’ve known for years or who I’ve never met has been truly a gift.

Well, there are a couple of highlights of what I’ve done in past decade. Today, I’m starting off my 30s in an awesome way. I have the day off (because I’m working all weekend this weekend) so I’m going to spin class and then having a fun gathering at Bodega in Santa Monica. Whether or not we’ve met before, if you are local to LA, feel free to come by my party at Bodega. The more the merrier and I want to ring in 30 with as many awesome people as possible!

And since I don’t have a photo (yet) of me celebrating 30, here’s a cute photo of me from my 1st birthday!

2 Comments

Posted in Celebrations, Fun Stuff

Tagged 30, accomplishment, birthday

Reality TV (or How Losing 200 Pounds Can Be Something That Is Booed)

Posted on August 8, 2013 | 1 comment

I’ll admit that reality tv is one of my guilty pleasures. I love “America’s Next Top Model”, “The Amazing Race”, and “Food Network Star”. But I also watch a couple of weight loss related reality tv like “The Biggest Loser” and “Extreme Weight Loss”.

One reason that I enjoy the weight loss reality shows is because most of the time, the people at the beginning are in a worse place than me. I know this is a horrible thought, but it’s nice to see that I’m not the most out of shape person in the world. And it gives me a bit of hope that maybe I can win this battle eventually.

But there are a lot of negative things about these shows. First of all, they are extremely unrealistic. The contestants on them typically aren’t working their jobs (and they get a small stipend from the show for participating). Also, they are working out sometimes 5 or 6 hours a day. If you have a job, you probably don’t have the time to do that. Sometimes contestants on these shows also have either a chef or food delivery service so they don’t have to worry about their food.

Another negative thing about these shows is how the contestants feel about weight loss. On “The Biggest Loser”, when a contestant loses 7 or 8 pounds in a week, they feel like they are a failure. Sometimes the other contestants mention how that person isn’t doing enough. Seriously?!?!?! If I lost 7 pounds in a week I’d be so excited!

But something that really ticked me off happened on this week’s “Extreme Weight Loss”. If you don’t watch the show, it takes place over 1 year and each episode follows one person’s journey. This week is was a girl name Alyssa. She weighed over 400 pounds when everything started. The show gives weight loss goals for every 3 months. She met her first weight loss goal and then started to struggle with the second. And in her struggle, she started to have anorexic and bulimic tendencies. The host of the show did offer her help and had her do a blind weigh in (this is something I have to do at the doctors because I don’t trust their scale).

At the final weigh in for Alyssa, they did it in front of all her friends and family (this is the format for the show). She weighed in and had lost over 200 pounds in one year! But she was a few pounds short of her overall weight loss goal, so when the final number came up, the crowd booed. My mouth dropped open when I watched that. Since when is losing 200 pounds something to boo about? They should be cheering her on no matter what.

But I guess that wouldn’t make good reality tv.

Will I still watch these weight loss reality shows? Yes. They do have good tips in them and they do help motivate me. But I really hope that other people watching can see how what they see on tv isn’t always the most helpful thing when trying to lose weight.

While it may be reality tv, it isn’t reality.

1 Comment

Posted in Fitness, Food, Health, Tough Stuff, Weight Loss

Tagged eating disorder, Extreme Weight Loss, reality tv, scale, The Biggest Loser

Holding Out For Perfection (or Maybe I’m Too Picky)

Posted on August 7, 2013 | Comments Off

While the title of this post might sound like it’s a continuation of my online dating adventures, it’s not (I actually cancelled my account because of some creepy guys on there).

This is about my day job. I’ve been there for over a year now, and I definitely have a love-hate relationship with it.

I love that I’m working for a theater company so I’m close to other creative people. I love that my boss is very cool about me taking time off for auditions. And I love that I’m making relatively decent money now.

But I hate the schedule. I hate working 6 days a week (I have to work Saturday morning after my birthday party). I hate working until 8:30pm 3 nights a week (I’ve missed a ton of events I’ve wanted to go to because of that). And I hate that so much of my pay is based on commissions so I never know how much I’m going to make on each paycheck (it makes budgeting very difficult).

A friend of mine from my old job has come to me a couple of times with some jobs that could use me. The job would be working credit card disputes (I did this for about a year at my old job and was very successful and had a high win rate). The first job was in Orange County and was a standard 9-5 job. I knew this wouldn’t work out because the commute could easily be 1-2 hours each way. And it wouldn’t have the flexibility I need for auditions or booked jobs. The second job is in the valley (still a commute but better). I don’t know a ton of details on it yet since I only heard about it yesterday.

But I have to ask myself if I really want to go back into another job like that. I’ve been looking for something that I could do from home (some credit card dispute jobs do that), so I could have the flexibility I need. I’ve worked from home in the past before and did well at it (except when I did transcription work because the pay was too low for how much work I did).

But am I being too picky by only wanting to find something that works from home? I’m not horribly miserable at my current job, so I’m not rushing out to find something. And in the back of my head, I still think that I might land that series regular acting job which will eliminate the need for a day job.

I really don’t know what to do. I don’t want to turn down a good opportunity, but I don’t even know if the new job or my old job would be considered the good opportunity.

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Posted in Acting, Saving, Tough Stuff, Work

Tagged acting, job

Daily Affirmations (or A Free App Recommendation)

Posted on August 6, 2013 | 1 comment

I’ve been doing affirmations for years. However it hasn’t been something I do regularly even though I’ve seen positive results with them.

I started doing affirmations before auditions in 2007. I took a weekend intensive class with Renita, who is a casting director. She gave us all a CD of declarations to listen to before any major acting moment (audition, callback, heading to set for a big job). I put the declarations on my iPhone and have listened to them every time I’m driving to an actor related meeting or job. I normally listen to it one time, saying all the declarations out loud, and then I change it up and listen to positive music to keep me in a good mindset.

I’ve found that I’m less nervous and more secure in my acting choices since doing this. Even if I’m not booking every job, I’m making a better impression in each office now, so hopefully they’ll bring me back for more auditions.

Well, the other day I was looking for some new apps to put on my iPhone, and I came across the Daily Affirmations app. It was free, so I downloaded it without thinking twice.

And I’m so glad that I did! Each day, you have a new affirmation to look at. What you do with it is your choice. You can say them out loud, write them down somewhere, or just read them for a minute (like I do).

And I really enjoy the affirmations that have been coming up for me so far.

I highly recommend checking this app out (it’s free so why not?).

I don’t know if I’ll do something more involved with these affirmations like I do with my actor declarations, but I can always do that later. For now, I’m enjoying taking a moment each day to read something that really is positive to help me get off to a great start for the day.

1 Comment

Posted in Acting, Fun Stuff

Tagged declarations, iPhone, positivity

Kicking Butt (or Feeling Extra Tough In Spin Class)

Posted on August 5, 2013 | Comments Off

I typically don’t go to spin classes on Sundays. The spin studio is very close to my work, and since Sundays are my day off, I’d rather not have to drive that way. Also, since the studio is a block from the beach, the parking structure is horribly crowded.

But I went yesterday because SoulCycle is running a special right now. I can bring a friend for free on Sundays for the 4pm, 5pm, or 6pm classes (if anyone wants to come with me, let me know!). A co-worker of mine has been wanting to try it, so we decided to go for the 4pm class yesterday.

First of all, this class was with an instructor who was new to me. This always makes me nervous because I’m not sure if I’ll like the class or not and if they will point out that I’m not doing all the standing up work. Fortunately, Patrick who was the instructor, was awesome! I’m going to have to see if I can fit his classes into my schedule (maybe when I’m unemployed again?).

So the co-worker of mine who came with me is a super fit person. She does 3-6 miles every day. So I’m not sure if she thought that the workout would be easy or not, but I felt like I was proving to her how tough I am. I had a similar situation when I used to work out with Richard Simmons on a regular basis. My dad decided to try the class with me, and I think he thought it wouldn’t be too hard before he tried it. And he was proven wrong (my dad is planning on trying spinning with me in the fall and he’s seen some videos on how tough it is).

My co-worker after the class was almost speechless. She was shocked that I do the class on a fairly regular basis (I’m trying for 2 classes each week but I want to push it to 3). I love shocking people with my strength in workout classes. Because of my size, people don’t think I’m that strong. But think about it for a minute. I’m carrying a lot more weight than most people on a daily basis. So my legs have to be strong. As far as my arms being strong, that’s from the weights part of spin classes.

I don’t know if my co-worker will be coming back to the class with me. She sent me a text afterwards saying how wrecked she was. But I liked being able to prove to someone that I may look the way I look right now, but I’m getting tougher and stronger every day.

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Posted in Fitness, Fun Stuff, Health

Tagged SoulCycle, spin class, strong, tough, workout

Monthly Archives: August 2013

Another Birthday Celebration (or A Pie Date!)

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Positivity (or Maybe My Luck Is Changing)

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The Most Impossible Shopping (or Thank Goodness For Online Stores!)

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Birthday Evening (or What Happened After 4pm)

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Happy Birthday to Me! (or Part 1)

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Dirty Thirty (or A Look Back At My 20s)

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Reality TV (or How Losing 200 Pounds Can Be Something That Is Booed)

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Holding Out For Perfection (or Maybe I’m Too Picky)

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Daily Affirmations (or A Free App Recommendation)

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Kicking Butt (or Feeling Extra Tough In Spin Class)

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